tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-65374462965159460512024-02-06T22:32:03.050-08:00(test)Wings Over AmericaPaul Ioriohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08705568747562061407noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6537446296515946051.post-9585882743338515362007-02-21T13:15:00.000-08:002009-07-22T17:35:47.917-07:00The Joys of Flying Over Flyover Country in America"Kim Jong<a href="http://www.nytimes.com/">http://www.nytimes.com</a><br /><br /><strong>I'm Paul Iorio, and here's my regular column,<br />The Daily Digression, which covers pop culture and beyond...</strong><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpf27_qoZoiTN1A_hTnlxUTukK1lq0hNK5r7fo_DUQB8CC3RLvMJ61CQlHJIZU1O76OL7nJyYcgLLA688_xh-vQ-SVSMJb6btYnsxk2TTyVqjYTYXMyt-noU34FBlmsgI99t4g6Nr4SA/s1600-h/meportraitblurry.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; FLOAT: left; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5042616283813076354" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpf27_qoZoiTN1A_hTnlxUTukK1lq0hNK5r7fo_DUQB8CC3RLvMJ61CQlHJIZU1O76OL7nJyYcgLLA688_xh-vQ-SVSMJb6btYnsxk2TTyVqjYTYXMyt-noU34FBlmsgI99t4g6Nr4SA/s200/meportraitblurry.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><strong>MY OTHER WEBSITES: </strong><br />My homepage is at: www.paulliorio.blogspot.com<br />My photography site is: www.paulioriophotos.blogspot.com<br />Free MP3s of my original songs are at www.vibecat.com/pauliorio<br />My other music site (featuring my lyrics) is at: www.pauliorio.blogspot.com<br />My satire and humor website is at: www.ioriosatire.blogspot.com<br />My original screenplay website is at: www.pauliorioscreenplays.blogspot.com.<br /><br />All comments welcome at pliorio@aol.com. (I don't think comments are enabled on this site, by the way.) Original photos on this site are copyrighted.<br /><br />_______________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 26, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>Shining Light on "Shine a Light"</strong><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFGX5SaDD6fknigSpYElHNsBueCbIdO9WGvDhkcB4KoGKxqwHOUMNp5Qt9PMyde4cEACcV5TNlSad4eVj9VLFmUWf9maCxuWyB0UiM2r1P-9pv1d9SbSLOu8G6RgSySnZRAcPfMZpVj1w/s1600-h/scanrollingstones.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5193576970000010866" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFGX5SaDD6fknigSpYElHNsBueCbIdO9WGvDhkcB4KoGKxqwHOUMNp5Qt9PMyde4cEACcV5TNlSad4eVj9VLFmUWf9maCxuWyB0UiM2r1P-9pv1d9SbSLOu8G6RgSySnZRAcPfMZpVj1w/s400/scanrollingstones.jpg" /></a><br /><em>torn, frayed, mostly fabulous</em><br /><br /><br />I finally got around to seeing "Shine a Light"<br /><br />and couldn't help but think it might have benefited<br /><br />from a more straightforward approach cinematographically<br /><br />instead of the incessant cutting that makes this more<br /><br />of an editor's film than a director's film, though<br /><br />anything Martin Scorsese is involved with is a<br /><br />Scorsese film, period. Then again, any movie the<br /><br />Rolling Stones are involved with is a Stones film,<br /><br />period, so there is almost a tug of war between<br /><br />strong-willed auteurs here, with Scorsese<br /><br />seen pleading for a setlist at one point, which<br /><br />he definitely could've used to block and plan<br /><br />shots for his cinematographers who seem to be<br /><br />scrambling frantically to catch pictures of lightning<br /><br />after the lightning has already struck, though every<br /><br />now and then they do catch and bottle a bolt<br /><br />or two.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />But it would've been nice if one of the cameras had<br /><br />caught, say, Darryl Jones playing the bass intro<br /><br />to "Live With Me" instead of focusing on one of<br /><br />the guitarists or had shown Charlie Watts doing<br /><br />that vintage drum roll that opens "All Down<br /><br />the Line."<br /><br /><br /><br />The setlist is a masterpiece, around as good as the<br /><br />one at the Olympia show in Paris captured in the<br /><br />"Four Flicks" film, though one can quibble at the edges.<br /><br />Perhaps the better-live-than-on-the-album "You<br /><br />Got Me Rocking" might've worked better than the<br /><br />better-on-the-album-than-live "Shattered," which<br /><br />I've never heard performed successfully live.<br /><br /><br /><br />And "Sweet Virginia" or "Dead Flowers" could have<br /><br />best filled the "country" slot reserved here for<br /><br />failed joke "Faraway Eyes." And "Respectable" would've<br /><br />been the perfect song to play with the Clintons<br /><br />in the audience. And what about a nod to "Bigger Bang"<br /><br />with "Oh No, Not You Again," the best of the new<br /><br />ones live.<br /><br /><br /><br />The choices are otherwise dead on; "She Was Hot," a<br /><br />highlight, has terrific, unexpected momentum; "Loving Cup"<br /><br />now sounds like it was written with Jack White in mind<br /><br />all along; "As Tears Go By" has a real pulse, thanks to<br /><br />Watts; "Connection" is one of the band's best<br /><br />overlooked songs of the 1960s, though Keith botches it<br /><br />here (he did a far better version in Oakland, Calif.,<br /><br />shortly after this gig).<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />And each guest star tops the previous one, with<br /><br />Buddy Guy leveling the place with "Champagne & Reefer"<br /><br />and with offhand artistry that is assured, authentic<br /><br />(he livens up the place much as Dr. John did in<br /><br />"The Last Waltz"). Christina Aquilera, trading vocals<br /><br />with Jagger on "Live With Me," is a powerhouse, a hurricane,<br /><br />always blowing audiences away. (Wish they'd brought her<br /><br />on for the Merry Clayton part of "Gimme Shelter,"<br /><br />not played here.)<br /><br /><br /><br />This is a concert film with spliced-in archival footage<br /><br />that is often hilarious and rare while heavily favoring<br /><br />self-promo bits in which Jagger one-ups various<br /><br />interviewers -- as opposed to the Maysles brothers's<br /><br />"Gimme Shelter," which shows Jagger at both his wittiest<br /><br />and unwittiest (remember the "philosophically trying"<br /><br />remarks?). Though the film doesn't pretend to be any<br /><br />sort of definitive docu on the Stones, one still wonders<br /><br />where Brian Jones is in all the vintage footage;<br /><br />Jones has gone from being wildly overemphasized as a Stones<br /><br />member to, today, being almost completely erased from the<br /><br />band's history. That said, it's telling that the group<br /><br />got only better in the years after Jones's death (see:<br /><br />"Exile," "Sticky Fingers," "Some Girls").<br /><br /><br /><br />They performed almost half of the "Some Girls" CD,<br /><br />likely to remain their best-selling studio album of<br /><br />all time, now that the dust has settled, though at<br /><br />the time who'd have guessed that its unlikely combination<br /><br />of disco and punk, warring genres in their day, would<br /><br />have eclipsed both "Sticky Fingers" and "Exile." But it's<br /><br />the closest the Stones have come to a diamond seller<br /><br />like "Nevermind" or "Boston," which they've never had,<br /><br />even if their cultural influence has been far greater<br /><br />than all but a few in the rock era. Today, it's easy to<br /><br />see that "Some Girls," released 30 years ago this June,<br /><br />had a sort of shock jock element that made it popular<br /><br />among millions of non-Stones fans, though that<br /><br />element was partly excised in this film, with the<br /><br />deletion of an explicit verse from the title track,<br /><br />a song rarely (if ever) performed by the Stones.<br /><br /><br /><br />I was lucky enough to have heard the very first public<br /><br />performance of "Some Girls" material by the Stones, on<br /><br />the first night of their "Some Girls" tour, June 10, 1978,<br /><br />a couple days after the album's release, at the Lakeland<br /><br />(Florida) Civic Center -- and I saw the group from only<br /><br />several feet away.<br /><br /><br /><br />As I recall, the new album was erupting unexpectedly,<br /><br />so the band was in an extremely good mood at this<br /><br />kick-off gig in '78. In fact, they seemed<br /><br />downright giddy and manic and drunk on (among other<br /><br />things) their own effortless rock 'n' roll mastery.<br /><br />I remember seeing Jagger take the stage to the<br /><br />opening chords of "All Down the Line," as flashing<br /><br />lights briefly illuminated his leap into the air<br /><br />(he looked just like a whip or a lightning bolt) and<br /><br />remember seeing him physically and playfully<br /><br />push Ron Wood to the side of the stage at another point.<br /><br />And I remember how eerie and spooky it looked and<br /><br />sounded to see Jagger right in front of me singing that<br /><br />falsetto part of "Miss You" -- and he was singing it<br /><br />live for the first-time ever.<br /><br /><br /><br />A year later, with those songs still ringing in my<br /><br />head, I moved to Manhattan, where I lived for years at<br /><br />the Beacon, 25 floors above the theater where the<br /><br />concert in "Shine a Light" took place. In those days<br /><br />I used to travel to the Beacon Theater by...taking<br /><br />the elevator!<br /><br /><br /><br />Which is part of what makes that final shot of "Shine a Light"<br /><br />(in which Scorsese directs the cameraman to film from<br /><br />above the Broadway marquee to the rooftops of the Upper<br /><br />West Side, literally between the moon and New York City) so<br /><br />magical to me. And it suggests an even better flick: a<br /><br />movie of a concert on the Beacon roof, a la "Let It Be," in<br /><br />which the Manhattan skyline co-stars.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.rollingstones.com/bin/galImg/siteFiles/9923f0c159."><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.rollingstones.com/bin/galImg/siteFiles/9923f0c159." /></a><br /><em>the Stones's bestseller, released 30 years ago this June</em><br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 24, 2008<br /><br /><br />I was reading a transcript of the latest<br /><br />audio recording from Osama bin Laden the<br /><br />other day and wondering: is he dating? Does he<br /><br />have a lover? Would bin Laden be a less violent<br /><br />person if he had a sexual partner? Could we save<br /><br />the world from his destructiveness by simply...setting<br /><br />him up on a date?<br /><br /><br /><br />Hence the origin of my screenplay, "Play It<br /><br />Again, Osama," presented below:<br /><br /><strong><br />Play It Again, Osama<br /><br />By Paul Iorio*</strong><br /><br /><br />INT. OSAMA'S BACHELOR APARTMENT, SOMEWHERE IN WAZIRISTAN<br /><br />OSAMA BIN LADEN (to himself): What's the matter with me?<br />Why can't I be cool like the Prophet Mohammed?<br />What's the secret?<br /><br />An imaginary Prophet Mohammed, wearing a fedora and looking<br />and sounding like Humphrey Bogart, appears from the shadows.<br /><br /><br />PROPHET MOHAMMED: There's no secret, kid.<br />Infidels are simple. I never met one that didn't understand<br />a slap in the mouth or a slug from a .44.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA BIN LADEN: Yeah, 'cause you're Mohammed.<br />I'm not like you. When you lost Aisha, weren't you crushed?<br /><br /><br />PROPHET MOHAMMED: Nothing a little bourbon and soda<br />wouldn't fix. Take my advice and forget all the romantic stuff.<br />The world is full of infidels to fight. All you have to do is whistle.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: He's right. You give the unbelievers an inch<br />and they step all over you. Why can't I develop that attitude?<br />[mimicking Mohammed] Nothing a little bourbon and soda<br />couldn't fix.<br />[He swigs a shot of Old Crow, gags.]<br /><br /><br />CUT TO:<br /><br />INT. TORA BORA APARTMENT OF DICK AND LINDA CHRISTIE (OSAMA'S FRIENDS)<br /><br />LINDA CHRISTIE: Osama's calling again. We've got to find him a girl.<br />Somebody he can be with, get excited about.<br /><br />DICK CHRISTIE: We'll have to find him a nice girl.<br /><br />LINDA: There must be somebody out there. Someone to take his<br />mind off losing Mohamed Atta. I think he really loved Atta.<br /><br /><br />DICK [picking up phone]: I know just the girl for him.<br /><br /><br />CUT TO:<br /><br />INT. OSAMA'S APARTMENT<br /><br />Osama is preparing for his date, which is in an hour or so.<br />Again, from the shadows comes an imaginary Prophet Mohammed.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: You're starting off on the wrong foot.<br /><br />OSAMA: Yeah, negative.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Sure. They're getting the best of you<br />before the game starts. What's that stuff you put on your face?<br /><br />OSAMA: Canoe. It's an aftershave lotion.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: You know, kid, somewhere in life<br />you got turned around. It's her job to smell nice for you.<br />The only bad thing is if she turns out to be a virgin --<br />or an agent for the JTTF!<br /><br />OSAMA: With my luck, she'll turn out to be both.<br /><br /><br />TITLE CARD: Later That Night....<br /><br /><br />INT. OSAMA'S APARTMENT -- LATE AT NIGHT<br /><br />The doorbell rings and Osama opens the door. It's Linda.<br /><br /><br /><br />LINDA: How did the date go?<br /><br />OSAMA: It never would have worked between us.<br />She's a Shiite, I'm a Sunni, it's a great religious abyss.<br /><br />LINDA: [laughing]<br /><br />OSAMA: You're laughing and my sex life<br />is turning into the Petrified Forest.<br />Millions of women in the Northwest<br />Territories and I can't wind up with one!<br /><br /><br />Osama takes a seat on the couch and Linda sits next to him.<br /><br />OSAMA: I'm turning into the strike-out king<br />of Waziristan!<br /><br />LINDA: You need to be more confident, secure.<br /><br />OSAMA: You know who's not insecure?<br />The Prophet Mohammed.<br /><br />LINDA: That's not real life.<br />You set too high a standard.<br /><br />OSAMA: If I'm gonna identify with someone,<br />who am I gonna pick? My imam?<br />Mohammed's a perfect image.<br /><br /><br />LINDA: You don't need to pretend. You're you.<br /><br /><br /><br />Osama nudges closer to Linda on the couch.<br /><br />The imaginary Mohammed appears and speaks.<br /><br /><br />MOHAMMED: Go ahead, make your move.<br /><br />OSAMA: No, I can't.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Take her and kiss her..<br /><br /><br />LINDA (getting up to go to the kitchen): I'll get us both a drink.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Well, kid, you blew it.<br /><br />OSAMA: I can't do it. We're platonic friends.<br />I can't spoil that by coming on.<br />She'll slap my face.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: I've had my face slapped plenty.<br /><br />OSAMA: But your turban<br />don't go flying across the room.<br /><br /><br />Linda returns with two drinks.<br /><br /><br />LINDA: Here we are, you can start on this.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Go ahead, kiss her.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: I can't.<br /><br />The phone rings and startles Osama, as he answers it.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA (into phone): Hi, Dick. Yes, she's here.<br />I was going out -- I had a Polish date.<br /><br />He hands the phone to Linda.<br /><br /><br />MOHAMMED: Relax. You're as nervous as Abu Jahl was before<br />I beat his brains out at the Battle of Badr. All you've got to do is<br />make your move.<br /><br />OSAMA: This is crazy. We'll wind up<br />on al Jazeera!<br /><br />LINDA (into phone): OK, goodbye.<br /><br />LINDA: Dick sounded down. I think<br />he's having trouble in Karachi. I wonder<br />why he never asks me along on his trips.<br /><br />OSAMA: Maybe he's got something<br />going on the side. A fling.<br /><br />LINDA: If I fell for another man,<br />it'd have to be more than just a fling.<br />I'd have to feel something more serious.<br />Are you shaking?<br /><br />OSAMA: Just chilly.<br /><br />LINDA: It's not very cold.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Move closer to her.<br /><br />OSAMA: How close?<br /><br />MOHAMMED: The distance of Flight 175 to the south tower..<br /><br />OSAMA: That's very close.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Now, get ready for the big move<br />and do exactly as I tell you.<br /><br /><br />Suddenly an imaginary Mohamed Atta appears and<br />confronts the Prophet Mohammed.<br /><br /><br />ATTA [to Mohammed]: I warned you to leave my ex-lover alone.<br /><br /><br />Atta draws a pistol and shoots Mohammed.<br /><br /><br />Osama looks a bit panicky now that Mohammed is gone.<br /><br /><br />LINDA: I guess I'd better fix the steaks.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: Your eyes are like two thick juicy steaks.<br /><br /><br />Osama kisses Linda, who recoils, pushing him away.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: I was joking. I was just testing you.<br />It was a platonic kiss.<br /><br /><br />LINDA: I think I'd better go home.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: You're making a mistake.<br /><br /><br />Linda waves goodbye and leaves the apartment.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: I attacked her. I'm a vicious jungle beast..<br />I'm not the Prophet Mohammed. I never will be.<br />I'm a disgrace to my sex. I should get a job at an Arabian palace<br />as a eunuch.<br /><br /><br />The doorbell rings.<br /><br /><br />OSAMA: That's the vice squad. [He opens the door, and Linda is there.]<br /><br />LINDA: Did you say you loved me?<br /><br /><br />Osama and Linda embrace and kiss and the scene fades.<br /><br /><br />INT. OSAMA'S APARTMENT -- THE NEXT DAY<br /><br /><br />MOHAMMED: That's all there is to it.<br /><br />OSAMA: For you, because you're Mohammed.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Everybody is at certain times.<br /><br />OSAMA: I guess the secret's not being you, it's being me.<br /><br />MOHAMMED: Here's looking at you, kid.<br /><br /><br />*with massive apologies to Woody Allen.<br /><br />-------<br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 21, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Oh! Ye bitter Pennsylvanians, come 'round to the polls,</strong><br /><br />but drink not from the chalice of disappointment and<br /><br />woe, or seek succor by clinging to thy religion and<br /><br />thy guns, when ye cast ye ballots in the Primary of<br /><br />the Greatest Publick Importance, at least this week,<br /><br />until next month, when the next state decideth.<br /><br /><br /><br />Thou must not delayeth thy journey to thy polls with vain<br /><br />prayer or the reloading of thy guns. Thou must not<br /><br />cling to that which provides false solace in grim<br /><br />times. Thou must not pray out of bitterness in thy<br /><br />voting booth upon the altar of discredited touch screens,<br /><br />or place thy bullets amidst the paper ballots that have<br /><br />largely replaced thy touch screens. Oh, ye bitter<br /><br />Pennsylvanians, put aside thy clinging and loading and<br /><br />praying to dodge the sniper fire on the way to the<br /><br />Primary of Publick Importance!<br /><br /><br />But I digresseth. Paul<br /><br /><br />_________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 17, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>The 'Gotcha' Debate</strong><br /><br /><br />I just saw the ABC debate, in which four millionaires<br /><br />who have top-notch health insurance talked for two<br /><br />hours in prime time about everything except<br /><br />health care reform. Or at least it seemed that way.<br /><br /><br /><br />The short math is this: Hillary won the debate,<br /><br />with Stephanopoulos coming in a close second,<br /><br />Gibson third, and Obama fourth.<br /><br /><br /><br />Thing is, Clinton has really grown to the point where<br /><br />(now that she's losing) she finally seems like a<br /><br />credible president. Too late. Too bad.<br /><br /><br /><br />Obama seemed winded, weary, tired, on defense. The<br /><br />Wright thing hurts him. The Ayers thing hurts him.<br /><br />The flag lapel, Bittergate -- it all mounts up. Pretty<br /><br />soon he looks pretty unelectable against McCain.<br /><br /><br /><br />Gibson/Stephanopoulos seemed to be harder on Obama than on<br /><br />Clinton, who they should've pursued on the sniper lie; the<br /><br />question Steph should've asked but didn't is: what were<br /><br />you confusing the Bosnia incident with?<br /><br /><br /><br />The odd thing is that I began to think in mid-debate, gazing<br /><br />at Obama, that he could very well become the most<br /><br />unlikely general election winner in presidential history.<br /><br />Reason I thought that is because they showed a clip<br /><br />of McCain, who looked so old and creaky as he stumbled over<br /><br />his words, and I felt that, with McCain's health problems, he<br /><br />might become disabled by, say, a stroke, before<br /><br />November and have to be replaced by his running mate,<br /><br />probably Romney, who Obama could handily beat.<br /><br /><br /><br />Just as Obama became a US Senator because of a<br /><br />fluke -- remember how the main contender had to drop out<br /><br />because of scandal, leaving the GOP to consider Mike Ditka as<br /><br />a contender? -- so Obama could become president because<br /><br />of the random nature of politics.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, Hillary has also become much more entertaining and got off<br /><br />the best zingers of the night: Dick Cheney is the 4th branch<br /><br />of government, this may be the first time a president<br /><br />took us to war but refused to pay for it. I think that Crown<br /><br />Royal has opened up whole new doors of perception for this<br /><br />former Goldwater gal, who may yet be the nominee,<br /><br />but probably won't.<br /><br />-------------<br /><br /><br />If I were at NBC Entertainment, I'd immediately<br /><br />start creating a new prime-time sitcom starring<br /><br />Kristen Wiig (called "The Kristen Wiig Show" or<br /><br />"The Kristen Wiig-Out!" or "Flip Your Wiig"<br /><br />or something like that), in which the SNL<br /><br />player would play a thirtysomething<br /><br />nervous wreck in the style of some of the characters<br /><br />she plays on SNL. It's becoming increasingly<br /><br />obvious that in the constellation of stars<br /><br />at SNL, she's outshining lots of 'em. (She nearly<br /><br />brought down the house with her "just joking" bit<br /><br />last week and with the "surprise party" sketch<br /><br />from the previous week, and I'm still chuckling over<br /><br />her Peter Pan; by the way, one of the magical things<br /><br />about Penelope is the way she appears unexpectedly,<br /><br />almost floatingly, in different parts of the master shot<br /><br />throughout the sketch.) Just don't name it "The New<br /><br />Adventures of the Old Kristen." Just joking.<br /><br /><br />---------<br /><br /><br />Wow, the Daily Digression seems to be setting<br /><br />trends these days -- or at least it's preceding<br /><br />the coverage agenda in some publications.<br /><br /><br /><br />For example, The Digression has been talking for<br /><br />weeks about Obama being the new Dukakis and/or<br /><br />Stevenson (I called him "Adlai Dukakis" the<br /><br />other day). Now, in Maureen Dowd's latest<br /><br />column in the New York Times, she makes the same<br /><br />comparison (though, truth be told, I don't think<br /><br />she's a Daily Digression reader).<br /><br /><br /><br />Also, I wrote an interesting line the day before<br /><br />yesterday in one of my Digressions:<br /><br />"One predicts the future, to the meager degree that one<br /><br />can, by looking at the past, not at the future," I wrote.<br /><br />Nice line (if I should say so myself!).<br /><br /><br /><br />In today's Times, I hear an echo: "By looking into history,<br /><br />we can see the future," the paper quotes some<br /><br />guy saying in today's paper in a story about a Tibet<br /><br />museum; I'd love to hear the interview tape on<br /><br />that one; I may be wrong but I<br /><br />bet it's one of those things where the reporter is<br /><br />virtually putting the words in the source's mouth,<br /><br />i.e., "Why does history matter? Is it because that's<br /><br />how we see the future?")<br /><br /><br /><br />There are other examples, too, both at The Times and<br /><br />at other publications, but I don't have time to<br /><br />detail it; I'm too busy coming up with the stuff<br /><br />they'll echo in coming days.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />P.S. -- You know, I hear there are expensive journalism<br /><br />schools that offer courses like: "How to Get Away with<br /><br />Plagiarism in a Completely Legitimate Way by Slightly<br /><br />Modifying an Idea or a Sentence, Putting the Words in<br /><br />Someone Else's Mouth or Rushing Stolen Ideas From<br /><br />Obscure Sources into Print Before the Originator<br /><br />Does: 101." If they don't offer that course,<br /><br />it's learned by some on the job.<br /><br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 16, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>Now More Than Ever, We Need an LBJ</strong><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_pUV3cSqFjjxRVtVS15OQ2hlVEiinjS7DB8wrkO5m9pQ3uFe7xOu0F-S8iTMH5LFLI5rHtxVDvKPAYFBpViYn0AcNLKk86rV9xV1wLg2eAXcMsGuwTscpi66O-tN8fm5LESuw4dutTQ/s1600-h/scanlbj.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5189850272893163874" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_pUV3cSqFjjxRVtVS15OQ2hlVEiinjS7DB8wrkO5m9pQ3uFe7xOu0F-S8iTMH5LFLI5rHtxVDvKPAYFBpViYn0AcNLKk86rV9xV1wLg2eAXcMsGuwTscpi66O-tN8fm5LESuw4dutTQ/s400/scanlbj.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Strong persuader.</em><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />It's about health care, stupid.<br /><br /><br /><br />Because this has gone on too long. The impasse<br /><br />feels permanent, and probably is.<br /><br /><br /><br />In order to provide health insurance for the<br /><br />48 million Americans without it, we need a president<br /><br />who's an arm twister, a son-of-a-bitch,<br /><br />someone who's gonna make threats and make good on<br /><br />them, step on toes, be merciless -- and all in an<br /><br />effective way.<br /><br /><br /><br />We need an LBJ.<br /><br /><br /><br />Remember Lyndon? He could be rude and coarse and a<br /><br />bully, but he...got...it...done. He rammed major<br /><br />civil rights legislation through the<br /><br />Congress as president -- even if he had to make ugly<br /><br />ultimatums about canceling that bridge project in your<br /><br />district or had to get in your face as he thumped your<br /><br />chest with his finger.<br /><br /><br /><br />And his tactics are, frankly, the only way the<br /><br />8 million uninsured kids in this country will<br /><br />be able to see a doctor if they're sick. (I mean,<br /><br />think of it: 47 million people. That's the entire<br /><br />population of South Korea! The whole population of<br /><br />England is only around 10 million more than that.)<br /><br /><br /><br />Problem is, there is no LBJ, or anyone nearly as effective,<br /><br />running for president this year.<br /><br /><br /><br />Yeah, Hillary is feisty but more often merely mean (and sort<br /><br />of weak), and she has already failed at pushing through<br /><br />health care. Whatever her excuses, her legacy so far has<br /><br />been one of ineffectiveness.<br /><br /><br /><br />Obama is a strong persuader -- but it's discouraging and<br /><br />telling that his golden oratory about health care has not<br /><br />inspired the current Congress to pass a single payer plan<br /><br />or anything close to it. One has to wonder whether he'd<br /><br />fare any better as president.<br /><br /><br /><br />John McCain sounds like someone who has been rich too<br /><br />long to understand what a shrieking nightmare it is<br /><br />not to have health insurance; perhaps if he<br /><br />were forced to use only Clearasil to combat his next<br /><br />bout of melanoma, or to use Listerine to treat his<br /><br />root canal, he'd get it. (And don't tell me<br /><br />about the deprivations of McCain's youth; that was<br /><br />too many decades ago to be relevant today.)<br /><br /><br /><br />The 44th president of the United States is not<br /><br />likely to provide health care to the 47 million<br /><br />uninsured, because there's just too much money in<br /><br />the Health Care Industrial Complex. I mean, making<br /><br />huge profits off of sick people is what the insurers<br /><br />and Big Pharma do, which is why I'm surprised<br /><br />there isn't more of a popular uprising<br /><br />and revulsion about it.<br /><br /><br /><br />It seems as if protest -- coupled with a sympathetic<br /><br />president -- is the only way sick people are going<br /><br />to get care in this country.<br /><br /><br /><br />If activists would put aside relatively marginal issues<br /><br />for a time to focus on the Big Kahuna, we might be able<br /><br />to save lives. In other words, come down from your oaks<br /><br />(once you've saved them), take your minds off gay marriage<br /><br />and the WTO for a couple years, and unite and focus solely<br /><br />on effective, extreme civil disobedience and protest<br /><br />that target the health care moguls who are making money<br /><br />off the sick. Find out where the CEOs of the top Pharm<br /><br />companies and health insurance providers live, and then<br /><br />organize big raucous protests in front of their mansions<br /><br />relentlessly.<br /><br /><br /><br />If we can't get an LBJ in the White House in January,<br /><br />then the people themselves will have to become the<br /><br />arm-twisters.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[above photo from Life magazine]</em><br /><br />_____________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 15, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />I betcha Barack tries a cowboy hat next.<br /><br /><br /><br />Yup, any day now I bet Obama's handlers<br /><br />are gonna put him in a Stetson and have him<br /><br />do a two-step to George Strait or maybe have him<br /><br />croon some Toby Keith for YouTube consumption.<br /><br /><br /><br />And he'd better do that or something like it quick,<br /><br />because this race is quickly shaping into a contest<br /><br />between Dwight Dole and Adlai Dukakis.<br /><br /><br /><br />Unpopular truth be told, Barack was right when he<br /><br />said people cling to religion and guns out of a sort of<br /><br />bitterness or desperation. Yes, religion is the opiate<br /><br />of the people (as you-know-who once put it),<br /><br />the delusion of last resort for the hopeless. But<br /><br />I don't expect that my own non-theistic views about<br /><br />religion will become mainstream for another, oh, 400<br /><br />years or so. Until the mysteries explained<br /><br />away by science are accepted by people who haven't<br /><br />studied science, which is to say most voters, religion<br /><br />will continue to exert its irrational hold on the<br /><br />electorate.<br /><br /><br /><br />How do I know that's likely to be true? By seeing how<br /><br />far we've grown in 2008 from the literalist<br /><br />Christianity rampant 400 years ago, in 1608, and then<br /><br />extrapolating that trajectory into the next 400 years.<br /><br />And the trajectory of the centuries is clearly in the<br /><br />opposite direction of religion, or at least in the<br /><br />opposite direction of fundamentalism. (One predicts<br /><br />the future, to the meager degree that one can, by<br /><br />looking at the past, not at the future.)<br /><br /><br /><br />But then, see, I can speak the truth because I ain't<br /><br />running for anything. Barack is.<br /><br /><br /><br />And if I were running for office, I wouldn't say what he<br /><br />said in San Francisco last week; it suggests that he doesn't<br /><br />have the level of circumspection required of a world<br /><br />leader. It implies that he is more prone to say, as<br /><br />president, that (for example) some of the people of<br /><br />the Northwest Territories of Pakistan are backward in their<br /><br />fundamentalist beliefs -- which may be true but is not<br /><br />something you want to say if you're negotiating with the<br /><br />new president of Pakistan.<br /><br /><br /><br />It's funny: now that Americans have gotten to know him,<br /><br />Barack seems less too-black and more too-Harvard to his<br /><br />opponents (which is always what happens when you get to<br /><br />know somebody from a different ethnic group; at some point,<br /><br />they stop being Irish or Mexican or Jewish or African-American<br /><br />and start being that snob or that dullard or that<br /><br />artist or that really intuitive guy -- i.e., an individual).<br /><br /><br /><br />In the end, in November, the central irony of the<br /><br />2008 election may be that the first major black candidate<br /><br />for president, Obama, spouting rich guy Harvardisms too<br /><br />true for the campaign trail, was defeated because he was<br /><br />too white.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 14, 2008<br /><br /><br /><em>humor by paul iorio</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>Little-Known Popes in Papal History</strong><br /><br /><br />Pope Benedict XVI is visiting the U.S. this week for<br /><br />the first time since becoming pontiff in 2005, and he<br /><br />is, of course, not the most famous pope in<br /><br />Vatican history, though he's also not the most<br /><br />obscure.<br /><br /><br /><br />In fact, there have been many lesser-known popes<br /><br />through the centuries, and now may be the time to<br /><br />remember some of them. Here are ten:<br /><br /><br />POPE NAPOLEON THE 13TH<br />Mad Pope Napoleon the 13th's brief reign was marked by grandiose<br />plans and an obsession with Napoleon Bonaparte. He was deposed<br />when he tried to turn the Vatican into a nuclear power. (1952)<br /><br /><br />POPE LUCIFER<br />An experimental pope who advocated praying to the Devil and to<br />God in order to cover all bases. (431 A.D.)<br /><br /><br />POPE JESUS GOD THE SECOND<br />For all the arrogance of his name, Jesus God 2 actually turned<br />out to be somewhat humble and unassuming, noted mostly for his<br />punctuality. Was convinced the Old Testament had been penned by<br />a guy named Smith. (1564)<br /><br /><br />POPE MUHAMMAD THE FIRST<br />With the Ottomans threatening Western Europe, the Vatican<br />decided to throw Constantinople a bone by elevating a former<br />imam to the top spot. Muhammad the First, a lapsed Muslim who<br />fled Turkey and converted to Catholicism, fell from favor after<br />he proposed building minarets atop St. Peter’s Basilica. (1627)<br /><br /><br />POPE KEITH<br />A hippie pope known for his casual manner and affinity for<br />pop culture, he dispensed with Latin rites in favor of<br />"happenings." (Sept. 1974 to Sept. 1974)<br /><br /><br />POPE SASKATOON, GOVERNOR OF SASKATCHEWAN<br />As his expansive title suggests, Saskatoon might have been<br />a bit more preoccupied with claiming long-denied status<br />from the folks back home than with his duties as pope. (1910)<br /><br /><br />POPE LITERALIST THE 16TH<br />Took transubstantiation far more literally than most; after<br />a car accident, he insisted Vatican doctors give him a<br />blood transfusion using Chianti Classico instead of blood,<br />a fatal decision. Advocated medical care for the dead, who<br />he called the "as yet unrisen." (1960)<br /><br /><br />POPE JOHNNY THE FIRST<br />An American greaser of the 1950s -- and self-styled<br />"Method Pope” -- who rode a Harley to work. (1956)<br /><br /><br />POPE DIDDY<br />The first hip hop pope. Expanded the use of "signs of the Cross"<br />to include gang hand signs. (1998)<br /><br /><br />POPE RABBI GOLDSTEIN<br />Not officially a pope or a rabbi, and operating for a time<br />from a psychiatric facility in Antwerp, where he occasionally<br />broadcast a syndicated faith program called “This Week in Eternal<br />Damnation," he actually convinced several dozen people, mostly<br />Belgians, that he was the first Jewish pope. (1988)<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />____________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 8, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Of all the cities in North America, I'd say<br /><br />San Francisco is probably the last place<br /><br />that one would want this year's Olympic torch to<br /><br />pass through, unless you're looking for turbulence.<br /><br />As everyone knows, San Francisco virtually<br /><br />invented protest and demonstrations and civil<br /><br />disobedience, I think. Or at least it perfected<br /><br />dissent, raising it to a craft as a high as the<br /><br />protesters on the Golden Gate bridge yesterday<br /><br />morning.<br /><br /><br /><br />The Chinese government is learning what the idiot<br /><br />hijackers of United Flight 93 in 2001 also<br /><br />quickly discovered: people in the Bay Area don't<br /><br />acquiesce when it comes to tyranny and don't<br /><br />take well to totalitarian types and will "place<br /><br />their bodies on the gears of the machine"<br /><br />to stop it from running altogether, if necessary,<br /><br />to quote Mario Savio.<br /><br /><br /><br />So it's as puzzling as a Puzzle Tree to see that<br /><br />the powers-that-be are allowing The Torch to wend<br /><br />its way through the streets of San Francisco tomorrow,<br /><br />because there is no way that Free Tibet activists are<br /><br />going to let that happen without incident. It's not<br /><br />a question of whether there will be disruption on<br /><br />Wednesday (or as the San Francisco Examiner once put<br /><br />it, "Wensday"), but how much disruption there<br /><br />will be.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Was listening to the "Moonlight" sonata the<br /><br />other day and caught myself thinking,<br /><br />this is almost as brilliant as "Street Spirit"<br /><br />or "Lucky" (I bet Yorke/Greenwood's melodies<br /><br />resonate into the far reaches of this century --<br /><br />the part we won't be a part of -- and maybe<br /><br />beyond. By the way, Radiohead headlines<br /><br />a 3-day music fest in Golden Gate Park<br /><br />in San Francisco in August, two years after<br /><br />the band memorably premiered a dozen tracks<br /><br />from its latest album, "In Rainbows," in<br /><br />Berkeley and elsewhere.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />NBC has an institutional memory that reminds<br /><br />it that "Seinfeld" took a few years to find<br /><br />its audience, and that may have played into the<br /><br />its decision to renew "Friday Night Lights"<br /><br />for a third season, starting in early '09 (after<br /><br />a fall run on DirecTV).<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />By the way, I was re-watching Edward Burns's<br /><br />amazing "The Brothers McMullen" the other night,<br /><br />after not having seen it for many years, and<br /><br />couldn't help but think of Coach Taylor's wife in<br /><br />FNL every time Connie Britton, who plays Molly<br /><br />McMullen, appeared on screen. It was Britton's film<br /><br />debut, and it's easy to see her performance in<br /><br />a whole new light, now that she's so identified<br /><br />with "Friday Night Lights."<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Wow, whatta setlist. Nearly half of the "Some Girls"<br /><br />album, the cream of "Exile," rarity "As Tears Go By"<br /><br />(not played in concert until the months preceding this<br /><br />show), the underrated "She Was Hot" (from the not-underrated<br /><br />"Undercover" album), and "Connection" from that treasure<br /><br />trove of mini-gems, "Between the Buttons").<br /><br /><br /><br />Can't wait to see "Shine a Light," Martin Scorsese's<br /><br />Rolling Stones concert film docu. I'm told this is<br /><br />the list:<br /><br /><br />Jumpin’ Jack Flash<br />Shattered<br />She Was Hot<br />All Down the Line<br />Loving Cup<br />As Tears Go By<br />Some Girls<br />Just My Imagination<br />Faraway Eyes<br />Champagne & Reefer<br />Tumbling Dice<br />You Got the Silver<br />Connection<br />Sympathy for the Devil<br />Live With Me<br />Start Me Up<br />Brown Sugar<br />Satisfaction<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 6, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Is The Impeachment of President McCain Now Inevitable?</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />WASHINGTON, D.C. -- March 19, 2010 -- The Impeach President McCain<br /><br />movement has gained enough steam this week, on the 7th<br /><br />anniversary of U.S. involvement in Iraq, that it's now<br /><br />considered more likely than not that articles of<br /><br />impeachment will be introduced by the House Judiciary<br /><br />Committee early next month, insiders say.<br /><br /><br /><br />A bi-partisan majority in the House now agree that<br /><br />the president's secret bombing raid on the suburbs<br /><br />south of Tehran last week was the last straw and<br /><br />proof that McCain is out of control, as he conducts<br /><br />an ever-escalating and expanding war in both Iraq<br /><br />and now in Iran without so much as consulting Congress<br /><br />(in his defense, which he'll soon have to tell Judiciary,<br /><br />McCain says he can't afford to reveal American<br /><br />strategy publicly, as that would be revealing it to<br /><br />the enemy, too).<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />And all this comes a mere 16 months after McCain's<br /><br />solid electoral win over Senator Hillary Clinton in '08.<br /><br /><br /><br />Today, in 2010, the triumphant landscape of '08 seems<br /><br />distant. McCain's political capital is all gone. His<br /><br />job approval ratings in some polls are as low as 17%.<br /><br />And his increasingly surly, defiant press conferences<br /><br />tend to stoke the flames of the Impeach McCain crowd.<br /><br />Like last week when he declared, "When it comes<br /><br />to waging war, I listen to the generals, not to the<br /><br />people. The people are militarily illiterate."<br /><br /><br /><br />Dems immediately noted that President McCain was<br /><br />speaking a few blocks from a D.C. neighborhood burned<br /><br />down in the summer of '08 by rioters angered by the<br /><br />denial of the nomination to Sen. Obama -- a neighborhood<br /><br />still not rebuilt. (By the way, where is Obama now? His<br /><br />"burn, baby, burn" remark during the riots, caught by a<br /><br />sneaky reporter's hidden mic, has likely ended his<br /><br />political career for good.)<br /><br /><br /><br />One White House correspondent says McCain may<br /><br />try to head off impeachment proceedings by declaring<br /><br />early that he will not seek re-election in 2012, due to<br /><br />the recurrence of his skin cancer (which he also<br /><br />is being secretive about). But not even that<br /><br />will save his political skin if the Mahdi Army<br /><br />keeps slaughtering Americans at a clip not seen since Tet,<br /><br />because the public has clearly lost its patience with<br /><br />a war it thought was coming to a close nearly two years<br /><br />ago. McCain's latest "surge" (he seems to be addicted to surges<br /><br />these days) has only strengthened the hand of Prime Minister<br /><br />Sadr.<br /><br /><br /><br />Insiders say Vice President Romney has spoken privately<br /><br />to friends about the possibility of having to assume the<br /><br />presidency soon and appointing his own vice president<br /><br />(he is reported to have already broached the subject with<br /><br />Sen. Joe Lieberman, floating the idea of a possible<br /><br />Romney/Lieberman unity team).<br /><br /><br /><br />In any event, all this this makes Romney the clear<br /><br />front-runner for the GOP nomination in '12, if only<br /><br />because he's likely to be the incumbent by then. The<br /><br />DNC, meanwhile, is reportedly feverishly trying to<br /><br />convince Al Gore to run again, assuring him that<br /><br />he would have a clear shot at the nomination and<br /><br />that there would not be the fractious infighting<br /><br />that doomed prospects for the Dems in '08.<br /><br /><br /><br />The fact that pundits are already looking beyond the<br /><br />McCain presidency to the '12 race is a sign that Chief<br /><br />Justice Roberts may soon be swearing in the 45th president<br /><br />of the United States. But if war policy doesn't<br /><br />change dramatically, a 46th president may be taking<br /><br />office shortly after that.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />____________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for April 1, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />One of the reasons John McCain supports American<br /><br />involvement in Iraq may be that he's seriously<br /><br />uninformed about that war. In fact, he seems to<br /><br />have a shockingly casual, almost amateurish grasp<br /><br />of the basic facts about the conflict and<br /><br />its ancillary issues.<br /><br /><br /><br />I mean, there was the press conference last week<br /><br />at which McCain said:<br /><br />.<br />"Well, it's common knowledge and has been reported<br />in the media that al Qaeda is going back into Iran and<br />is receiving training and are coming back into Iraq<br />from Iran. That's well known and it's unfortunate."<br /><br /><br />Though his traveling companion, Joe Lieberman,<br /><br />immediately corrected him, McCain still revealed a<br /><br />lack of fundamental knowledge about the currents and<br /><br />cross-currents in the region.<br /><br /><br /><br />The big fear among foreign policy experts has always<br /><br />been, post-Saddam, that there might be an unholy Shiite<br /><br />alliance between Tehran and Baghdad. Is McCain also<br /><br />unaware that Saddam was an enemy of bin Laden's and<br /><br />that Saddam (for his own reasons) didn't want al Qaeda<br /><br />to gain a foothold in Iraq because he saw the group<br /><br />as a competing power base? (If we had been shrewd, we<br /><br />could have built on and exacerbated the natural<br /><br />animosity between the two.) One wonders whether<br /><br />McCain would have supported the war if he had<br /><br />been more knowledgeable about the issues involved.<br /><br /><br /><br />To his credit, though, McCain hasn't yet<br /><br />called the Sunnis "gooks." (Lieberman might<br /><br />have warned him off that one.)<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Hillary Clinton keeps using that line about answering<br /><br />the phone at 3 in the morning, but, as I recall, when<br /><br />she and her husband were in the White House, the<br /><br />president wasn't even available for phone calls<br /><br />at three in the afternoon! (Remember Bill's "sexy time"<br /><br />in the middle of a weekday, when he had guests like Lloyd<br /><br />Bentsen waiting in the lobby?) Then again, President<br /><br />Clinton gave us results (e.g., peace, prosperity), so<br /><br />maybe a bit of mid-day fellatio is part of the recipe<br /><br />for successful policy-making. Give<br /><br />me what he's drinking (just not so literally!).<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Odd that Time magazine chose to publish a ranting<br /><br />letter from Jeremiah Wright complaining about<br /><br />a story in The New York Times -- a full year<br /><br />after Wright sent the letter to the New<br /><br />York Times (which ran a fair and accurate story, by<br /><br />the way).<br /><br /><br /><br />You know, I can't see how Wright could be considered<br /><br />a very credible source these days about much of<br /><br />anything, now that his history of making crackpot<br /><br />comments has come to light.<br /><br /><br /><br />I mean, how much credence can you give a guy who says<br /><br />that "the government lied about inventing the HIV<br /><br />virus as a means of genocide against people of color"?<br /><br />It's hard to fathom the unhinged mindset of somebody<br /><br />who would say something like that.<br /><br /><br /><br />Wright's remarks recall nothing so much as Gen. Ripper's<br /><br />lunatic belief that the communists were putting fluoride in<br /><br />America's water supply in "Dr. Strangelove."<br /><br /><br /><br />Beware if Wright starts writing letters that<br /><br />mention his "precious bodily fluids."<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 29, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Lately I've been looking at the three main<br /><br />contenders for president and wondering<br /><br />whether candidates were always this flawed or<br /><br />whether I was just too young to notice the<br /><br />imperfections in previous decades.<br /><br /><br /><br />One candidate, John McCain, has an explosive temper<br /><br />and has openly used the ugly ethnic slur "chink" to<br /><br />describe Asians (he was in prison when "All in the<br /><br />Family" was in its prime, which means he missed a<br /><br />big part of America's cultural education and<br /><br />evolution).<br /><br /><br /><br />Another hopeful, Hillary Clinton, talks about<br /><br />landing under sniper fire during a trip to Bosnia<br /><br />in the 1990s. Earlier I was thinking the<br /><br />same thing that one television pundit later voiced<br /><br />on Friday night: was she confusing the Bosnia<br /><br />incident with another event in which she<br /><br />actually did come under fire? If not, then how<br /><br />does she explain the fact that she fabricated<br /><br />the incident?<br /><br /><br /><br />Finally, we have Barack Obama, who stands by a<br /><br />crazy pastor, Jeremiah Wright, who says lots of<br /><br />really idiotic things.<br /><br /><br /><br />Hey, Mike Gravel is starting to look nearly normal!<br /><br /><br /><br />Elsewhere in politics, it was also recently revealed<br /><br />that the former governor of New York whored until he<br /><br />was caught, the new guv of New York slept around and did<br /><br />cocaine, the former governor of New Jersey had threesomes,<br /><br />the mayor of Detroit was caught having steamy extramarital<br /><br />sex, McCain appears to have had a thing for that Vicki<br /><br />Iseman woman, and so on and so on.<br /><br /><br /><br />I'm starting to get the feeling that the whole world<br /><br />is having a wild Dionysian bash but forgot to invite<br /><br />me. As I sit here on a Friday night, watching the<br /><br />AccuWeather forecast and sipping Yuban, I'm beginning<br /><br />to suspect I've been thrown out of the gene pool by<br /><br />whoever controls the guest list.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, back to the flaws of the White House hopefuls,<br /><br />specifically Obama's response to the Rev. Wright<br /><br />controversy (I wrote about Hillary's Snipergate<br /><br />below, hence I'm not playing favorites).<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyone who would say "the government lied about<br /><br />inventing the HIV virus as a means of genocide<br /><br />against people of color," as Wright did, is<br /><br />seriously and dangerously out of touch with<br /><br />reality.<br /><br /><br /><br />And anyone who has the temerity to say that the<br /><br />U.S. brought the 9/11 attacks on itself (attacks<br /><br />planned by bin Laden during the progressive Clinton<br /><br />regime, when our military was actually siding with<br /><br />Muslims and against Christians in a conflict in<br /><br />the former Yugoslavia) is either stupid or<br /><br />uninformed or both.<br /><br /><br /><br />But what also bothers me is there were people<br /><br />in the audience at his church applauding all<br /><br />that crap.<br /><br /><br /><br />Why didn't Barack Obama walk out in protest when<br /><br />Wright started mouthing off like that? He should<br /><br />know there are far higher values than loyalty in this<br /><br />world. If Wright were a good friend of mine, I<br /><br />would say, no friend of mine would be talking like<br /><br />that, and I'd walk out in the middle of<br /><br />his sermon and loudly tell people afterwards<br /><br />that I strongly disagreed with what he said.<br /><br /><br /><br />It's like sitting around with an old friend who<br /><br />suddenly starts disparaging blacks and Jews; you<br /><br />don't let it pass; you stop him right there and<br /><br />make it clear that's not acceptable talk.<br /><br /><br /><br />That's why Barack's speech on race was one<br /><br />of his worst. It sounded so Adlai, so Taubman<br /><br />building, so no-controlling-legal-authority.<br /><br />What I didn't hear was genuine, visceral<br /><br />revulsion at Wright's rants. I didn't see the<br /><br />profile in courage of someone willing to take a<br /><br />solitary, principled, "High Noon" stand and<br /><br />walk out on both a friend who said the n-word<br /><br />and the people who laughed when he said it.<br /><br /><br /><br />The speech on race sounded like Obama's exit<br /><br />interview -- just as Romney's hyped speech on<br /><br />Mormonism felt like an exit. Don't get me wrong,<br /><br />Barack will probably be the nominee, but it was<br /><br />an exit speech in the sense that we all now<br /><br />know -- and so does he, at least unconsciously -- that<br /><br />he is not going to be elected president in<br /><br />November. No way, no how. Clip this, save this,<br /><br />put it on your frig, and tell me I'm wrong on<br /><br />the morning of November 5th.<br /><br /><br /><br />And don't tell me about all the national polls<br /><br />that have him leading McCain by however many points;<br /><br />instead show me one credible independent poll that<br /><br />has Obama leading McCain in Florida. Or in Ohio.<br /><br />Or even Wisconsin. Without those states,<br /><br />he can't possibly win the electoral tally.<br /><br /><br /><br />By the way, Wright: the murders of 9/11 were<br /><br />done for religious reasons, which is to say for<br /><br />irrational motives (see: the letter<br /><br />of intent found in the luggage of Mohamed Atta,<br /><br />full of a lot of religious mumbo jumbo about<br /><br />the way and the light and the path and nonbelievers<br /><br />and god and other such junk).<br /><br /><br /><br />Later on, of course, months after the fact, bin<br /><br />Laden ladled on political reasons for having<br /><br />committed the 9/11 massacres, but only<br /><br />when he discovered the attacks weren't playing<br /><br />so well in the Muslim mainstream.<br /><br /><br /><br />I wonder if there's a clip somewhere of Wright<br /><br />screaming, "God damn bin Laden!," and of Barack<br /><br />applauding when he said that.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />______________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 25-26, 2008<br /><br /><br />Intriguing but flawed story in today's<br /><br />New York Times about East Germans escaping to freedom<br /><br />during the Cold War by traveling to Bulgaria and<br /><br />slipping across its border into Greece. The story<br /><br />fails to note that Bulgaria is widely<br /><br />and definitively known as having been among the<br /><br />most -- if not the most -- totalitarian and brutal<br /><br />of the Eastern Bloc nations (in fact, insiders used<br /><br />to call it the 16th republic of the CCCP).<br /><br /><br /><br />I'm surprised his editor allowed him to write it<br /><br />without noting the country's overall Cold<br /><br />War reputation. (Further, his story has the<br /><br />unmistakable sound of a piece that a writer<br /><br />writes when he subtly wants to even up a<br /><br />score with another writer.)<br /><br /><br /><br />It also quotes someone characterizing Bulgaria as<br /><br />sunny and southern, which gives the wrong impression.<br /><br />Yes, the small part of it that is near the Black Sea may be<br /><br />a vacation spot, but that's not the bulk of Bulgaria, which<br /><br />is mostly grey and drab and sober and insular and<br /><br />super-provincial -- and not a lot of fun at all. And<br /><br />any look at an atlas would tell you that it's<br /><br />on the same latitude as New England (Sofia almost<br /><br />never gets above 75 degrees, even in August).<br /><br /><br /><br />As I've noted in this space before, I traveled through<br /><br />Bulgaria (alone, by local train, as a<br /><br />teenager in 1976) from its Serbian border to Sofia<br /><br />through Plovdiv and to Edirne, which is the virtual<br /><br />three-way intersection of Bulgaria, Turkey and<br /><br />Greece (aka, Thrace).<br /><br /><br /><br />And then I did it again in the reverse direction!<br /><br /><br />My impressions: it felt like a military state, as<br /><br />opposed to a police state, which is what Yugoslavia<br /><br />resembled. Its border with Serbia was a bit less<br /><br />protected than the one at Edirne, a somewhat<br /><br />scary checkpoint in that soliders rifled roughly<br /><br />through passengers's luggage while wielding their<br /><br />rifles and flashlights/spotlights in<br /><br />intimidating ways.<br /><br /><br /><br />In any event, it was sure easier to get <em>into</em><br /><br />Bulgaria from the Edirne checkpoint than it was<br /><br />to get out. The border guards were far less uptight<br /><br />(I didn't even have a double transit visa, required for<br /><br />the return trip, but they bent the rules and sold me<br /><br />one on the spot, enabling me to get back to Italy,<br /><br />where I was studying at the time.)<br /><br /><br /><br />As for the reverse journey from Bulgaria to Serbia,<br /><br />through Dimitrovgrad, I mostly slept through it because<br /><br />I'd become very sick on the train, probably because of<br /><br />food poisoning at an Istanbul restaurant.<br /><br /><br /><br />Frankly, I was more worried about returning through<br /><br />Zagreb, where, days earlier, I'd been taken off<br /><br />the train, stripped of my passport and briefly detained<br /><br />by Yugoslavian cops (because I had an American passport).<br /><br /><br /><br />In Bulgaria, I had no such personal encounter with the<br /><br />authorities, though I had been taking notes and snapping<br /><br />pictures at various points along the route, which might<br /><br />have been considered provocative if they had caught me<br /><br />doing it. In retrospect, I can see I was probably<br /><br />simply lucky not to have had a run-in with the<br /><br />Bulgarian border soldiers, who truly looked<br /><br />and acted like serious motherfuckers.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_____________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 25, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong><br />Stream of Hillary ("Can You Hear the Drums, Fernando?")<br /></strong><br /><br /><br />The snipers are out again tonight, shooting from the nearby<br /><br />hills as part of a vast right-wing conspiracy, reminding<br /><br />me of that night in Memphis when I was with Rev. Martin<br /><br />Luther King, who I first met at age six -- and I have seven<br /><br />paid campaign workers who will back me up thoroughly on this,<br /><br />because I did see King when I was 12 and was the only<br /><br />Barry Goldwater supporter in the joint when he spoke -- and<br /><br />by the way I misspoke about meeting King at 6, I've been<br /><br />distracted by snipers lately, coming at me from different<br /><br />directions, giving me the vapors, reminding me I've seen<br /><br />some "hard places come down in smoke and ash" in my 50<br /><br />years as U.S. Senator, and, yes, I have the scars to prove<br /><br />it, because Bill First once had me in a death grip on the<br /><br />Senate floor as Trent Lott sniped at me with what looked like<br /><br />a Confederate-era pistol from an upper floor, and suddenly<br /><br />I flashbacked to that night in Memphis when I was at<br /><br />King's side, presciently advising Jesse Jackson to drop<br /><br />out of the South Carolina primary, but I digress and<br /><br />should note that, if anything, I have had too much<br /><br />foreign policy experience, having taken the SeaDream Cruise<br /><br />of the Caribbean during spring break in college, coming<br /><br />within 200 miles of Cuba and its snipers, and I don't<br /><br />want to cry, but I really sincerely -- and this comes<br /><br />from the heart -- I sincerely hate to lose, particularly<br /><br />to a one-term Senator from Illinois, who stands in contrast<br /><br />to my 53 years of Congressional experience, if you include<br /><br />the times in my youth when I would walk by the Capitol<br /><br />building late at night, a dangerous neighborhood with<br /><br />potential snipers on rooftops -- experience that should<br /><br />count for something, as should my experience as the<br /><br />right-hand of Rev. King, who I cradled in my arms<br /><br />in '68 on the balcony of that motel in Memphis, which<br /><br />is in a state that has 11 electoral votes that I might<br /><br />win if I become the nominee, though it looks like Barack<br /><br />has it wrapped, and if he does win the nomination, I'll offer<br /><br />him the second spot on the ticket, and I'll say, "I want<br /><br />you by my side Barack, in case of snipers and to hear<br /><br />my remembrances of Dr. King" -- but I must cut this short,<br /><br />because I think I hear Kalishnikovs in the nearby hills,<br /><br />I can hear the drums, Fernando, I can still "recall the<br /><br />frightful night we crossed the Rio Grande," or it might have<br /><br />been the Danube, or maybe the East River on the way to Zabar's.<br /><br /><br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 19, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>Today's Anti-War Protests in Berkeley, Calif. </strong><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim20VUpBNFrdqttOofAMwTu0f8CzHgnbkYgoFqsn6vgYusGQQxXvaNaF2kT1e-NpV3sFWq5zqqFvbgnAqJEJtT_knGYnEXxdBF0MTooVjUwlbUvj-DOXnA93HokW1DhOShOgKUCqPzZBs/s1600-h/scaniraqbest.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179580934684754066" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim20VUpBNFrdqttOofAMwTu0f8CzHgnbkYgoFqsn6vgYusGQQxXvaNaF2kT1e-NpV3sFWq5zqqFvbgnAqJEJtT_knGYnEXxdBF0MTooVjUwlbUvj-DOXnA93HokW1DhOShOgKUCqPzZBs/s400/scaniraqbest.jpg" /></a><br /><em>A spirited group of protesters on Telegraph Avenue,<br />around 1:30pm today. [photo by Paul Iorio] </em><br /><br /><br /><br />Five years after the start of the Iraq war, anti-war<br /><br />demonstators took to the streets of cities across<br /><br />America -- and Berkeley, Calif., the traditional<br /><br />epicenter of protest, was no exception.<br /><br /><br /><br />Here are a few photos I shot around a couple<br /><br />hours ago in Berkeley.<br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgP7tFkbpQDKG-XNNYnwYfXmGA7tLM8UMsv0SBR-7ZESSNhJ1kAiol88zyd0zODZObKG3heZtAVUaFjc31YaKEHNAVMkmtiqlEoUMAj3bvzo5LPSPdEBPxM5-rOTXQA5ThZmT6lt-kuM0/s1600-h/scaniraqsecondbest.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179587368545763490" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgP7tFkbpQDKG-XNNYnwYfXmGA7tLM8UMsv0SBR-7ZESSNhJ1kAiol88zyd0zODZObKG3heZtAVUaFjc31YaKEHNAVMkmtiqlEoUMAj3bvzo5LPSPdEBPxM5-rOTXQA5ThZmT6lt-kuM0/s400/scaniraqsecondbest.jpg" /></a><br /><em><br />Another shot of the Telegraph Avenue<br />protesters. [photo by Paul Iorio]</em>.<br /><br />* *<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTR0N_cF100NG7KLAI_jPZUXrBPRdQTegwUFx2si0BXbTgjeIzaZg8QA1obWXM9iMgd0-jEH63BmkTeTQasnkT8mNvlZE47r3BP1_0HKL_SeHQgp4EG1GfP6jTFW5HDUqMmUCtQ-CVhoA/s1600-h/scaniraqthirdbest.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5179589546094182578" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTR0N_cF100NG7KLAI_jPZUXrBPRdQTegwUFx2si0BXbTgjeIzaZg8QA1obWXM9iMgd0-jEH63BmkTeTQasnkT8mNvlZE47r3BP1_0HKL_SeHQgp4EG1GfP6jTFW5HDUqMmUCtQ-CVhoA/s400/scaniraqthirdbest.jpg" /></a><br /><em>A contingent of demonstrators on Shattuck<br />Avenue, after 2pm today. [photo by Paul Iorio]</em><br /><br /><br />--------------------<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Now it emerges in a newly released audiotape that bin Laden's<br /><br />delicate sensitivites are still offended by the little<br /><br />cartoons that satirists in Europe published a couple<br /><br />years ago. What a fragle flower this bin Laden<br /><br />fellow is, no? People jump burning from the twin towers,<br /><br />and bin is unmoved. But bin sees an episode of<br /><br />Huckleberry Hound and he's in tears. Awww.<br /><br /><br /><br />Well, bin, if ya liked the the Mohammed cartoons,<br /><br />you're really gonna like my own cartoon series, "Bin Laden,<br /><br />the Jihadist Pooch," which (much to my surprise) has<br /><br />spread virally over the Internet since I posted the<br /><br />series last October. Perhaps you've already seen the<br /><br />cartoons. But if not, lemme take this opportunity to<br /><br />reprint the best of the series right here and now.<br /><br />Viddy well and enjoy!<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0hLcbzDB-Yd7ZVP-fzeGttmxzqcEycKocWVk24ujTlUFVpKD7oLatTiTx_nQh_YxEMCjzQOBWbql521GuJlbsuZwdVWeKJ4C25_C5dZg8npWDbdLBiIq3ltbbRJoePz6mn767PFWRVIw/s1600-h/scanpoochtitle.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5115115614333803826" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0hLcbzDB-Yd7ZVP-fzeGttmxzqcEycKocWVk24ujTlUFVpKD7oLatTiTx_nQh_YxEMCjzQOBWbql521GuJlbsuZwdVWeKJ4C25_C5dZg8npWDbdLBiIq3ltbbRJoePz6mn767PFWRVIw/s400/scanpoochtitle.jpg" /></a><br /><br />Series by Paul Iorio.<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcmacZcUVUKQDpq7yOfnyXw5GI3T0m1l7CmNNBAwoj29gvA-qGyX3fQSKKWjlkQ2oXNt_xFIvjyrdBnPNAK0sgENvmmLtasFfnRZEI1TJ0JF_ovrHhB0KD2WYVfXG9rfZiJ3EBX7_zJGA/s1600-h/scanpoochatta.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114360456003951826" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcmacZcUVUKQDpq7yOfnyXw5GI3T0m1l7CmNNBAwoj29gvA-qGyX3fQSKKWjlkQ2oXNt_xFIvjyrdBnPNAK0sgENvmmLtasFfnRZEI1TJ0JF_ovrHhB0KD2WYVfXG9rfZiJ3EBX7_zJGA/s400/scanpoochatta.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFauB2cmc92OUDyEIlPcRNHYRh2eofvU0_L7ymkMplOxSCObytOQJWm3edDwi2yKW2MLy5EiB5AuYoksyrsLsIElgLJNb_njP1xvRpnfOmid7i3ZlSbVt4J010CGQuA7CycsSdOE1RKgg/s1600-h/scanPOOCHBURNING.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5180907177636085954" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFauB2cmc92OUDyEIlPcRNHYRh2eofvU0_L7ymkMplOxSCObytOQJWm3edDwi2yKW2MLy5EiB5AuYoksyrsLsIElgLJNb_njP1xvRpnfOmid7i3ZlSbVt4J010CGQuA7CycsSdOE1RKgg/s400/scanPOOCHBURNING.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivcbUhgBvifhujADipErRKeUGxyNN2BApOTRkcHwFO36_7rCu0VlYATQKG2B8BAwmZ0AC2wRRPAmenbcxnXOxQLn6fgpkuFboobJyOHtBrvW7tOrVogeumFEQgblKgrM4MZz852ei8W8s/s1600-h/scanpoochbathe.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114345466568088770" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEivcbUhgBvifhujADipErRKeUGxyNN2BApOTRkcHwFO36_7rCu0VlYATQKG2B8BAwmZ0AC2wRRPAmenbcxnXOxQLn6fgpkuFboobJyOHtBrvW7tOrVogeumFEQgblKgrM4MZz852ei8W8s/s400/scanpoochbathe.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVcnlUSBS0LqOgkJDLE03F8G6XOlEDQ6eiHEv_4CDHpj2vKuD_E9Z5t30T1KqPhnC7jAS88T-CSjN3wcICObaIgh8C6lc-kdVdPLM7Aqnz1sQ_PorumLo_G_ytnPEqSPpu5pRc0UdQYEY/s1600-h/scanpoochwarverses.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5116405861164227938" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhVcnlUSBS0LqOgkJDLE03F8G6XOlEDQ6eiHEv_4CDHpj2vKuD_E9Z5t30T1KqPhnC7jAS88T-CSjN3wcICObaIgh8C6lc-kdVdPLM7Aqnz1sQ_PorumLo_G_ytnPEqSPpu5pRc0UdQYEY/s400/scanpoochwarverses.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1_ZnTa8e6BOIyZY5kQcjs6jgyrA7BpQDzBzeNseZCMUGAjjb0dmzkugq2R5lrrJfiPw8nA7i-O40i1yDaAC2HMySMVLn-m5WUC6Dz4P1Wg9eJpKLlPFFar8I-unAY8PkRe3euRnSyDpg/s1600-h/scanbinladenpooch1.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114236894089813090" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1_ZnTa8e6BOIyZY5kQcjs6jgyrA7BpQDzBzeNseZCMUGAjjb0dmzkugq2R5lrrJfiPw8nA7i-O40i1yDaAC2HMySMVLn-m5WUC6Dz4P1Wg9eJpKLlPFFar8I-unAY8PkRe3euRnSyDpg/s400/scanbinladenpooch1.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUdccIURpX7UEW1UUf1_jKgUXLQSNlJ8xAb1gCY6gXsCBPmBeN-3EfPJLs97mb-bCsdoMwdWWuxp5rUJyqj_c2L-18Kk4bDWRK-fEHJyz6DVfIEGerFB6aIwU_FoT-QInCvKN8ufP-tGs/s1600-h/scanwahabism.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5115107337931824402" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUdccIURpX7UEW1UUf1_jKgUXLQSNlJ8xAb1gCY6gXsCBPmBeN-3EfPJLs97mb-bCsdoMwdWWuxp5rUJyqj_c2L-18Kk4bDWRK-fEHJyz6DVfIEGerFB6aIwU_FoT-QInCvKN8ufP-tGs/s400/scanwahabism.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVSJ1WxgUw_KNeEhPfk_wjkJlqbwKA-sIz9HsCghdqHYGcVljgl33zARW36XYDcYNsFtjoJqyadtNRLsK4KkosVMAZBI1ZbU8fDNSqR6N_HppJwZzKPWXgzGh1Z8NDucP8umaY-qfpBzQ/s1600-h/scanbinladenpooch9.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114237392306019442" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVSJ1WxgUw_KNeEhPfk_wjkJlqbwKA-sIz9HsCghdqHYGcVljgl33zARW36XYDcYNsFtjoJqyadtNRLsK4KkosVMAZBI1ZbU8fDNSqR6N_HppJwZzKPWXgzGh1Z8NDucP8umaY-qfpBzQ/s400/scanbinladenpooch9.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMirD5sPLRRJn7LTJXkvHelIZuGdeIgrf8aCw9Vk2Q61oRGBv_xV2woagCnp4oKkI81G_dQM4TjBYYbUNbyM3S_HXqmEkixnIwDAP-SfPHuVlj_ryM6t-EujmJLxW79wuQww3E9bjR41Q/s1600-h/scanpooch9a.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114247021622697090" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMirD5sPLRRJn7LTJXkvHelIZuGdeIgrf8aCw9Vk2Q61oRGBv_xV2woagCnp4oKkI81G_dQM4TjBYYbUNbyM3S_HXqmEkixnIwDAP-SfPHuVlj_ryM6t-EujmJLxW79wuQww3E9bjR41Q/s400/scanpooch9a.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxAtOL08y46Sj28eH2oNUlMddpyoBgNwnf0hUqHtxPZhe4foUyTAYP0D84xbCbxDF-mDJdK8BfBpuM8ReG8QV9WtaXbaLyW0kMCZA1H5LTG4AC7mgY6CI_xc6DgzwdeS8kI2TcFbjfpRY/s1600-h/scan0005POOCH9B.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114268144271858834" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxAtOL08y46Sj28eH2oNUlMddpyoBgNwnf0hUqHtxPZhe4foUyTAYP0D84xbCbxDF-mDJdK8BfBpuM8ReG8QV9WtaXbaLyW0kMCZA1H5LTG4AC7mgY6CI_xc6DgzwdeS8kI2TcFbjfpRY/s400/scan0005POOCH9B.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGHDanQ5dLEmG-o5GM6rFk8sUN_ACVfrgL9bzfdoYux99QokF7ReKksQaeUKY_8bl3sCohThBDtLr-mlaKxw0XDlnoDoUXP5691EAu12MOj0pQ9u0EtuHM2JJO4HnXHQPzrpFe-S1T3GE/s1600-h/scanPOOCHBAR.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114327006798650546" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGHDanQ5dLEmG-o5GM6rFk8sUN_ACVfrgL9bzfdoYux99QokF7ReKksQaeUKY_8bl3sCohThBDtLr-mlaKxw0XDlnoDoUXP5691EAu12MOj0pQ9u0EtuHM2JJO4HnXHQPzrpFe-S1T3GE/s400/scanPOOCHBAR.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtCCCDl8CUf9wIJVCTT2ZsET7EWg8Tl5ZUnb1v4tFTWxnsmuPOr5VbCGgot8Z2bvDs9fhRUp4QcQyOWObvF8MtVhyqnszdBrbIxcskoGhvEmzbOu7f7KgE8_ReAobK3yRuWtkwJSOIdsU/s1600-h/scanPOOCH2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5114269157884140706" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtCCCDl8CUf9wIJVCTT2ZsET7EWg8Tl5ZUnb1v4tFTWxnsmuPOr5VbCGgot8Z2bvDs9fhRUp4QcQyOWObvF8MtVhyqnszdBrbIxcskoGhvEmzbOu7f7KgE8_ReAobK3yRuWtkwJSOIdsU/s400/scanPOOCH2.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPpYJMIgm0FCpAuJpVCbTNZKdppCfPMfMg2D8RnFBSo-S26yiEg4AxIBeGBDlBQiku5sWS_xEBlSBRD8K0nDy1Gi7lQUs1dFiWk6ITUEB6tNn3mGJKp_ua8C1zUs6PxcOHNycNJZziAGE/s1600-h/scanpoochpress.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5115096188196723970" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPpYJMIgm0FCpAuJpVCbTNZKdppCfPMfMg2D8RnFBSo-S26yiEg4AxIBeGBDlBQiku5sWS_xEBlSBRD8K0nDy1Gi7lQUs1dFiWk6ITUEB6tNn3mGJKp_ua8C1zUs6PxcOHNycNJZziAGE/s400/scanpoochpress.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 18-19, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Race and the '08 Campaign</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />Well, the good news for the Dems is they're going<br /><br />to win the White House -- in 2012. President McCain<br /><br />will announce in late 2011 that he won't seek a second<br /><br />term (because of health issues), leaving the field<br /><br />open to Dems ravenous for a long-denied<br /><br />victory.<br /><br /><br /><br />So the Dems should set their sights on '12 and in the<br /><br />meantime fix the holes in their nominating process<br /><br />that perennially give rise to factional candidates who<br /><br />simply can't cut it in the general election.<br /><br /><br /><br />The Super Delegates invention was supposed to do just<br /><br />that, but instead comes across as an imperious imposition<br /><br />by national party insiders. Maybe Dems ought to<br /><br />experiment with truly new ideas -- such as (off the top of<br /><br />my head): having double primaries. What I mean is,<br /><br />follow the New Hampshire primary on Tuesday and with<br /><br />a mail-in New Hampshire primary on Thursday that pits<br /><br />the two top contenders (who won Tuesday's vote) against<br /><br />one another, with delegates going to the winner of<br /><br />Thursday's vote, winner-take-all. (The other primary<br /><br />states could do the same.) That way, whoever<br /><br />progresses to front-runner status becomes front-runner<br /><br />with a 50%-plus majority, not with, say, a 27% plurality.<br /><br />The 27% plurality thing is what's keeping the Dems from<br /><br />nominating an electable general election candidate.<br /><br /><br /><br />The comparisons of Barack's juggernaut to Jesse Jackson's<br /><br />presidential campaigns of the 1980s don't really obtain,<br /><br />because Jackson was never as popular as Barack is now.<br /><br />Rather Barack's candidacy is starting to resemble<br /><br />George Wallace's run in '72, which Wallace probably<br /><br />would've won, much to the extreme chagrin of party<br /><br />regulars, if there hadn't been tragedy on the<br /><br />campaign trail.<br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, the general election is taking on a<br /><br />different shape altogether, looking increasingly like<br /><br />Adlai versus Ike, circa '56 or '52 -- take your pick.<br /><br /><br /><br />And Rev. Wright just finished cutting McCain's Halloween<br /><br />scare ad for the swing states. The GOP now doesn't<br /><br />have to find some obscure footage of Obama and Sharpton<br /><br />embracing; it need only run Wright's "God Damn America!"<br /><br />clip on a loop in the purple states on the weekend<br /><br />before the general election.<br /><br /><br /><br />In order to believe Obama will become our 44th president,<br /><br />one must be convinced that he can win Florida and Ohio, or<br /><br />at least Florida or Ohio, and I don't see how he could<br /><br />win either. (If there is a credible poll that puts him<br /><br />over McCain in either state, please send it to me at<br /><br />pliorio@aol.com, because I've not seen it.)<br /><br /><br /><br />Don't get me wrong, if Obama's the nominee, he will<br /><br />likely win more states than Mondale or McGovern or<br /><br />even George Wallace -- his electoral total will probably<br /><br />be even bigger than Michael Dukakis's, though only<br /><br />slightly.<br /><br /><br /><br />You know, around a week or so ago, before Rev. Wright's<br /><br />sermon came to light, I saw some elementary school<br /><br />kids -- black kids -- cheerfully walking on a sidewalk<br /><br />as a car passed with an Obama for President bumper<br /><br />sticker on it, and for a moment I had a sort of heartwarming,<br /><br />almost corny, but genuine thought: their first memories<br /><br />of a presidential election will be this one, in which<br /><br />an African-American candidate is the leading Democratic<br /><br />contender for the nomination. They will not know a world,<br /><br />first-hand, in which blacks are prima facie excluded from<br /><br />the top job in the land.<br /><br /><br /><br />But the glow of that thought lasted only until the<br /><br />Rev. Wright incident, which reminded me there<br /><br />is still sickness and infection on both sides of<br /><br />the racial divide.<br /><br /><br /><br />As testament to that, one of the biggest issues that<br /><br />is not even being discussed in the campaign (because<br /><br />it's too incendiary) is legal reform to correct the<br /><br />injustices that we've recently seen against both blacks<br /><br />(in Jena) and against whites (in the Crystal Mangum<br /><br />defamation case).<br /><br /><br /><br />The Jena case points to a need for tort reform that<br /><br />somehow takes into account the overarching context of<br /><br />a crime (a reform that should go beyond the existing<br /><br />"mitigating factor" standard).<br /><br /><br /><br />The Duke case points to a horrifying hole in our legal<br /><br />system that should be remedied by de-politicizing the<br /><br />position of D.A., creating a serious penalty for<br /><br />intentional aggravated slander (though this one would be<br /><br />tough to pull off without infringing on 1st amendment<br /><br />rights), understanding how serious the crime of false<br /><br />accusation can be, etc.<br /><br /><br /><br />Duke and Jena should both be exposed to the<br /><br />disinfectant of sunlight in this campaign, otherwise<br /><br />the infection on both sides of the racial divide will<br /><br />continue to fester, and we'll continue to hear the<br /><br />hate talk of the Rev. Wrights and the Bill<br /><br />Cunninghams.<br /><br />--------------------------<br /><br /><br />Stray thought: Of all the women I've known who<br /><br />have changed their last names since college or<br /><br />high school, I can think of only a few who have<br /><br />changed it completely, without even hyphenating it.<br /><br />So is the tradition of name-changing now mostly<br /><br />a thing of the Boratian past? If we elect Clinton, might<br /><br />she decide to turn into President Rodham somewhere<br /><br />down the line?<br /><br /><br />-----------<br /><br /><br />OK, time to break for lunch and have a hamburger. Yes,<br /><br />I've heard about how risky beef is this days, but frankly<br /><br />a certain burger looks so good right about now I could eat<br /><br />it all day, E. coli or not!<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 10, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Alan Dershowitz said it best, in Byron Pitts'<br /><br />excellent report (does Pitts ever do anything but<br /><br />excellent reports?) on "The CBS Evening News":<br /><br />in most countries, what Eliot Spitzer did would<br /><br />not even be illegal. Spitzer was about to have sex<br /><br />(again) with an adult woman behind closed doors,<br /><br />which is really his own personal business and not<br /><br />ours (unlike Larry Craig, who was planning to<br /><br />have sex in a public restroom with someone who<br /><br />could have been underage, for all he knew). Sure,<br /><br />there's an element of hypocrisy in both cases,<br /><br />but that's not a hanging offense. I've always<br /><br />thought we'd be a better nation if we had the<br /><br />prostitution laws of Holland (and the health care<br /><br />system of Canada!), but for now America is stuck<br /><br />with its Puritanism and sexual provincialism, which<br /><br />I hope doesn't claim another victim in Spitzer, who<br /><br />should remain in Albany.<br /><br /><br /><br />Still, it's becoming an unmistakable pattern:<br /><br />politicians and others who codemn sexual deviance the<br /><br />loudest are often those who are involved in such<br /><br />activities themselves.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 9, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />I'm told Scarlett Johansson has recorded an<br /><br />album of Tom Waits covers, "Anywhere I Lay<br /><br />My Head," which'll be out in May and oughta<br /><br />be interesting. Haven't heard it yet, but it's<br /><br />amazing what -- at only age 23 -- she's already<br /><br />accomplished in movies. She also appears<br /><br />in will.i.am's pro-Obama video, "Yes, We Can,"<br /><br />directed nicely by Jesse Dylan (son of<br /><br />you-know-who). Great to see that Jesse has<br /><br />become a successful film director, by the way;<br /><br />I've only seen him in person once -- albeit,<br /><br />in a very memorable setting, on a boat on which<br /><br />ZZ Top was performing for a few dozen people or so<br /><br />on the 4th of July in 1986. We were docked in<br /><br />New York harbor, and I remember walking to a<br /><br />side of the boat to take a look at the Statue of<br /><br />Liberty, sidling next to a couple. "Doesn't she<br /><br />make you weak in the knees?," said the woman to<br /><br />her friend, referring to the Statue. And when<br /><br />she turned her head I saw it was Martha Quinn,<br /><br />the pioneering MTV VJ who I think every<br /><br />twentysomething guy had a crush on in 1986. With<br /><br />her was a guy who looked like a charismatic rock<br /><br />star but who I didn't recognize; later I was told<br /><br />he was Jesse Dylan. But I didn't get to meet him.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />There may be some talented editors at HarperCollins<br /><br />but I've never met one, though I have come in contact<br /><br />with some exceedingly dim editors there.<br /><br /><br /><br />Now comes word from The New York Times that<br /><br />HarperCollins is publishing a new book by James<br /><br />Frey -- you know, the guy who made stuff up in<br /><br />a non-fiction book, abused the trust of his<br /><br />editors and readers, etc.<br /><br /><br /><br />Doesn't surprise me. A couple years back, I had<br /><br />dealings with HarperCollins and saw first-hand how<br /><br />profoundly stupid some of their decisions were.<br /><br />I was writing a biography of Richard Pryor and interviewed<br /><br />a source, corroborated by other info, who said Pryor<br /><br />had done, uh, xyz some decades ago. An editor at<br /><br />HarperCollins, through my agent, said<br /><br />great, write it up as a sample chapter about Pryor<br /><br />doing xyz. So I did. When the editor received it, he<br /><br />suddenly pretended to be shocked -- shocked -- that I<br /><br />had written that Pryor had done xyz. I told the dolt,<br /><br />that's what you requested and that's what my info<br /><br />was, so that's what I wrote. (Did he want me to<br /><br />cover-up the info I'd uncovered?)<br /><br /><br /><br />Well, he didn't really have a comeback for that. What<br /><br />probably happened is that a top boss at the company<br /><br />read the xyz thing and was shocked, and so my<br /><br />editor suddenly had to appear shocked, too, even though he<br /><br />had requested exactly that material.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, people wonder why people don't read anymore,<br /><br />but I don't wonder. There's far, far more enduring value and<br /><br />artistry in a single episode of "Friday Night Lights" or "The<br /><br />Sopranos" than in most of the novels released by HarperCollins<br /><br />in a given season. As for James Frey, I fell asleep<br /><br />reading "A Million Little Pieces" even before the book<br /><br />was exposed as a fraud.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />The San Francisco Chronicle has yet another new<br /><br />editor, a guy named Ward Bushee, who will need all<br /><br />the luck he can get to save the struggling paper.<br /><br />With the newspaper business collapsing almost<br /><br />everywhere, my suggestion to Bushee is this: discontinue<br /><br />the paper edition of the paper and publish it just<br /><br />as an online daily. (That's where the industry is<br /><br />going to be in ten years anyway, and here's your chance<br /><br />to get there first.) And then I'd fire two features<br /><br />editors who've been screwing up: David Wiegand, who<br /><br />is a fraud, and Ed Guthmann, who is a thief.<br /><br />(And this is coming from someone who wrote for the<br /><br />paper for years.)<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 7, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>An Alternate Penalty for Florida and Michigan</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />If there is no penalty for Florida and Michigan<br /><br />moving up their primaries in violation of Democratic<br /><br />party rules, then in 2012 there will be no disincentive<br /><br />for other states to do the same. Suppose<br /><br />Alabama wanted to be a playa and moved its primary<br /><br />to, say, Thanksgiving of 2011, and Vermont leap-frogged<br /><br />Alabama and moved its own contest to Halloween, causing<br /><br />Iowa to protect its first-in-the-nation<br /><br />status by having its caucus on Columbus Day.<br /><br /><br /><br />If there is no penalty, then there will be no order to<br /><br />the nominating process, and the national party will not<br /><br />be able to ensure that its grand design and overall<br /><br />strategy are respected.<br /><br /><br /><br />So the question becomes: what should the penalty<br /><br />be for Michigan and Florida?<br /><br /><br /><br />Stripping them of their delegates may be a little<br /><br />harsh -- and counter-productive, too, given that<br /><br />the general election may hinge on a handful of voters<br /><br />in either Florida or Michigan. The DNC's retaliation<br /><br />shouldn't be scattershot in a way that affects<br /><br />innocent voters along with the party insiders who<br /><br />should be punished.<br /><br /><br /><br />My suggestion is to make the penalty an inside baseball<br /><br />thing. The DNC should say nobody at this year's Democratic<br /><br />National Convention from Florida or Michigan will be<br /><br />allowed to give the keynote or nominating speeches (or<br /><br />any other formal speeches from the podium). That way the<br /><br />punishment is limited to the politicians guilty of<br /><br />violating the rules.<br /><br /><br /><br />Regarding the idea of a do-over vote:<br /><br /><br />Hillary has said, why don't we do a do-over in just<br /><br />Michigan, where Barack wasn't on the ballot, but not<br /><br />in Florida, where he was.<br /><br /><br /><br />But that's not really fair because Hillary campaigned in<br /><br />Florida and Barack did not.<br /><br /><br />The big question is: why did Hillary campaign in<br /><br />Florida when she knew and agreed that that primary<br /><br />would not count? Barack honored the boycott; Hillary<br /><br />didn't. Her campaigning in Florida back in January<br /><br />implies a disingenuousness about her support of that<br /><br />boycott; in other words, there is the appearance that<br /><br />she was cynically figuring all along that the Florida<br /><br />vote would have to eventually count (if only because<br /><br />she planned to make a stink about disenfranchisement<br /><br />later on, as she's doing now).<br /><br /><br /><br />Because she appears to have unfairly manipulated the<br /><br />boycott to her advantage (by campaigning in Florida),<br /><br />any do-over should include both Michigan and Florida.<br /><br />And the penalty should affect the insiders,<br /><br />not the voters.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 5, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Hold the Seltzer, Please</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />One thing that bothers me about the Margaret<br /><br />Seltzer scandal is that it should've been<br /><br />easy to figure out long ago. I mean, here's a<br /><br />synopsis of the fraudulent book (as quoted by the<br /><br />Washington Post):<br /><br /><br />It's "about her life as a half-white, half-Native<br /><br />American girl growing up in South-Central Los Angeles<br /><br />as a foster child among gang-bangers, running drugs<br /><br />for the Bloods."<br /><br /><br /><br />Hey, that almost sounds like a laugh line on Letterman!<br /><br /><br /><br />Seriously, folks, some mysteries can be solved by<br /><br />simple common sense. For example, if Joe Schmo claims<br /><br />to have written, say, Allen Ginsberg's "Howl," and<br /><br />yet Schmo's own work is far, far less excellent<br /><br />than "Howl," then one can conclude that Schmmo must<br /><br />be lying about having written "Howl."<br /><br /><br /><br />Another thing that disturbs me about the Seltzer<br /><br />affair is that while the book publishing biz was busy<br /><br />falling for her outrageous lies, while the industry<br /><br />and reviewers and agents were absolutely<br /><br />abuzz about this untrue story that they wanted to be<br /><br />true, they were rejecting a lot of terrific,<br /><br />honest manuscripts -- including my own proposal<br /><br />for a fresh, expert bio of Richard Pryor, and for a<br /><br />solid anthology of my own non-fiction stories<br /><br />(now available online at www.paulliorio.blogspot.com).<br /><br /><br /><br />Same thing bothered me about the Jayson<br /><br />Blair scandal. Sure, I greatly appreciate the<br /><br />fact I was given the opportunity to write stories<br /><br />for the New York Times in the 1990s (and I hope<br /><br />I can do so again in the future).<br /><br /><br /><br />But when the Blair scandal erupted, one of my<br /><br />thoughts was: while Blair was fabricating stories<br /><br />that wouldn't have been any good even if they had<br /><br />been true, I was pitching several stories to The Times,<br /><br />among them a groundbreaking piece on J.D. Salinger,<br /><br />that the paper rejected (see story at<br /><br />www.pauliorio.blogspot.com, and judge for yourself).<br /><br />The paper was apparently too busy publishing Blair to give<br /><br />me a fair hearing.<br /><br /><br /><br />At the same time Blair was fabricating, I wrote a<br /><br />very well-received (and scrupulously accurate)<br /><br />media piece that still stands as the only story<br /><br />about the tv networks's immediate coverage of<br /><br />the 9/11 attacks. The Times rejected that story<br /><br />(and others) for no good reason (The Toronto Star<br /><br />ultimately ran it, and I thank that paper profusely;<br /><br />the story can also be found at www.paulliorio.blogspot.com).<br /><br /><br /><br />I sometimes wonder: if Jayson Blair hadn't been caught,<br /><br />and he almost wasn't, he would've surely been promoted<br /><br />up the ranks, with all flanks protected by management,<br /><br />so that any whistle-blower who tried to complain about him<br /><br />would be drummed out of the business, ridiculed and made to<br /><br />look dishonest -- and you know that's true. And you have<br /><br />to wonder how many Blairs-that-haven't-been-caught are<br /><br />working in upper management at lesser newspapers than<br /><br />the Times. At some companies it might be an epidemic.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for March 4, 2008<br /><br /><br />-- So who's going to win in Ohio and Texas tonight?<br /><br />Hard to predict. The best comment came from<br /><br />Obama: "Remember New Hampshire."<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Everyone's talking about Hillary's cameo on<br /><br />SNL but the funniest stuff came later in the program<br /><br />when the always-inspired Kristen Wiig played Peter<br /><br />Pan -- truly hilarious.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Regarding my column of February 22 (below): someone<br /><br />is curious about whether I went far into Bulgaria<br /><br />during my '76 trip. I did. I traveled alone by<br /><br />local train across the entire length of Bulgaria -- and<br /><br />then back again! -- snapping pictures and taking notes<br /><br />all the way. My account of it can be read at<br /><br />www.paulliorio.blogspot.com.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Also, an old friend wanted to know if I've ever<br /><br /><em>co-written </em>a song. My response: I've written<br /><br />countless songs over the decades but I have never<br /><br /><em>co-written</em> a song with anyone. By the way,<br /><br />MP3 versions of 60 of my songs are posted at<br /><br />www.vibecat.com/pauliorio, and anyone with an Internet<br /><br />connection can listen for free. And, yes, every note and<br /><br />every line of all 60 songs were written solely by me<br /><br />(only exception is "Waterboardin' USA," which is based<br /><br />on a Beach Boys tune).<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Also, I hope my "Holy Country Song" isn't<br /><br />misunderstood -- I actually enjoy some gospel music<br /><br />and think the folks at the CMAs have honored some<br /><br />of the greatest recording artists ever. My song<br /><br />is meant to be irreverent satire, and should be<br /><br />heard in that spirit.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />EXTRA! for February 29, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Regarding Hillary's ad about answering the phone at 3am:<br /><br /><br />At three in the morning, in the White House, I want<br /><br />a president who's in the process of getting a good<br /><br />night's sleep, so that he or she is fully ready<br /><br />for whatever events erupt when he or she is awake.<br /><br />We're not electing a receptionist who's responsible<br /><br />for fielding and filtering every call that<br /><br />comes through the switchboard -- the president<br /><br />hires smart and capable people to do that and to<br /><br />handle emergencies that might crop up in the<br /><br />overnight hours. Her ad presents a somewhat<br /><br />disturbing vision of a Hillary presidency, in<br /><br />which she pulls all-nighters by the phone, popping<br /><br />speed, drinking Yuban and waiting anxiously for that<br /><br />hypothetical world leader to call.<br /><br /><br /><br />And by the way, if you're awake at 3am, then you're<br /><br />almost certainly asleep -- or awfully wired and<br /><br />tired -- at 3pm, which may not be the way you want to<br /><br />arrange your day as president or as candidate.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />P.S. -- With the selection of Matt Gonzalez as his<br /><br />running-mate, Ralph Nader has now exponentially<br /><br />increased his chances of winning most voters in<br /><br />some parts of Haight Street.<br /><br />____________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 26, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Regarding the photo of Obama in Kenya: frankly, he<br /><br />looks a bit like Chef Boyaredee, doesn't he?<br /><br /><br /><br />Look, I took off my shoes when I visited the<br /><br />Haghia Sofia, and that doesn't make me a Sunni.<br /><br /><br /><br />There's always an element of when-in-Rome in<br /><br />both state and personals visits abroad (didn't<br /><br />I see footage of Bush in a dashiki during an<br /><br />African visit?).<br /><br /><br /><br />That said, Hillary is inadvertently doing Obama<br /><br />a bit of a favor, giving him a taste of the<br /><br />nasty ads he'll be facing from the Republican<br /><br />machine come October.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />EXTRA! for February 25, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />I really have nothing much to say about the Oscars<br /><br /><br />this year. I mean, I really admire Paul Thomas Anderson<br /><br />and Daniel Day Lewis and "There Will Be Blood"<br /><br />and the Coen Bros. -- and Cate Blanchett is exactly<br /><br />as awesome as any woman can ever get, Hilary Swank<br /><br />looks fabulous, and it's always great to see<br /><br />Harrison Ford and George Clooney. But for the<br /><br />most part it was snoozeville. I was even wondering<br /><br />whether the writers' strike was still on when I saw the<br /><br />Rogen/Hill bit, easily the most embarrassing and unfunny<br /><br />comic segment in recent Oscar history.<br /><br /><br /><br />And the overnight ratings have just come in, folks. The<br /><br />80th Academy Awards telecast is now officially the<br /><br />lowest-rated Oscar ceremony ever -- and they worked<br /><br />overtime to earn that distinction, I can assure you.<br /><br /><br /><br />Next year, here's an idea: bring back Steve Martin. Or<br /><br />bring back David Letterman. I know his first try<br /><br />didn't exactly light up the airwaves,<br /><br />but Letterman is starting to look better and better<br /><br />now that we've seen host after host fail.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />___________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 25, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Regarding Ralph Nader, let me say this:<br /><br />A man who stands atop a mountain at noon<br /><br />stands in sunlight; the same man who stands<br /><br />atop that same mountain at midnight stands<br /><br />in darkness. He who refuses to change changes<br /><br />anyway, because the world changes around him. In<br /><br />his youth, Nader was progressive; in his old age,<br /><br />refusing to shift with the times, Nader is an utter<br /><br />reactionary, one of the world's truly despicable<br /><br />fascist-sympathizers.<br /><br /><br /><br />As Bob Dylan wrote: "Your old road is rapidly agin'/<br /><br />Please get out of the new one if you can't lend a hand/<br /><br />For the times they are a changing."<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />I'm flattered and gratified and a bit surprised that<br /><br />my extremely irreverent cartoon series -- "Bin Laden,<br /><br />the Jihadist Pooch" -- is being circulated on the web<br /><br />as much as it is. I wrote, drew and posted the series<br /><br />independently last October, not expecting it to<br /><br />go very viral, but now I'm seeing it show up in lots<br /><br />of places online.<br /><br /><br /><br />And let me say if bin Laden or his people are<br /><br />in any way offended by my series then I<br /><br />just want to say that I sincerely and deeply<br /><br />hope that you are offended on a fundamental level.<br /><br /><br /><br />The series, "Bin Laden, the Jihadist Pooch,"<br /><br />can be viewed at:<br /><br />http://cartoonsbyiorio.blogspot.com.<br /><br /><br />Enjoy!<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />___________________________<br /><br /><br /><strong>-- the daily digression column celebrates its first anniversary today. it made its debut on february 24, 2007. thanks to all those who have linked it to their sites, quoted it or written with comments. a second year of digressions begins today! ---</strong><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 24, 2008<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://home.cfl.rr.com/csduffey/Rennlist/mom_corvair.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://home.cfl.rr.com/csduffey/Rennlist/mom_corvair.jpg" /></a><em>Ralph Nader in drag atop his beloved Corvair in the 1960s (or so say the people at Nader's nursing home). </em><br /><br /><br />It was a bit heartwarming to see Tim Russert<br /><br />raid the nursing home to give some airtime to an<br /><br />apparent Alzheimer's patient, though it was obvious<br /><br />the guy's cognitive functions were clearly<br /><br />compromised, so it was sort of exploitative to<br /><br />see such a mentally disabled guy on "Meet the Press"<br /><br />(he said his name was Ralph Nader and apparently<br /><br />couldn't tell the difference between Barack Obama<br /><br />and George W. Bush, when shown photos of the two).<br /><br /><br /><br />People at the nursing home, though not reliable,<br /><br />tell me he was once an automobile exec, responsible<br /><br />for the Corvair or something, and also that Russert<br /><br />took the time to pick up another resident of the<br /><br />home, Doris Goodwin, in a package deal for his<br /><br />show; she provided the much-needed Theodore Roosevelt<br /><br />angle on the '08 election, an insight now spreading<br /><br />like wildfire on the blogs and among cutting edge<br /><br />academic thinkers.<br /><br /><br /><br />I mean, hey, Russert coulda put some innovative<br /><br />theorist or a brilliant Stanford prof or even<br /><br />me on his show to talk about the '08 election,<br /><br />and he would've been better off. (My qualifications<br /><br />are at www.paulliorio.blogspot.com. But I guess I<br /><br />don't have the requisite experience as a<br /><br />plagiarist, so that would disqualify me.)<br /><br /><br /><br />After seeing Nader, I must admit I started to see the<br /><br />Corvair in a new light. Looking at it from just the<br /><br />aesthetic angle, and putting aside its considerable safety<br /><br />flaws, I can now see its design as evocative of an entire<br /><br />era of suburban pop culture in America -- it almost<br /><br />qualifies as pop art, like a can of Tab. So in celebration<br /><br />of the Corvair, I've posted a picture of Nader with his<br /><br />classic vehicle (above).<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>Is Black the New Catholic? </strong><br /><br /><br /><br />Truth be told, some Dems aren't backing Barack because<br /><br />they think most of America is still a bit too racist to<br /><br />elect a black president.<br /><br /><br /><br />But think of it this way: if the GOP ticket was<br /><br />Condi Rice/Alan Keyes and the Dem ticket was<br /><br />John Edwards/Bill Richardson, Republicans in red<br /><br />states would vote in droves against the white<br /><br />ticket and for the African-American one. Which proves<br /><br />there is no inherent aversion to electing a black<br /><br />president among even conservative voters, if they<br /><br />feel that candidate can best represent their interests.<br /><br /><br /><br />When thinking of bigotry in the U.S., think of the<br /><br />white racist in a red state who gets himself into<br /><br />legal trouble and decides to hire an ace black attorney<br /><br />because he knows he's one of best in the biz. That<br /><br />white guy still has an underlying bigotry toward<br /><br />blacks, but he hires the African-American because<br /><br />he knows his interests will best be served by him.<br /><br /><br /><br />Likewise, if a white bigot in Utah has to have delicate<br /><br />heart surgery and must choose between a black<br /><br />surgeon whose medical judgment has been proved<br /><br />correct time and again and a veteran white surgeon<br /><br />who has had several malpractice suits filed against<br /><br />him, who do you think the racist would choose?<br /><br /><br /><br />That sort of dynamic may come into play in November,<br /><br />if Obama is the nominee. Swing rednecks in purple<br /><br />states might think this way: "I don't like black people<br /><br />very much, but this Obama guy is smart and has<br /><br />good judgment and will do my bidding most effectively,<br /><br />so I'm voting for him."<br /><br /><br /><br />Could it be that Obama is more like JFK than we imagined?<br /><br />Could it be that...black is the new Catholic?<br /><br /><br /><br />Some months ago, which is to say centuries ago in political<br /><br />years, there was misplaced concern that Mitt Romney's<br /><br />Mormonism was like JFK's Catholicism -- a point of<br /><br />prejudice that voters might not be able to overcome.<br /><br />But voters ended up dismissing Romney for reasons<br /><br />unrelated to his religious beliefs.<br /><br /><br /><br />Turns out Mormonism wasn't the new Catholicism;<br /><br />prejudice against African-Americans is apparently what<br /><br />still needs to be overcome in '08 and what might<br /><br />keep Obama from having his mail re-directed to<br /><br />1600 Pennsylvania Avenue next year.<br /><br /><br /><br />But that prejudice seems to be fading fast as voters<br /><br />realize that...this guy makes sense. And just as the<br /><br />redneck in Selma will hire a brilliant black attorney<br /><br />to get him out of a legal jam, so some borderline racist<br /><br />voters might hire Barack to carry out their agenda,<br /><br />because they know he's more effective than his rivals.<br /><br /><br /><br />As I've written before, the black/white division in<br /><br />this country is getting to be quaint, an almost old<br /><br />fashioned way of viewing American ethnic diversity.<br /><br />Out here, in the San Francisco Bay Area, and along<br /><br />much of the Pacific rim, the primary ethnic division<br /><br />is between Asians and non-Asians, not between blacks<br /><br />and whites. And as the population of other parts of<br /><br />the country diversifies, the "black" classification<br /><br />becomes increasingly meaningless and insignificant.<br /><br />(I mean, does a dark-skinned Jamaican qualify as black?<br /><br />How about someone of Jamaican-British ancestry who<br /><br />has lighter skin than an Italian Calabrian? Ethnic<br /><br />distinctions become increasingly irrelevant as more<br /><br />diverse ingredients are added to the melting pot.)<br /><br /><br /><br />More than race, age may be the driving factor in<br /><br />the '08 campaign. It's probably less significant that<br /><br />Barack is black than that he is the first post-baby<br /><br />boomer, post-rock 'n' roll era candidate.<br /><br /><br /><br />Over the decades, we've had our earful of boomer<br /><br />candidates like Bill Clinton, who liked to don shades<br /><br />and play bluesy sax like a jazzbo wannabe of the Beat era.<br /><br />And we've seen amiable pols like Mike Huckabee, who have<br /><br />a rock 'n' roll sorta cadence to their speechifying ways<br /><br />on the road.<br /><br /><br /><br />But Barack is the very first serious presidential<br /><br />candidate who speaks with a hint of the cadence and<br /><br />the rhythm of the hip hop generation. And I don't mean<br /><br />hip hop in terms of race, I mean hip hop in terms of age<br /><br />group, hip hop in terms of a rhythm and tone of talking<br /><br />that almost qualifies as a separate pop culture dialect<br /><br />from the rock 'n' roll dialect.<br /><br /><br /><br />Obama's general flow of oratory is clearly influenced<br /><br />by a post-rock era of expression, and that's probably<br /><br />part of the reason why young people are responding to<br /><br />the undertone and undertow of his message.<br /><br /><br /><br />"Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what<br /><br />you can do for your country" was like a succinct and pithy<br /><br />pop song of its era.<br /><br /><br /><br />But listen to the expansive rolling flow of the post-rock<br /><br />generation(from an Obama speech of 1/26/08): "And as we<br /><br />take this journey across the country we love with the message<br /><br />we've carried from the plains of Iowa to the hills of New<br /><br />Hampshire, from the Nevada desert to the South Carolina coast,<br /><br />we have the same message we had when we were up and when we<br /><br />were down: that out of many, we are one..."<br /><br /><br /><br />The generational divide will be even more vivid if it's<br /><br />Obama versus John McCain, who is not only pre-Run DMC<br /><br />but pre-Beatles in general sensibility.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 22, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>The Birth of a Nation</strong><br /><br /><br />Back when it was communist and run by Tito, and<br /><br />when I was a teenager, I traveled alone by local train<br /><br />through Serbia and the rest of the Balkans, the area<br /><br />that's now in turmoil because of Kosovo's secession.<br /><br />Hard to believe today that all those diverse countries<br /><br />in that region I traveled through -- Serbia, Bosnia,<br /><br />Croatia, Slovenia, Kosovo, etc. -- were once part<br /><br />of a single unified nation called Yugoslavia.<br /><br /><br /><br />That said, Kosovo's independence is a very welcome<br /><br />development, and Russia and China should get on board<br /><br />and recognize its sovereignty.<br /><br /><br /><br />Sovereignty is the only effective protection the<br /><br />Kosovars have against the historically hostile Serbs<br /><br />that surround them. Have Russia and China forgotten that<br /><br />the entire Kosovar Albanian population was on its way<br /><br />to being mass murdered by the Serbs in the late<br /><br />1990s -- before the U.S. got involved and put an<br /><br />end to the genocide (euphemistically called<br /><br />"ethnic cleansing")?<br /><br /><br /><br />I mean, Kosovo is not a heavily populated area,<br /><br />by any means (the entire population of the country<br /><br />has around 2 million people, which is roughly the<br /><br />size of Houston, Texas; Pristina, the only "big<br /><br />city" in that area, has around half the population<br /><br />of Oakland, Calif.). So the fact that the Serbs<br /><br />killed at least 6,000 Kosovars in 1999 alone is<br /><br />significant -- and that's a low ball estimate,<br /><br />because the military folks in Belgrade burned a lot<br /><br />of bodies to cover up their atrocities. Not only<br /><br />that, but almost everyone in Kosovo (90%, for<br /><br />crissakes!) was run out of his or her home in '99<br /><br />(remember the endless stream of Kosovar Albanians<br /><br />making that long march to safety to Albania?).<br /><br />Meanwhile, the sadistic Serbian government at<br /><br />the time actually used mass rape as a military<br /><br />weapon in towns like Pec and Djakoivica.<br /><br /><br /><br />What more proof does Vladimir Putin require to<br /><br />see that Kosovo needs the protection of sovereignty?<br /><br />Or does he not see the reality because of an overriding<br /><br />preoccupation with the loss of the Soviet empire?<br /><br /><br /><br />Remember, less than two decades ago, Russia was<br /><br />the seat of the vast Soviet Union, which included 15<br /><br />republics (16, if you count Bulgaria), numerous European<br /><br />satellites and various allies elsewhere. Today, the empire<br /><br />is in fragments, and even the fragments of the fragments<br /><br />have fragmented.<br /><br /><br /><br />To be sure, Yugoslavia was never formally an Iron<br /><br />Curtain country. While nominally allied with the Soviets,<br /><br />Tito always maintained some independence from the<br /><br />Kremlin. But it was still, essentially, part of the<br /><br />Eastern Bloc, which is why it now must be a bitter reality<br /><br />for Putin to see Yugoslavia splinter into not two or three<br /><br />pieces but into six independent nations -- and, as of<br /><br />this week, seven!<br /><br /><br /><br />Loss of empire is a tough reality for any country. And<br /><br />Putin is merely reflecting his constituents's passionate<br /><br />desire to be strong again, on par with the U.S. again,<br /><br />a playa again, feared by enemies again.<br /><br /><br /><br />For four years, I lived in a heavily Russian/Ukrainian<br /><br />neighborhood in Los Angeles, so I was constantly in contact,<br /><br />on a daily basis, with Russian immigrants. And almost every<br /><br />time I talked with them about their homeland, they said<br /><br />the same thing (to a person): they wanted Russia to be<br /><br />strong again, like it was during the Soviet era.<br /><br />And one really nice guy -- his name was Vladimir,<br /><br />and he used to let me use his fax machine -- would always<br /><br />smile and flex his biceps like Popeye when he said he<br /><br />wanted his country to be powerful again.<br /><br /><br /><br />And I can imagine that if that's how they feel<br /><br />in east West Hollywood, they must surely feel that<br /><br />way in Russia itself (coverage of Kosovo's secession<br /><br />on the Russia Today (RT) news service shows that).<br /><br /><br /><br />As I mentioned, I traveled deep into south Serbia<br /><br />in '76, an area very few tourists ever see, and went<br /><br />just east of Kosovo before crossing into the most<br /><br />Iron Curtainish of all Iron Curtain countries, Bulgaria.<br /><br /><br /><br />And what I remember (besides the spectacular Balkan<br /><br />Mountains scenery, among other things) is that it seemed<br /><br />to get poorer and more rural the farther south I went.<br /><br />The area between Kosovo and Bulgaria was, frankly,<br /><br />downright depressing, full of "empty roads, solemn faces,<br /><br />dreary checkpoints," as I wrote in my journal at the time.<br /><br /><br /><br />Today it's still one of the poorest regions in Europe<br /><br />(even though the Kosovar Albanians are better off than<br /><br />the Albanian Albanians, which isn't saying much, given<br /><br />the enduring paranoid legacy of Hoxha). Common<br /><br />sense says Kosovo and Serbia both have better chances<br /><br />of improving their lots as separate entities. And<br /><br />let's face it, the Serb's fixation on Pristina as<br /><br />their national birthplace has to be a secondary<br /><br />consideration, given the murderous practical<br /><br />realities of the past decade.<br /><br /><br /><br />By the way, yesterday's rioting in Belgrade was carried<br /><br />out by a suspiciously small number of people (or at least<br /><br />the burning of the embassy was); it didn't<br /><br />look much like a real riot or a populist uprising where<br /><br />the streets are overflowing with people who are overflowing<br /><br />with passion. There doesn't seem to be evidence of a<br /><br />extraordinary popular groundswell in Serbia against Kosovo's<br /><br />secession, so I bet the new nation stands.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 21, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>The John 'n' Vicki Scandal</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/ap_john_mccain_070425_ms.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/ap_john_mccain_070425_ms.jpg" /></a><em>The Man Who Missed the 1960s: did he discover free love only decades later? </em><br /><br /><br />I've done enough journalism to know that when a story<br /><br />like the one about John McCain in today's New York Times<br /><br />appears, there is almost certainly a vast amount of<br /><br />reportage that the paper is withholding.<br /><br /><br /><br />In other words, The Times probably knows that McCain and<br /><br />Vicki Iseman had had a sexual affair, but the paper isn't<br /><br />reporting it because some editors at the Times don't feel<br /><br />they've nailed it. I mean, I have no inside info about<br /><br />this particular story, but I do know, from having written<br /><br />and reported for almost all the major newspapers in the<br /><br />U.S. on a variety of subjects, that that's usually the<br /><br />pattern, that only a small percentage of what you know<br /><br />to be true actually sees publication, particularly in a<br /><br />story that's as potentially explosive as this one.<br /><br /><br /><br />Look at the reporting about Mark Foley's serial flirtations<br /><br />with underage pages. In that case, papers like the<br /><br />St. Petersburg (Fl) Times had solid knowledge of Foley's<br /><br />indiscretions but didn't go to press with it, probably partly<br /><br />because of pressure from the Foley camp. (And the Larry Craig<br /><br />incident wasn't reported until months after his arrest.)<br /><br /><br /><br />Thankfully, the New York Times bowed to no such pressure<br /><br />in this case, despite the fact that McCain himself made a<br /><br />personal phone call to Bill Keller, who runs the Times.<br /><br /><br /><br />No, my intuition tells me the Times is being very<br /><br />restrained in its reporting and that there's a lot more<br /><br />to this than has already been made public. Kudos<br /><br />to Rutenberg/Thompson/Kirkpatrick/Labaton -- and Keller --<br /><br />for running the story.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><a href="http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/3077520.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF193B3EA2C03450C94867BD1FBDF0F8625395A5397277B4DC33E"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/3077520.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF193B3EA2C03450C94867BD1FBDF0F8625395A5397277B4DC33E" /></a><br /><em>The Iseman Trophy? (Doesn't she look like the sort of woman who would be Vladimir Putin's "special personal assistant"? Or NASA's first female moonwalker?)</em><br /><br /><br />P.S. -- Now that he's in the national spotlight, McCain<br /><br />is starting to show signs of a Nixonish furtiveness, if not<br /><br />paranoia. Notice how he criticized Barack Obama for<br /><br />saying that Obama would bomb Pakistan to kill bin Laden<br /><br />whether the Pakistani government gave its consent or<br /><br />not. McCain retorted that a world leader shouldn't<br /><br />telegraph such intentions.<br /><br /><br /><br />McCain is wrong. Sometimes you should telegraph your<br /><br />intentions and sometimes you shouldn't. For example,<br /><br />if we knew that bin Laden was in Karachi right now,<br /><br />we would, of course, not signal to anyone that<br /><br />we were about to attack his hide-out, lest we run<br /><br />the risk of alerting bin Laden, who would then try<br /><br />to escape.<br /><br /><br /><br />But in speaking generally about whether we would<br /><br />attack inside Pakistan if bin Laden were there, it<br /><br />is important that we let the Pakistanis know<br /><br />that our standing policy is that we're going to<br /><br />take out Osama where ever we find him, without<br /><br />asking any government's permission.<br /><br /><br /><br />Telegraphing that intention in advance is strategically<br /><br />important, because you don't want to run the risk of<br /><br />surprising your allies in Pakistan with a bombing raid.<br /><br />Telling them of your standing policy prepares them,<br /><br />psychologically and otherwise, for the moment<br /><br />when we do strike. (There are also examples where<br /><br />signaling your intentions can serve as a deterrent<br /><br />to bad actors. Remember the wisdom in the famous<br /><br />lines in the Kubrick picture "Dr. Strangelove":<br /><br />"Deterrence is the art of producing in the mind of<br /><br />the enemy the fear to attack" -- and "the whole point<br /><br />of the Doomsday Machine is lost if you keep it a secret!<br /><br />Why didn't you tell the world?!")<br /><br /><br /><br />Psychologically, it appears as if McCain has<br /><br />the mindset of a leader with a predilection<br /><br />for secret foreign policy ventures. What<br /><br />such leaders don't understand is that they're<br /><br />conducting foreign policy at the behest of<br /><br />the public, which has every right to know,<br /><br />by and large, what's being done in its<br /><br />name.<br /><br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 15, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Don't act shocked. Don't act like it was an<br /><br />isolated incident. Every four or<br /><br />five months, there's a brand new massacre at some<br /><br />school or at some mall, and every time it happens,<br /><br />there is collective amnesia throughout the land.<br /><br /><br /><br />Suddenly, conveniently, we forget all all about<br /><br />the previous massacre that happened a mere few months<br /><br />earlier, that one that happened at the mall in Colorado,<br /><br />remember, the one in which the guy brought a bazooka into<br /><br />a china shop and killed 87 people or something. Remember?<br /><br />And remember the one before that, the one in Omaha, the<br /><br />one where some guy in a trench coat opened fire during home<br /><br />economics class? Or was that the one at the taco stand?<br /><br />They all seem to blend together, like blood into blood.<br /><br /><br /><br />Almost nobody in the media mentions the previous massacres<br /><br />that happened two and five months ago when they mention<br /><br />the current one. Could somebody tell me why that<br /><br />is? Is it amnesia? Stupidity? Lack of journalistic<br /><br />training? Pressure from the NRA? All four probably.<br /><br /><br /><br />To show you how strikingly similar these shootings<br /><br />have become, here's my Daily Digression column from<br /><br />April 18, 2007 (after the Virginia Tech shooting):<br /><br /><br /><br />Every few years we go through the same pattern in the<br /><br />U.S.: there is an awful mass murder, everyone agrees the<br /><br />massacre could've been avoided if there had been tougher gun laws,<br /><br />and then we hit the snooze alarm. Several years later, there<br /><br />is yet another unspeakable shooting, everyone agrees there should<br /><br />be stricter gun control, and then we hit the snooze alarm again.<br /><br /><br /><br />This time, following the tragic killings at Virginia<br /><br />Tech, we will no doubt hit the snooze alarm once again.<br /><br />Oh, there will inevitably be Senate hearings and high-minded<br /><br />editorials in major papers, but that will all come to naught.<br /><br />Because the gun lobby and the NRA are simply too influential.<br /><br /><br /><br />Again, we will pursue all the wrong avenues. We will<br /><br />focus on campus lockdown procedures when we should be focusing on<br /><br />gun control. We will focus on monitoring creative writing<br /><br />classes when we should be focusing on gun control.<br /><br /><br />-------<br /><br /><strong>And here's my Daily Digression from December 10, 2007 (after<br /><br />the Omaha shooting):</strong><br /><br /><br />Yet Another Tragedy Caused By Gun Permissiveness<br /><br />Almost no news organization is reporting the Colorado<br /><br />shootings this way: "In the wake of the Omaha<br /><br />shootings...."<br /><br /><br /><br />Yet every news organizaton should be mentioning Omaha<br /><br />in its stories about Colorado. Context is Journalism 101.<br /><br />But lots of tv news correspondents are saying, "Omaha?<br /><br />What's Omaha? Ohhh that!! That was soooo 72 hours ago!"<br /><br /><br /><br />So let's see: Omaha has been completely wiped from memory<br /><br />now that there's this new shooting spree in Colorado.<br /><br />And lemme guess the reason why certain tv newsers aren't<br /><br />mentioning Omaha in stories about Colorado; they're<br /><br />probably saying something like, "The shooter in the last<br /><br />one used an AK-47 and the shooter this time used an AK-46,<br /><br />which, of course, is a vast difference."<br /><br /><br /><br />They fail to see that the common denominator is bullets.<br /><br />Both shooters used bullets. If they hadn't, nobody'd be<br /><br />dead today.<br /><br /><br /><br />Now let's take a look at the real reason Omaha isn't<br /><br />being brought up in stories about Colorado: it's<br /><br />called the NRA. The NRA is so well-organized, so<br /><br />lawyered up, with so many true believers who know<br /><br />how to threaten you without threatening you, that<br /><br />some news orgs take the path of least resistance<br /><br />and leave out references to Omaha in stories about<br /><br />Colorado, just as they left out references to Virginia Tech<br /><br />in stories about Omaha, just as they'll leave out references<br /><br />to Colorado in stories about the next shooting (and, by the way,<br /><br />just as they left out references to Tawana Brawley in stories<br /><br />about Crystal Mangum).<br /><br /><br /><br />At some news organizations, they report the truth without fear<br /><br />or favor -- unless the truth is too unpopular.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><strong>And here's my Daily Digression from December 7, 2007:</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />Oooops! I forgot! Gays, guns and god are forbidden<br /><br />topics during a presidential election year, which is<br /><br />why you're hearing absolutely n-o-t-h-i-n-g about gun<br /><br />control in the wake of the Omaha slayings.<br /><br /><br /><br />So I now have a new personal policy. From here in, I'll<br /><br />not extend sympathies to victims of gun violence who<br /><br />weren't in favor of stricter gun regulations before being<br /><br />shot. Because everybody, by now, can see plainly and in full<br /><br />light that gun permissiveness is precisely the cause of all<br /><br />these mass killings.<br /><br /><br /><br />After every one of these slaughters, gun fanatics always<br /><br />say the same thing, and that is: "If a nearby bystander<br /><br />had been armed, the gunman could have been taken out."<br /><br /><br /><br />OK, fine. let's put that theory to the test. Name one<br /><br />major mass shooting incident -- Columbine, Virginia<br /><br />Tech, etc. -- where an armed bystander (not a cop or<br /><br />guard) saved the day by shooting the gunman. Name one.<br /><br /><br /><br />The reason you can't name one is because there isn't<br /><br />one, and the reason there isn't one is because in a<br /><br />random shooting 1) victims are taken by surprise,<br /><br />and 2) it's all over within minutes, before anyone<br /><br />else can lock and load, and 3) the gunman typically<br /><br />ends the rampage by killing himself.<br /><br /><br /><br />Even in robberies that unfold over a longer period of<br /><br />time, there is still massive and unpredictable risk<br /><br />when an armed bystander intervenes (it often ends up<br /><br />more like the robbery sequence (in the pastry shop)<br /><br />in the movie "Boogie Nights" than like a Charles<br /><br />Bronson flick).<br /><br />----<br /><br /><br />Only thing I have to add is that the "Today" show is<br /><br />my favorite morning program, but the people on that<br /><br />show are profoundly stupid when reporting about gun massacres.<br /><br />Don't be so disingenuous as to ask "Why" on a segment<br /><br />about the Illinois shooting that doesn't even<br /><br />mention gun control issues. Don't think we can't<br /><br />read that. In reality, you're afraid of the NRA;<br /><br />but your phony public explanation is that you're<br /><br />trying to be fair to the NRA. (And by the way, what the<br /><br />fuck are you doing giving podium to a liar like<br /><br />Al Sharpton on Today? You know for a fact<br /><br />he's an extravagant liar yet you still give him<br /><br />airtime. What's the matter? Doris Goodwin wasn't<br /><br />available?)<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, "why" is not the salient question<br /><br />in this case. "Why" is a notably dim question<br /><br />in this case because everybody already knows "why."<br /><br />Why it happened is because a mentally ill person<br /><br />had easy access to guns. That's why. The important<br /><br />question is "how," as in: "how are we going to<br /><br />prevent the next one?"<br /><br /><br /><br />And now there's almost a let's-throw-good-money-after-bad<br /><br />syndrome at certain news organizations; they're<br /><br />not mentioning the preceding massacres because they<br /><br />haven't mentioned them for months, so they justify<br /><br />their bad judgment by continuing to exercise their<br /><br />bad judgment.<br /><br /><br /><br />At least we can applaud Congress; they're busy<br /><br />making sure that future gunmen don't inject steroids.<br /><br /><br /><br />My condolences to all the victims of the Illinois<br /><br />shooting who supported stricter gun control before<br /><br />this latest massacre.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 14, 2008<br /><br /><br />To celebrate Valentine's Day, I've posted a new MP3<br /><br />of one of my songs, "I'll Love You Forever (But Not<br /><br />in This Weather)," which people seem to be enjoying.<br /><br /><br /><br />Just go to vibecat.com/pauliorio and click on the name<br /><br />of the song! (No downloads, no passwords, no payment.)<br /><br /><br /><br />Some backstory on the song: I wrote it in Berkeley in<br /><br />2003. In 2004, I self-produced a cassette tape version<br /><br />of it. In 2005, a friend I hadn't seen in decades heard<br /><br />that song (and others I'd written) and funded/produced a<br /><br />CD version of the song.<br /><br /><br /><br />Unfortunately, I've never been satisfied with the production<br /><br />quality of either edition, so yesterday I self-produced a<br /><br />new version of "I'll Love You Forever (But Not in This<br /><br />Weather)," which I think captures the song best.<br /><br /><br /><br />The song was sort of inspired by Dean Friedman's "Ariel,"<br /><br />The Small Faces's "Lazy Sunday Afternoon" and The Kinks's<br /><br />"Apeman."<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, as I said, people seem to enjoy it, so give it<br /><br />a listen! (And happy Valentine's Day to -- I think<br /><br />she knows who she is.)<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />P.S. -- Lyrics at www.pauliorio.blogspot.com.<br /><br /><br />________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 13, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />Can somebody please explain why the hell Congress is<br /><br />currently having hearings on steroids use by<br /><br />sports entertainers rather than working feverishly<br /><br />to provide universal health care for all Americans?<br /><br /><br /><br />Oh, and also, isn't it a scandal that our current<br /><br />governmment hasn't found Osama bin Laden after<br /><br />six and a half years of searching? Uh, maybe that's<br /><br />worth a Congressional hearing, dontcha think?<br /><br /><br /><br />But no: instead Congress is spending valuable<br /><br />time and money documenting who injected various<br /><br />sports entertainers in the ass with drugs<br /><br />that helped them do their jobs better.<br /><br /><br /><br />You guys on the Hill have your priorities<br /><br />right this morning (I said ironically).<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />___________________________<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 12, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />I've seen all sorts of Berkeley<br /><br />protests and demonstrations in my day, but the<br /><br />ongoing scene outside the Berkeley city council<br /><br />building, which I photographed a couple hours<br /><br />ago, has got to rank among the most eccentric of<br /><br />'em all. At this hour, members of the U.S. Marines,<br /><br />and their advocates, are squaring off against anti-war<br /><br />protesters, as scores of police in riot gear<br /><br />stand by to keep the peace.<br /><br /><br /><br />The confrontation is the result of a recent<br /><br />Berkeley city council letter that stated that<br /><br />the Marines and their recruitment office<br /><br />were unwelcome and unwanted within city<br /><br />limits -- a letter that the USMC and its<br /><br />allies vigorously objected to. Tonight<br /><br />the city council is expected to formally<br /><br />retreat on its condemnation of the Marines, much<br /><br />to the chagrin of some anti-warriors.<br /><br /><br /><br />Here's how things looked during the 6pm hour:<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5oJ3Cy3dWSTpnOaB40Vep-LiY1CPh-7Avc3O620hfhXZI9zAyIb7tgfqpS_GntyILLmAmx_wuQTYH4laeJF5uF0mvpBWXr4sZ9d0ZRFR-wRfyDO12SC08cPMnQEvj2f-QBVamRphV4og/s1600-h/scanberkflags.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5166311666702680418" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh5oJ3Cy3dWSTpnOaB40Vep-LiY1CPh-7Avc3O620hfhXZI9zAyIb7tgfqpS_GntyILLmAmx_wuQTYH4laeJF5uF0mvpBWXr4sZ9d0ZRFR-wRfyDO12SC08cPMnQEvj2f-QBVamRphV4og/s400/scanberkflags.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Supporters of the Marines are waving a vast number of flags.</em><br /><br />---<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQUq54NU8A6n7naGPF6254dm8rr1gJ53OOqzxhyphenhyphenDcmRs7b1PsZiPeEEDas5Ar63DzeqkYPjRc2hcqrjmKzU_ChnLE9sDh0137N5fiNbDsQ5Nh2YeoKdVRmVNtAHR48ZEF4oj5qNsevfyM/s1600-h/scanberkantibush.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5166317108426244466" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQUq54NU8A6n7naGPF6254dm8rr1gJ53OOqzxhyphenhyphenDcmRs7b1PsZiPeEEDas5Ar63DzeqkYPjRc2hcqrjmKzU_ChnLE9sDh0137N5fiNbDsQ5Nh2YeoKdVRmVNtAHR48ZEF4oj5qNsevfyM/s400/scanberkantibush.jpg" /></a><br /><em>the anti-war crowd was kept at a distance from the Marine supporters</em><br /><br />---<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrQeLIC98upvCUmvxOC7-1L-BaO7lBFdTtRvkKq1Kh4-frid1Ls6xUcBeZgYkybKKffwBqhBIHrihuroPSSzjzEbZkLvWetRhJAKeRm6rpo8kFsWZLytg1If3o1rk6K6WGvZOlBgzjjoY/s1600-h/scanberkbanjo.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5166324418460582274" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrQeLIC98upvCUmvxOC7-1L-BaO7lBFdTtRvkKq1Kh4-frid1Ls6xUcBeZgYkybKKffwBqhBIHrihuroPSSzjzEbZkLvWetRhJAKeRm6rpo8kFsWZLytg1If3o1rk6K6WGvZOlBgzjjoY/s400/scanberkbanjo.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Marines, cops and even a counter-cultural banjo player mill in the protest area.</em><br /><br />----<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSpTEtoQVXbTfic2Way3JP-CE8vmX1TGhj9ARYmRr9D6K6SMS3HikSR2RX3AbJEH3j1yiQMwCRZ0uVaxhteFi2qyYSjNPebdq22H67aHL_lVkIH8r3wmO_0kPk2Dz1rdWxu-06HWaZyRU/s1600-h/scanberkcopinriot.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5166329224528986514" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSpTEtoQVXbTfic2Way3JP-CE8vmX1TGhj9ARYmRr9D6K6SMS3HikSR2RX3AbJEH3j1yiQMwCRZ0uVaxhteFi2qyYSjNPebdq22H67aHL_lVkIH8r3wmO_0kPk2Dz1rdWxu-06HWaZyRU/s400/scanberkcopinriot.jpg" /></a><br /><em>police were in riot gear, just in case</em><br /><br />-----<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXi8k6cOrvL7-QONfqDzxIKLrqh98piiH0RHc8j7VIEwRXp1_y7bHuxvMWA8QLsb0MQOYe_ebifXT6GwanfMYw2ehBPEEh6wajBIskp2s8limeO3gOBABAOkuGzGIcz_TpKtibReZAYEM/s1600-h/scanberkcantafford.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5166331037005185442" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXi8k6cOrvL7-QONfqDzxIKLrqh98piiH0RHc8j7VIEwRXp1_y7bHuxvMWA8QLsb0MQOYe_ebifXT6GwanfMYw2ehBPEEh6wajBIskp2s8limeO3gOBABAOkuGzGIcz_TpKtibReZAYEM/s400/scanberkcantafford.jpg" /></a><br /><em>If the photo developing machine hadn't chopped off the top of this pic, you'd see that some demonstrators had some wit -- like this guy with a sign reading, "I Can't Afford an Actual Sign."</em><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 10, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>Remembering Roy Scheider</strong><br /><a href="http://www.sharkisstillworking.com/images/headline_RoyScheider.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.sharkisstillworking.com/images/headline_RoyScheider.jpg" /></a><br /><em>with this immortal facial expression, Scheider convinced millions of moviegoers that "we're gonna need a bigger boat."</em><br /><br /><br />Sad to hear that actor Roy Scheider died a few<br /><br />hours ago in Little Rock. Scheider was<br /><br />very kind to me as a source in the spring of 2000<br /><br />when I was busy writing and reporting a feature story<br /><br />that had a fresh angle on the making of the<br /><br />movie "Jaws," in which, of course, he starred.<br /><br /><br /><br />I was so pleasantly surprised when he phoned me<br /><br />at home and started talking at length -- and with<br /><br />great humor and warmth -- about how "Jaws"<br /><br />came to be. My story ran in the San Francisco<br /><br />Chronicle on May 28, 2000, and here's the story<br /><br />I wrote (before my editor made a couple minor but<br /><br />counter-productive edits):<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Reconsidering "Jaws"<br /><br /><br />By Paul Iorio</strong><br /><br /><br />When Steven Spielberg's "Jaws" was released 25 years ago this<br /><br />summer, it was upstaged by its own mechanical shark and then by its<br /><br />unprecedented commercial success. Today, after decades of repeated<br /><br />viewing, it's easier to see the movie for what many think it really is:<br /><br />a quality thriller in league with such Alfred Hitchcock classics as<br /><br />"The Birds" and "Psycho."<br /><br /><br />What emerges from my own interviews with the film makers is that one<br /><br />of the best things to have happened during the making of "Jaws" was the<br /><br />malfunctioning of the main mechanical shark (and the two supporting<br /><br />sharks).<br /><br /><br />"The shark didn't work," actor Roy Scheider, who plays police chief<br /><br />Martin Brody, tells me. "And that left us with weeks and weeks<br /><br />and weeks to shoot, to polish, to improvise, to discuss, to enrich, to<br /><br />experiment with all the other scenes that in a movie like that would [usually]<br /><br />get a cursory treatment."<br /><br /><br />"What happened was, [Robert] Shaw, [Richard] Dreyfuss and Scheider<br /><br />turned into a little rep company," he says. "And all those scenes, rather than<br /><br />just pushing the plot along, became golden, enveloping the characters. So<br /><br />when the crisis came, you really cared about those three guys."<br /><br />Those "three guys" are by now familiar to moviegoers everywhere:<br /><br />Matt Hooper (Dreyfuss), an aggressive scientist from a wealthy family;<br /><br />Quint (Shaw), a veteran fisherman unhinged by past trauma; and Brody<br /><br />(Scheider), a phobic police chief from the big city trying to assimilate in<br /><br />small town Amity ("A fish out of water, if you'll excuse the expression,"<br /><br />quips Scheider).<br /><br /><br />Spielberg's problem in getting the shark to work was also one<br /><br />of the main reasons he didn't show the fish until very late in the movie<br /><br />(eighty minutes in, to be precise). This contradicts the generally accepted<br /><br />explanation that the delay in showing the shark was a purely aesthetic<br /><br />strategy meant to enhance audience anticipation and suspense.<br /><br /><br />"The shark didn't work," says screenwriter Carl Gottlieb, echoing<br /><br />Scheider's words exactly. "It was a difficult piece of mechanical<br /><br />equipment....It malfunctioned most of the time [so] we had no shark to<br /><br />shoot."<br /><br /><br />Spielberg and Gottlieb got the idea for withholding a glimpse of the<br /><br />monster until the end from the b-movie "The Thing," says Gottlieb. But<br /><br />the decision was more along the lines of, 'this is a way we can get around<br /><br />the fact that our main prop isn't working' rather than 'this is a choice<br /><br />that we would've made in any case,' according to Gottlieb.<br /><br /><br />Gottlieb's screenplay was based on a best-selling novel by Peter<br /><br />Benchley, though the finished film differs from the novel in significant<br /><br />ways.<br /><br /><br />Benchley initially wrote a couple drafts of the screenplay, before<br /><br />Pulitzer prize-winning playwright Howard Sackler ("The Great White Hope")<br /><br />took on the task, writing a couple drafts of his own. Finally Spielberg<br /><br />brought aboard Gottlieb, a comedy writer and actor who had won an Emmy<br /><br />for his work on TV's "The Smothers Brothers Show," to write the final<br /><br />script. Others also contributed to the screenplay, including Shaw, Scheider,<br /><br />Spielberg, and writer John Milius ("Apocalypse Now").<br /><br /><br />The script was another element that was inadvertently helped by the<br /><br />shark-related glitches, since the downtime gave Gottlieb more time to<br /><br />write and revise. And the screenplay did undergo lots of changes. Hooper's<br /><br />character (which was almost played by Jan-Michael Vincent instead of<br /><br />Dreyfuss) changed from a womanizer who had an affair with Brody's wife<br /><br />to that of the monomaniacal scientist in the film. Quint (almost played by<br /><br />Sterling Hayden) developed "from this crazy lunatic to this guy with a real<br /><br />reason to hate sharks," as Scheider puts it.<br /><br /><br />And Brody (a role originally sought by Charlton Heston) became an<br /><br />everyman rather than a conventional action hero. "Every aggressive and<br /><br />macho impulse I had in my character, [Spielberg] would grab me and pull<br /><br />me back and say, 'No, don't talk like that, don't speak like that. You<br /><br />are always afraid, you are Mr. Humble all the time,'" recalls Scheider.<br /><br />"He would say, 'What we want to do is gradually, slowly, carefully,<br /><br />humorously build this guy into being the hero of the movie.'"<br /><br /><br />The first scripts did not include the part of the film that Spielberg<br /><br />and many others consider to be the movie's best: the nine-minute<br /><br />sequence on the Orca that starts with the three main characters<br /><br />comparing scars, progresses through Quint's Indianapolis monologue, and<br /><br />ends with the three singing sea songs together.<br /><br /><br />How exactly did that sequence evolve? "Howard Sackler was the one<br /><br />who found the Indianapolis incident and introduced it into the script," says<br /><br />Gottlieb. "Scar-comparing comes out of a conversation that Spielberg had<br /><br />with John Milius. John said that macho beach guys would try to assert their<br /><br />manliness and would compare scars...So Steven said, 'Great, let's see if we<br /><br />can do something with that.' So I wrote the scar-comparing scene."<br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, several writers took a crack at Quint's Indianapolis speech,<br /><br />in which he tells of delivering the Hiroshima bomb aboard a ship that<br /><br />subsequently sank in shark-infested waters. "Steven was worried about the<br /><br />Indianapolis speech," says Gottlieb. "My drafts weren't satisfactory.<br /><br />Sackler's draft wasn't satisfactory to him."<br /><br /><br />"The conventional historical inaccuracy that has found its way into<br /><br />most of the literature about the movie is that Milius dictated the speech over<br /><br />the phone and that it's basically Milius's speech. I was on the phone taking<br /><br />notes and the speech is not Milius's speech. It's close, it's got elements of<br /><br />it. But what Milius was working from was my drafts and Sackler's drafts."<br /><br />[Milius did not respond to our request for comment on this.]<br /><br /><br />Gottlieb remembers the moment when the Indianapolis monologue was<br /><br />officially born. "One night after dinner, Spielberg, me, [and others] were<br /><br />talking about the movie," he says. "Shaw joined us after his dinner with a<br /><br />wad of paper in his pocket. He said, 'I've been having a go at that speech. I<br /><br />think I've got it now.'...The housekeeper had just packed up; she dimmed the<br /><br />lights as she left. Shaw takes the paper out of his pocket and then reads the<br /><br />speech as you hear it in the movie....He finishes performing that speech and<br /><br />everyone is in stunned silence. And finally Steven says, 'That's it, that's what<br /><br />we're going to shoot.'"<br /><br /><br />"It took two days to shoot that scene," says Gottlieb. "Shaw was<br /><br />drunk one day, sober the other. What you see on film was a very clever<br /><br />compendium of the two scenes....If you watch that scene, listen for the tap<br /><br />[on the table] because that's where it cuts from sober to drunk. Or drunk to<br /><br />sober, I don't remember which."<br /><br /><br />And indeed there is a tap on the table by Quint that splits the two parts<br /><br />of the Indianapolis monologue. Shaw appears to be drunk in the first six<br /><br />minutes of the sequence and sober in the last three minutes. (For those who<br /><br />want to locate the splice on video, it happens at the 91-minute mark,<br /><br />between the phrases "rip you to pieces" and "lost a hundred men.")<br /><br /><br />By all accounts, the shoot at sea, off Martha's Vineyard, was<br /><br />nightmarish and difficult. Originally, Spielberg expected to spend only 55<br /><br />days on the ocean but ultimately stayed for 159. At times, there was tension<br /><br />and conflict among the cast and crew. At one point, Gottlieb fell overboard<br /><br />and risked being sliced by a boat propeller.<br /><br /><br />Further, Spielberg insisted on having a clean horizon during the Orca<br /><br />sequences, in order to emphasize the boat's isolation at sea. If some vessel<br /><br />happened to be sailing in the background of a shot, Spielberg would have<br /><br />one of his crew drive a speed-boat a half-hour or so away to the offending<br /><br />craft to ask the sailor to consider taking another route. "A lot of times<br /><br />there was no other way to go, so they'd say, 'Fuck you,'" says Gottlieb.<br /><br />"So we had to wait for the boat to clear the horizon."<br /><br /><br />And if the film makers wanted some food while they waited, they<br /><br />had to settle for turkey and tuna sandwiches that had somehow lost their<br /><br />freshness in the heat and salt water at the bottom of the boat. They'd sip<br /><br />coffee that was sometimes four-hours old. And occasionally, the waves<br /><br />would cause the boat to pitch and bounce in place ("Not a great thing early<br /><br />in the morning on a sour stomach," says Gottlieb).<br /><br /><br />"You'd go home at the end of the day sea-sick, sunburned,<br /><br />windburned," says Gottlieb.<br /><br /><br />But when the main shark worked, it was a wonder to behold, says<br /><br />Scheider. He recalls the moment when he knew the movie was going to<br /><br />succeed: when he first saw the shark sail by the Orca on the open sea. "They<br /><br />ran [the shark] past the boat about two or three feet underwater," says<br /><br />Scheider. "And it was as long as the boat. And I said, 'Oh my god, it looks<br /><br />great.' I remember that day. We probably all lit cigars."<br /><br /><br />When the movie finally wrapped, nobody knew for sure whether it<br /><br />would succeed or fail. The first clue came when they brought the film to<br /><br />technical workers for color-timing purposes. The techies, who were looking<br /><br />at the film only for purposes of checking the color density of the negative,<br /><br />were almost literally scared out of their chairs during certain scenes. "Guys<br /><br />in the lab were jumping," says Gottlieb. "So we started to have a feeling."<br /><br /><br />Still, nobody was certain how the general public would respond. The<br /><br />tell-tale moment came during a sneak preview of the film in Long Beach,<br /><br />California, in the late spring of '75. Gottlieb remembers driving to<br /><br />Long Beach in a limo with his wife and Spielberg. "We gave Steven...tea to<br /><br />calm him down on the drive," says Gottlieb. "He was so nervous."<br /><br /><br />His nervousness apparently subsided about three minutes and forty<br /><br />seconds into the screening when the invisible shark ripped apart its first<br /><br />victim. The audience went nuts, drowning out dialogue for the next minute<br /><br />or so. "You could tell from the crowd reaction that it was going to be a very<br /><br />important movie," he says.<br /><br /><br />When the lights came up after the screening, top executives from<br /><br />Universal Pictures quickly headed straight to the theater restroom -- "the<br /><br />only quiet spot in the theater," says Gottlieb -- and proceeded to change<br /><br />the film's release strategy on the spot. Realizing they had a massive hit<br /><br />on their hands, the execs immediately decided the movie would not be opened<br /><br />in a normal gradual fashion, but in wide release. Amidst the summer toilets<br /><br />of Long Beach, movie industry history was made that night.<br /><br /><br />"The idea of opening a picture simultaneously on 1,500 to 2,000<br /><br />screens was unheard of," says Gottlieb. "After 'Jaws,' it became standard.<br /><br />Every studio had to have a big summer picture."<br /><br /><br />By mid-summer, the film was taking in a million dollars a day. Within<br /><br />a couple months, it had become the biggest grossing movie of all time.<br /><br />Today, its domestic gross stands at around $250 million, making it the<br /><br />13th top grossing movie of all time.<br /><br /><br />"I see it the same way I saw it then," says Scheider. "It's a very good<br /><br />action adventure film...Plus it's well-directed, it's well-acted, it's<br /><br />beautifully shot, it's got a great score and a fabulous story. So why shouldn't<br /><br />it be a classic movie?"<br /><br /><em><br />[this is my original manuscript; a slightly edited version ran in<br />the San Francisco Chronicle on May 28, 2000.]</em><br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 9, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>The Other Stars of February 9, 1964: The Chicks!</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhicQbnwlVkgOtUHRNXHK8e6R7DR7XNFZSil7EP_VsO4RiWwsxrCSxk8py_Z-tgGs_hLXPQ39QKUjYmNpO0o1TWErJOdhDlEZutjoJCspH1NRPCdod7iULuRf50hWyc-iJMJE3qghKMS7A/s1600-h/scanBEATLESGIRLTOPHED.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5164881970874089730" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhicQbnwlVkgOtUHRNXHK8e6R7DR7XNFZSil7EP_VsO4RiWwsxrCSxk8py_Z-tgGs_hLXPQ39QKUjYmNpO0o1TWErJOdhDlEZutjoJCspH1NRPCdod7iULuRf50hWyc-iJMJE3qghKMS7A/s400/scanBEATLESGIRLTOPHED.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br />Everyone knows the Beatles became megastars in America<br /><br />44 years ago, after performing on "The Ed Sulliavn Show"<br /><br />on February 9, 1964, but the other stars of the night,<br /><br />the ones who became minor pop culture icons in their<br /><br />own rights, were the screaming girls. Who can forget the<br /><br />cutaways to the teenagers (and tweenagers) in the audience:<br /><br />the modern-looking girl in horn rims, the one with braces who<br /><br />stuck out her tongue, the carbonated girl who couldn't<br /><br />stop jumping up and down? Who knows where they<br /><br />all are now. (Sorry, boys, they're all in their sixties<br /><br />at this point!)<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, here's a gallery of the Beatles girls from that<br /><br />legendary night:<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDAZDfCrCyc5UAnr2SIguU0BWNseO6GZ8mZBoV3Tj1DNwi4nKpDrmA9DgnY2iM2E9WIQub2Qb7SDbjfV4vkch7Oj2LQocD3gHzIMj3isfDj7NWa-z1I8VGq-Mt6gsHIRzHeIswMzkrI7U/s1600-h/scanbeatlestongue.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5164884917221654802" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDAZDfCrCyc5UAnr2SIguU0BWNseO6GZ8mZBoV3Tj1DNwi4nKpDrmA9DgnY2iM2E9WIQub2Qb7SDbjfV4vkch7Oj2LQocD3gHzIMj3isfDj7NWa-z1I8VGq-Mt6gsHIRzHeIswMzkrI7U/s400/scanbeatlestongue.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Who can forget Brace Face?</em><br />----<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyCFb7ykz-J6ZQp79UIdSrGxVl3uis8IQomI3HxrN2tmIlwbCWlU9SWbEH2QUVD9-FsQ7AE5gdE8Fz_7tBMonhBwinw2vJHt6IuTMGDUp8DSxpBwcx4vy65zWNEaFr4KtUHZnOCvlmAbo/s1600-h/scanBEATLESFANJUMPSUP.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5164886794122363170" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyCFb7ykz-J6ZQp79UIdSrGxVl3uis8IQomI3HxrN2tmIlwbCWlU9SWbEH2QUVD9-FsQ7AE5gdE8Fz_7tBMonhBwinw2vJHt6IuTMGDUp8DSxpBwcx4vy65zWNEaFr4KtUHZnOCvlmAbo/s400/scanBEATLESFANJUMPSUP.jpg" /></a><br /><em>She invented modern Pogoing!</em><br />----<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5TImhJ7zsWirdRNsm0cxuA5jSZxIRbrIJV_pRh2DRIOTZu-l0HTKzwAUjgXiyitBhyhADzYyE4Oqu3lg-2J2sK0wgcjA6gvxoOxgU2jD810dTbc7Gy50Sh7QdbD9QG8_YdcaGmub8G9U/s1600-h/scanBEATLESFANEARS.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5164888683907973426" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg5TImhJ7zsWirdRNsm0cxuA5jSZxIRbrIJV_pRh2DRIOTZu-l0HTKzwAUjgXiyitBhyhADzYyE4Oqu3lg-2J2sK0wgcjA6gvxoOxgU2jD810dTbc7Gy50Sh7QdbD9QG8_YdcaGmub8G9U/s400/scanBEATLESFANEARS.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Covering her ears, but not her emotions!</em><br />----<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBa_2houP_Z7I_qPjMwzeWV_nj8a0PDgL8EPQL_HJ7qm3q9pyPquWc8qQfCWsq_9tRVJuPcPMF7820JghOkutV93cPpPOUj31YSSnIuzGqT-ACjdpm5Zrfray8TRjs8Zxd3UuA17G8HGQ/s1600-h/scanBEATLESPURESUGAR.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5164890543628812610" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBa_2houP_Z7I_qPjMwzeWV_nj8a0PDgL8EPQL_HJ7qm3q9pyPquWc8qQfCWsq_9tRVJuPcPMF7820JghOkutV93cPpPOUj31YSSnIuzGqT-ACjdpm5Zrfray8TRjs8Zxd3UuA17G8HGQ/s400/scanBEATLESPURESUGAR.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Pure sugar: this cutaway shot shows the crowd just<br />as the Beatles take the stage for the first time (notice<br />how every girl's mouth is open in unison). </em><br /><br />----<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvX0X6VMygqd3CXkeqF4Pj7YnVpoZnXaHuBXcXlcuqAavOccHGyUeXXheR7PFX6MXHb0dplAH1TNou7omaHfqBYksIuWbZclZRxCmII0KZouW_2y2Y17wRJMtAzplVEIVXQhIR0ZmGKms/s1600-h/scanBEATLESLENNON.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5164892162831483218" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvX0X6VMygqd3CXkeqF4Pj7YnVpoZnXaHuBXcXlcuqAavOccHGyUeXXheR7PFX6MXHb0dplAH1TNou7omaHfqBYksIuWbZclZRxCmII0KZouW_2y2Y17wRJMtAzplVEIVXQhIR0ZmGKms/s400/scanBEATLESLENNON.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Sorry, girls, he's been assassinated. </em><br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 6, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />A few quick notes on Super Tuesday:<br /><br /><br />-- Yes, Huckabee, the jihadist candidate, surprised<br /><br />everyone with his strong showing among holy rollers,<br /><br />people who believe Creation just took one night,<br /><br />but he's still far, far behind McCain, who'll almost<br /><br />certainly be the GOP nominee.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Romney will almost surely have a "brainwashed" moment<br /><br />(it runs in the family, you know) in which he says he<br /><br />has seen the light and will not continue to spend his<br /><br />family's inheritance on what now is a vanity run for the<br /><br />presidency.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Some pundit (I don't remember who) said it best:<br /><br />if Super Tuesday had been on Thursday, Obama would have<br /><br />won a majority of the delegates at stake that day.<br /><br />Obama could still capture the nomination, what with<br /><br />all the arcane party rules about super-delegates and<br /><br />proportional allotment -- plus his own growing momentum.<br /><br />His loss of California was a stunner; I wrongly predicted<br /><br />an Obama win in Calif., not understanding the extent of<br /><br />Hillary's support in Hispanic areas. (I was looking<br /><br />at the Obama-mania in my own area, which doesn't have<br /><br />many Hispanics.)<br /><br /><br /><br />-- By the way, kudos to Ted Kennedy for taking time<br /><br />to speak at a church on a blighted block of Oakland<br /><br />last Friday. As I walked around the neighborhood near<br /><br />the gathering (I didn't have time to hear him speak but<br /><br />did drop by the event), I thought that he could have<br /><br />taken the easy route and made the usual appearance at<br /><br />someplace cushy like the Hyatt or the Commonwealth Club,<br /><br />but instead he cared enough to visit an area that<br /><br />obviously needs revitalization. I mean, across from<br /><br />the church where Kennedy spoke was a boarded-up and<br /><br />apparently burned-out building, and elsewhere was other<br /><br />vivid evidence of urban rot.<br /><br /><br /><br />And I thought: parts of this area look sort of like<br /><br />the aftermath of Katrina. It looked like a Katrina<br /><br />of neglect. A Katrina of neglect duplicated in<br /><br />almost every major city in Amercia.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for February 1, 2008<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2v-sgtmO9cF8AEEhkv-oa15P7G80XeO-ieFNNmK4oW5ZFuPwTvU2yTpuDpG3oIOzW1rJVtwTZ81t5OUn0PgF1dMX0VdBCEXdz53JJQ_TzsR5ZYLO5SAMWKGDtdVuNPN8NVqoy1l327Is/s1600-h/OBAMASTORE2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5162061822036126130" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2v-sgtmO9cF8AEEhkv-oa15P7G80XeO-ieFNNmK4oW5ZFuPwTvU2yTpuDpG3oIOzW1rJVtwTZ81t5OUn0PgF1dMX0VdBCEXdz53JJQ_TzsR5ZYLO5SAMWKGDtdVuNPN8NVqoy1l327Is/s400/OBAMASTORE2.jpg" /></a><em>the Barack Industrial Complex is alive and well in northern California!</em><br /><br /><br />I don't know who the pollsters are talking to or<br /><br />what their methodologies are, but I do know that<br /><br />Barack Obama will win the California primary on<br /><br />Tuesday. As I've been saying since last March,<br /><br />in this column and elsewhere, there is absolutely<br /><br />no evident enthusiasm for Hillary's candidacy in<br /><br />the Golden State, no yard signs for Hillary,<br /><br />very few bumper stickers for her -- and that's still<br /><br />the case. But Barack signs and stickers are<br /><br />everywhere, and leafletters enthusiastically hand<br /><br />out copies of his latest speeches in front of local<br /><br />supermarkets as if they were the next installments<br /><br />in the Harry Potter series or newly uncovered Beatles<br /><br />singles.<br /><br /><br /><br />No, Barack will win here on Tuesday, and the only<br /><br />suspense, it seems, is whether he'll win by a large<br /><br />margin or a small one. Granted, I live in a very<br /><br />liberal pocket of the state, but, even so,<br /><br />it seems as if Hillary is showing no strength<br /><br />even amongst her base of graying feminist pioneers.<br /><br /><br /><br />Last night's debate made it obvious that we're<br /><br />now looking at the Democratic ticket,<br /><br />and Tuesday's primaries will determine only the order<br /><br />of the ticket.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br />I have decided who I'm going to vote for on<br /><br />Tuesday, but I don't want to publicly endorse<br /><br />anyone, and that's because I'd like to cover the<br /><br />upcoming campaign as a reporter for publications<br /><br />other than my own Daily Digression, and I don't<br /><br />want to be seen as an advocate for any one<br /><br />candidate.<br /><br /><br /><br />However, I'll give you a hint as to who I'm voting<br /><br />for: with regard to the Democratic contest, I<br /><br />think the progressive agenda might be better served<br /><br />by a brand new strong persuader in the White House,<br /><br />someone who hasn't already failed to build the<br /><br />coalitions necessary to pass universal health care<br /><br />legislation, etc.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />P.S. -- By the way, the description of last night's<br /><br />debate as a "one-on-one" debate is sort of a misnomer.<br /><br />I mean, a one-on-one debate would be a<br /><br />debate in which Clinton and Obama are on a stage asking<br /><br />each other questions without a moderator or outside<br /><br />interviewers (not a bad idea, actually).<br /><br /><br /><br />When I, as a journalist, label one of my interviews a<br /><br />one-on-one interview, I'm referring to the fact that I<br /><br />interviewed the person without anyone else being<br /><br />in the room (see: my interviews with Heath Ledger,<br /><br />Woody Allen, Annette Bening, etc.). Last night's debate<br /><br />didn't fall in that category.<br /><br /><br /><em>[photo of Obama Store by Paul Iorio.]</em><br /><br />_____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 28, 2008<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP6WjtScXN0_Rtpwlv09zsEwdAvSpeAwH_VmMvuQV50Kxkp8qly-lV6TJn4uRa0kFKrGMP1iSxeSS11xdc8gG3wJ8jFCRFXCH2je9LNr6evNfsaXNJWL6I7hvczYtvtyLtrv9UYfGOZ3Q/s1600-h/scanKENNEDYFAMILY.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160616174698998130" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP6WjtScXN0_Rtpwlv09zsEwdAvSpeAwH_VmMvuQV50Kxkp8qly-lV6TJn4uRa0kFKrGMP1iSxeSS11xdc8gG3wJ8jFCRFXCH2je9LNr6evNfsaXNJWL6I7hvczYtvtyLtrv9UYfGOZ3Q/s400/scanKENNEDYFAMILY.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Our first female president should've been the second one from far right. </em><br /><br /><br /><br />It has long been my opinion that the first female<br /><br />president of the U.S. should have been Caroline<br /><br />Kennedy's mother, Jacqueline, a woman of<br /><br />intelligence and great style and courage. (By<br /><br />the way, Jacqueline Kennedy is also the only Kennedy<br /><br />I've ever personally seen close-up; in the fall<br /><br />of 1981, when I was briefly working at the editorial<br /><br />headquarters of Doubleday in Manhattan, I passed<br /><br />right by her in the hallway, and I remember how<br /><br />incredibly elegant she was and how she somehow reminded<br /><br />me of the Eiffel Tower.)<br /><br /><br /><br />But, sadly, she is no longer with us, and so<br /><br />we have to choose from the current field of candidates.<br /><br /><br /><br />Caroline Kennedy's endorsement of Barack Obama<br /><br />proves, if there was ever any doubt, that Hillary<br /><br />Clinton is not the feminist icon she's been cracked<br /><br />up to be and is not even the candidate that most<br /><br />progressive women are supporting. Womyn may be<br /><br />supporting Hillary, but women are not. (Womyn are<br /><br />older females who were shaped by the rough draft of<br /><br />early 1970s feminism rather than by the version of<br /><br />feminism that was revised and amended in subsequent<br /><br />decades.)<br /><br /><br /><br />Let me put it a bit more vividly than many of my<br /><br />readers would like: the main organ responsible for<br /><br />a successful presidency is a couple feet north of<br /><br />the vagina. Having a vagina does not necessarily mean<br /><br />that you can push a feminist agenda more successfully<br /><br />than someone with a penis. If Liddy Dole were our<br /><br />first female president, she would not be a feminist<br /><br />icon and would not even be seen as serving the<br /><br />interests of women on issues like abortion rights,<br /><br />gender segregation, etc.<br /><br /><br /><br />Further, a mediocre female candidate, progressive or<br /><br />not, is still a mediocre candidate. Witness Geraldine<br /><br />Ferraro. (Who?, many younger readers might be asking.)<br /><br />Ferraro is almost completely forgotten today by just<br /><br />about everybody (except womyn, of course) -- or, more<br /><br />accurately, is about as well-known today as William Miller,<br /><br />Barry Goldwater's running mate in 1964. And for good<br /><br />reason: she pioneered nothing, took no brave stands, put<br /><br />out no original ideas, and came across as insufferably<br /><br />local. (In fact, if she's known at all today by the<br /><br />general public, it's probably because of the controversy<br /><br />involving her husband -- which shows how easily she<br /><br />could be outshone.)<br /><br /><br />All this means the following: being the first female<br /><br />anything is no virtue or achievement if you're not good at<br /><br />the job in the first place. I mean, there are plenty of female<br /><br />Dan Quayles out there, and we shouldn't be giving such<br /><br />people 10 extra points just because they have a clitoris.<br /><br /><br /><br />In the 1990s, there was a mystique about Hillary born of<br /><br />the mythology that she was somehow the brainy, underemployed,<br /><br />mastermind of all that Bill did. But now that the curtain<br /><br />has been parted, and we can actually see Hillary in harsh<br /><br />light, we realize that the opposite is true, that the real<br /><br />mastermind behind the Clinton administration, and behind<br /><br />Hillary's own "work," was President Clinton.<br /><br /><br /><br />Her candidacy is looking more and more like a "front"<br /><br />candidacy, in which she fronts the ticket for the true<br /><br />contender, her husband (how unfeminist!), who -- rest<br /><br />assured, dear voters -- will be running things in the<br /><br />WH if she's elected in November.<br /><br /><br /><br />But a Hillary administration may not be as much of a<br /><br />third Clinton term as you might think. For example,<br /><br />if, say, bin Laden's location is pinpointed in Yemen,<br /><br />and Bill comes into the Oval Office and says, "Hillary,<br /><br />I think we should do an airstrike inside Yemen right<br /><br />now," Hillary might just as likely say, in her scolding tone,<br /><br />"Bill, I'm running things, not you, and I'll be deciding<br /><br />whether I'm going to strike or not." And out of spite<br /><br />or vain self-assertion, she might decide to override<br /><br />Bill's smart suggestion just to show she, not he, is in<br /><br />charge. Hence, a Hillary presidency might actually<br /><br />(and dangerously) veer away from Bill's judgment<br /><br />(even when Bill is correct) -- and for no good reason.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLYP6tIsdb1ogSqcTxpFoiZ2TjQPh1tQgBhE8AYTAFr8hGTXLnm8gpWSluKLZq1a-3lN-r2J-JVIeRelfj7EpKBbCYDRNwNpXYIVAFcQFMdmrAeDepMeiQtuj-AZwT5iCDPr9SCu9VnvA/s1600-h/scanFERRARO.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160556994344626530" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLYP6tIsdb1ogSqcTxpFoiZ2TjQPh1tQgBhE8AYTAFr8hGTXLnm8gpWSluKLZq1a-3lN-r2J-JVIeRelfj7EpKBbCYDRNwNpXYIVAFcQFMdmrAeDepMeiQtuj-AZwT5iCDPr9SCu9VnvA/s400/scanFERRARO.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Hillary is not the first mediocre female candidate to have run for national office</em><br /><br />--<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX1f0lmz9c1o9CZVy-c9pbOsTZ9aYgT6Hy_gWgfP6qLcWZEi6ldQT0F7vOJdrZMMpTKDB6ECI2tkNCHPgfVGVUMU-ndoMGv1RmkvYRQQafz6bb2iEtGBTrsUyxXjY1iSkCKZmpR5kUbHo/s1600-h/scanjacqueline.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5160641467761404306" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhX1f0lmz9c1o9CZVy-c9pbOsTZ9aYgT6Hy_gWgfP6qLcWZEi6ldQT0F7vOJdrZMMpTKDB6ECI2tkNCHPgfVGVUMU-ndoMGv1RmkvYRQQafz6bb2iEtGBTrsUyxXjY1iSkCKZmpR5kUbHo/s400/scanjacqueline.jpg" /></a><br /><em>ah, the days when the term dynastic royalty actually meant something</em><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 25, 2008<br /><br /><br />As things now stand, here's my prediction of how<br /><br />the headlines will look on November 5, 2008:<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIaVt8-898MPsWojpvjEfRwVqE0To7MRqzWJBVEIWYN1C5KHWUfC8eaL4Hti78x1m2ZdSo95LpSnA9KDqtZx3O-LDfpvdIXY0frye-El8F4D92PLF8fVszJR65y_XIrpXm1IRwIRsRDe8/s1600-h/scanELECTIONDAY.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5159206652331796818" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIaVt8-898MPsWojpvjEfRwVqE0To7MRqzWJBVEIWYN1C5KHWUfC8eaL4Hti78x1m2ZdSo95LpSnA9KDqtZx3O-LDfpvdIXY0frye-El8F4D92PLF8fVszJR65y_XIrpXm1IRwIRsRDe8/s400/scanELECTIONDAY.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>The Thinking Behind My Electoral Map and Math</strong><br /><br /><br />First, Wisconsin. If Dems sneeze, they lose it, which<br /><br />is why you hear nothing about gun control<br /><br />during prez election years, seeing how all those<br /><br />moose lodgers in Wisc love their guns and all. This<br /><br />year, the male vote will tilt it the third of a percentage<br /><br />required for McCain to win the state.<br /><br /><br /><br />Second, New Hampshire only went Kerry because Mass. was<br /><br />next door; Hillary has no such advantage.<br /><br /><br /><br />Third, just as Gore lost Tennessee in '00, so Hillary<br /><br />will lose Arkansas. She's really not of Arkansas the<br /><br />way Bill is, and she turned her back on the state to<br /><br />run from NY, so Ark will return the favor come Nov.<br /><br /><br /><br />Fourth, Louisiana, Missouri and Iowa are never really<br /><br />in play for the Dems unless a Perot is siphoning votes<br /><br />from the GOP, though Katrina may have changed the<br /><br />calculus slightly in LA.<br /><br /><br /><br />Fifth, Ohio is almost always 5 points from the Dems's<br /><br />reach, and will be so this time, too.<br /><br /><br /><br />Sixth, a Florida win for Hillary requires a majority<br /><br />of swing voters along the I-4 corridor, which will<br /><br />give her 45 percent of the vote -- tops (I know<br /><br />because I used to live around there).<br /><br /><br />Seventh: oops! Should have added Maine to<br /><br />the McCain column on above map.<br /><br /><br /><br />Eighth, all other states are self-explanatory.<br /><br /><br /><br />Ninth, Barack would fare even worse, though not<br /><br />as badly as you might think; on a good day for<br /><br />Obama, take the above electoral map and add Minnesota<br /><br />to McCain's column. But there would inevitably be<br /><br />dirty TV ads against Obama by the Republicans that<br /><br />would run in heavy rotation around Halloween in key<br /><br />swing states like Minnesota, Michigan and Wisconsin,<br /><br />and they'd go something like this: "Can America Trust<br /><br />Barack Hussein Obama?" would be the refrain, with the<br /><br />final frame featuring Obama embracing Al Sharpton.<br /><br />Whoever Obama taps as his veep, the GOP would see<br /><br />to it, through negative commercials, that his real<br /><br />running-mate in the eyes of swing state voters is Al<br /><br />Sharpton. Barack could mitigate this possibility<br /><br />slightly by having a Sistah Soldier moment with<br /><br />Sharpton, but the ads would still eat<br /><br />into his totals in the upper midwest, at least.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>Not That There's Anything Wrong With That</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />How to put this. Time and again I've watched<br /><br />interview footage featuring Hillary Clinton and seen<br /><br />the same thing, and maybe I should shut up<br /><br />about it, but then again I'm a reporter, and reporters<br /><br />are in the business of revealing, not concealing.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, back to the interview footage. Whenever Hillary<br /><br />is interviewed by a drop-dead gorgeous woman, and this has<br /><br />happened many times, Hillary sort of blushes and loses her<br /><br />breath and sort of looks away and becomes somewhat shy in<br /><br />the manner of someone who -- how to put this? -- has a<br /><br />special appreciation of or passion for feminine beauty.<br /><br />In other words, she sort of reminds me of how I, a<br /><br />hetero male, react when I sit down and talk with a<br /><br />super-model sort of woman. (You know how it is,<br /><br />it's always sort of impossible to hide how you feel,<br /><br />and it tends to come through even when you try to cover<br /><br />it up.) Thing is, she doesn't seem to respond that<br /><br />way to other interviewers, for whom she does her usual<br /><br />bug-eyed thing.<br /><br /><br /><br />And I'm talking about her involuntary, reflexive<br /><br />reactions, as opposed to her conscious, deliberate<br /><br />responses.<br /><br /><br /><br />So what I am trying to say? I guess I'm observing that the<br /><br />person who might become our 44th president appears to have<br /><br />a, uh, special appreciation of feminine beauty -- not a bad<br /><br />thing. And that her election may possibly -- just<br /><br />possibly -- be a first for <em>two </em>groups.<br /><br /><br /><br />By the way, seeing how things in this column tend<br /><br />to get around (and are stolen by the<br /><br />same publications that reject my findings when I<br /><br />pitch them), I bet the Hillary camp neutralizes<br /><br />this by having her hug both a gorgeous actress<br /><br /><em>and </em>her hunky husband at a campaign<br /><br />event -- on camera, of course. Or stage photos in<br /><br />which women are looking adoringly at Hillary instead<br /><br />of vice versa. Or something like that.<br /><br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />My favorite headline of the week: CJR's "To Check the<br /><br />Facts, You Need the Facts," which tops a story that<br /><br />fact-checks one TV network's fact-checking. Leave<br /><br />it to the CJ Review to see through the<br /><br />daily chronicle of distortions and lies by<br /><br />official sources.<br /><br /><br /><br />Remember, this is an era when people see the<br /><br />Virgin Mary in a coffee stain and UFOs in every<br /><br />wisp of smoke, so fact-based perception and<br /><br />analysis are in short supply everywhere these<br /><br />days. Add to that the fact that several<br /><br />major news organizations don't even discipline<br /><br />the plagiarists in their number, much less the<br /><br />people who merely get their facts wrong.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[above graphic by Paul Iorio.]</em><br /><br />__________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 22, 2008<br /><br /><br /><em>Remembering Heath Ledger</em><br /><br /><strong>My Unpublished (or Mostly Unpublished)<br />Interview with Ledger</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9SAhyX1KhFZWfjx4DFMv8jeIVH8lS5FOYKIZVB18faEpfkWZc5SeYMobs5QpelFLI38yj_RPYaipGaRddo4JSzd0VkUjBGI9ct1i2Mj53WcETZcstyJ3ojW_GxMaNWXfjFEW5AnyC7d4/s1600-h/scanHEATHPICTURE.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5158677061389363522" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9SAhyX1KhFZWfjx4DFMv8jeIVH8lS5FOYKIZVB18faEpfkWZc5SeYMobs5QpelFLI38yj_RPYaipGaRddo4JSzd0VkUjBGI9ct1i2Mj53WcETZcstyJ3ojW_GxMaNWXfjFEW5AnyC7d4/s400/scanHEATHPICTURE.jpg" /></a><br /><br />What a shock and a tragedy to hear that Heath<br /><br />Ledger died today.<br /><br /><br /><br />It wasn't very long ago when I was sitting<br /><br />around with Ledger in some hotel room in Beverly Hills,<br /><br />conducting a one-on-one interview with the actor<br /><br />for a story that I wrote and reported for the<br /><br />San Francisco Chronicle. He was 21 then and rising<br /><br />fast, so it hardly seems believable that he's<br /><br />already gone.<br /><br /><br /><br />To remember him, I'm posting here most of my<br /><br />interview with Ledger, which has been unpublished<br /><br />until now (except for 80 words of it, which I used<br /><br />in one of my stories for a newspaper).<br /><br /><br /><br />My interview with Ledger happened on June 3, 2000,<br /><br />and my story on him -- also posted below -- ran in the<br /><br />San Francisco Chronicle's June 25 - July 1, 2000 issue.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>PAUL IORIO: I SAW ['THE PATRIOT"] LAST NIGHT.</strong><br /><br />HEATH LEDGER: Yeah, so did I.<br /><br /><br /><strong>IORIO: WERE YOU AT THE [SCREENING]?</strong><br /><br />LEDGER: Yeah. I was there. Snuck in.<br /><br /><br /><strong>IORIO: SO YOU GOT TO HEAR AUDIENCE REACTION AND ALL THAT?</strong><br /><br />LEDGER: I was too consumed with the movie [laughs].<br /><br /><br /><strong>WHAT WAS YOUR OPINION OF IT?</strong><br /><br />I loved it. Huge. Shit! Massive. Epic.<br /><br /><br /><strong>[DO YOU THINK] IT LOOKS LIKE IT'S GOING TO BE A<br />"BRAVEHEART" KIND OF SUCCESS STORY?</strong><br /><br />I have no expectations for what the movie's going to do.<br /><br /><em>[Ledger tries lighting a cigarette with a final match.]<br /></em>That was the last match, too.<br /><br /><br /><strong>SECOND MATCH, NOTED FOR THE RECORD. AND SMOKING A<br />MARLBORO, HE IS. SO WHAT'S THE MOVIE IN WHICH<br />YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO SMOKE. THAT'S "TEN THINGS" --</strong><br /><br />"Ten Things I Hate About You."<br /><br /><br /><strong>RIGHT. THERE'S A SCENE IN THERE WHERE SHE'LL GO OUT WITH<br />YOU ONLY IF YOU AGREE TO --</strong><br /><br />Quit smoking.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>HOW DID YOU GET THE AUDITION [FOR "THE PATRIOT"]?</strong><br /><br />...The first reading I did was fucked. I went in there, I had two<br />scenes to prepare, and I was halfway through the second scene and I<br />dropped my head and I just said, "I'm sorry, I'm wasting your time,<br />I'm really embarrassed, God, I'm so sorry, I'm wasting your time and<br />I'm wasting my time, I'm sorry, if you want me to come back, I'll<br />come back and do it, but I gotta leave." And I walked out with my<br />head down and my tail between my legs.<br /><br /><br /><strong>WELL, THAT'S NO WAY TO GET THE PART! I MEAN, CERTAINLY<br />THEY MUST HAVE SAID, "FORGET HIM." AND THEN YOU CAME BACK?</strong><br /><br />Yeah, they called me back.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>THEY CALLED YOU BACK EVEN THOUGH YOU TOLD WHO --</strong><br /><br />[The director] Roland [Emmerich] and [the producer] Dean<br />[Devlin] --<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>[TOLD THEM] THAT "I CAN'T HANDLE THIS RIGHT NOW"'?</strong><br /><br />'Cause I was doing a lousy reading. I was just, like, not<br />there, and my morale was down by my feet.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>WHERE DO YOU LIVE NOW?</strong><br /><br />Well, I was in the States for about two and a half years. I<br />was in L.A. And then I packed up my stuff in L.A., closed down my<br />home and went to South Carolina to shoot "Patriot." And after<br />that I had two months off, so I went and fucked off to New York<br />and hung out there for a bit. And then I went straight from<br />New York to Prague, and I was there for two months...where I'm<br />shooting "A Knight's Tale." And I've got eight days off now<br />to do all this shit and then I go back and have another two months<br />there [in Prague] and then I've got two weeks off and I go to<br />Morocco for four months to do "The Four Feathers" That's why I<br />don't really have a home right now, I'm just living out of bags.<br />Which is kind of the way I've been for the last five years, I've<br />kind of been on the road, living out of bags, which is good.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>WHERE DO YOU TEND TO LIVE ONCE THE DUST SETTLES?</strong><br /><br />I don't know. I don't look that far ahead in the future. I<br />choose not to. If you live in the future or the past you<br />lose touch with the now. So I generally live every minute of<br />every day in the present. I don't have a diary, I don't have<br />a journal, I don't know what I'm doing tomorrow. I don't what<br />I'm doing after this. That's good. And it keeps<br />my life fresh and exciting. <em>[coughs] </em><br /><br /><br /><strong>...WHAT'S YOUR VIEW OF...PEOPLE WHO [OBJECT TO THE VIOLENCE<br />IN "THE PATRIOT"]?</strong><br /><br />Well, they're all fucking idiots because they let their kids<br />watch fucking TV, they let their kids play computer games and<br />rip heads off people. They're hypocrites....It's ridiculous.<br />If they're going to complain about that, let them. Fuck<br />them, because, really, the world is so full of fucking shit<br />and chaos right now it's not funny. You put on the TV. I don't<br />watch TV. I haven't watched TV in fucking years. I don't have<br />one. I have one only for movies. I have a DVD and a video<br />player. I don't hook it up to fucking cable, nothing. It's<br />trash. And if they think ["The Patriot" is] trash, well,<br />fuck, there's something wrong. With computer games and all<br />that shit?! That's ridiculous. They don't have to worry about<br />this. They have to worry about the shit from the electronic<br />nanny they sit their kids down in front of so they don't have<br />to worry about their kids, so they don't have to create shit<br />for them to do and let them use their imagination and go, "hey,<br />go outside and run around in the garden." No, stick them in<br />front of here and you don't have to worry about them. They<br />can go fuck off. Fuck 'em. We're not teaching kids to do<br />[violence]. We're telling a story, that's all.<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdWOSiUKTfCIUjKUci4RNsthtirnfR5RDa8iVcZLtwkwROpIrIKM4Rj-GggJZoOefgZXNUhyMjq-qstMkiptkIKuWYBfQjTBW8rZtb5o6HgRUAqb6O8527GDJJWPzZMrXsuiJW2WZbKMg/s1600-h/scanHEATHLEDGER.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5158551957581965602" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdWOSiUKTfCIUjKUci4RNsthtirnfR5RDa8iVcZLtwkwROpIrIKM4Rj-GggJZoOefgZXNUhyMjq-qstMkiptkIKuWYBfQjTBW8rZtb5o6HgRUAqb6O8527GDJJWPzZMrXsuiJW2WZbKMg/s400/scanHEATHLEDGER.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><em>[top photo of Ledger is a still from the movie "The Patriot"; photographer unknown.]</em><br /><br />_______________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 21, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong>Remember Martin Luther King, Jr. Today!</strong><br /><br /><br />To commemorate King, I'm re-running the Daily<br /><br />Digression of September 6, 2007, which talks<br /><br />about a television appearance by King. Here it is:<br /><br /><br /><br />I recently watched the uncut version of the<br /><br />Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.'s appearance in 1967 on<br /><br />"The Merv Griffin Show," in which he talked at length about his<br /><br />opposition to the Vietnam War. And it's truly astonishing<br /><br />footage, if only because almost everything Rev. King<br /><br />said on that show about the Vietnam War could easily apply<br /><br />today to American involvement in Iraq (e.g., that the U.S.<br /><br />is involving itself in someone else's civil war, that the<br /><br />"enemy" is not monolithic, that an escalation or surge is<br /><br />not the solution, etc.). In fact, it might be interesting to<br /><br />get a transcript of his remarks and replace the word Vietnam<br /><br />with the word Iraq.<br /><br /><br />And by the way, what also emerges from that interview<br /><br />is how truly brilliant and unflappable and dignified<br /><br />and poetic Martin Luther King was. Truly Lincolnesque.<br /><br />(And modest, too; he insisted that his father<br /><br />was the number one pastor at their church in Atlanta,<br /><br />and he himself was merely his number two.) As revered as he is<br /><br />today, he's still underrated (and, frankly, I couldn't<br /><br />help but think that, in a perfect world, he should have<br /><br />been the Democratic nominee for president in 1968).<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />__________________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 16, 2008<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsFY_PFdCLDLogIDYnwKjNBCMYtm0egDx7AV0v9iymYxGyUNUOAr2NoYv-15SIa-ZEudGGcvVgcX-xoO5N3HeSCuAmvC_inrRNm_aiUl4SIHazc1EQgsLwAWxiluuPl4vt9z5AtodP-g4/s1600-h/scanGOPPAYER.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5156265235733183874" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsFY_PFdCLDLogIDYnwKjNBCMYtm0egDx7AV0v9iymYxGyUNUOAr2NoYv-15SIa-ZEudGGcvVgcX-xoO5N3HeSCuAmvC_inrRNm_aiUl4SIHazc1EQgsLwAWxiluuPl4vt9z5AtodP-g4/s400/scanGOPPAYER.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuCQfk6gEC5klKEKPA9JWgk6sQNg6mKM8oYMNbRLDYZCdCakSQYOrd58Lm2FQzO1e5KlNYP_nTdRBHYjawhccQlYh19XKIIkm-eRLtOey9XdHSry4VvfpY1qcHK-G5JoF46dOL1ymcm7w/s1600-h/scangophuckabee.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5156266378194484626" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuCQfk6gEC5klKEKPA9JWgk6sQNg6mKM8oYMNbRLDYZCdCakSQYOrd58Lm2FQzO1e5KlNYP_nTdRBHYjawhccQlYh19XKIIkm-eRLtOey9XdHSry4VvfpY1qcHK-G5JoF46dOL1ymcm7w/s400/scangophuckabee.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimMSJqmkagaOOr35xcIkw1n42u6hdzAiHP9MCZQbrDNKCwxuXqteNEC5BHxUQoUIF-RWUx5L_g3kKbKQd4aPowXinPr9u2Hte7e3kKRGGiukfjxPyp6LN1XahdYeYBT_LLd5KeTPGpRHI/s1600-h/scangopromney.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5156267550720556450" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimMSJqmkagaOOr35xcIkw1n42u6hdzAiHP9MCZQbrDNKCwxuXqteNEC5BHxUQoUIF-RWUx5L_g3kKbKQd4aPowXinPr9u2Hte7e3kKRGGiukfjxPyp6LN1XahdYeYBT_LLd5KeTPGpRHI/s400/scangopromney.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em><em>[all three graphics above by Paul Iorio, though the praying hands are<br />from assumptionmthealthy.com and the golf ball from north-cyprus-properties.com.]</em></em><br /><br />__________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 21, 2008<br /><br /><br />Happy Martin Luther King, Jr. Day!<br /><br /><br />To commemorate King, I'm re-running the Daily<br /><br />Digression of September 6, 2007, which talks<br /><br />about a television appearance by King. Here it is:<br /><br /><br />I recently watched the uncut version of the<br /><br />Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.'s appearance in 1967 on<br /><br />"The Merv Griffin Show," in which he talked at length about his<br /><br />opposition to the Vietnam War. And it's truly astonishing<br /><br />footage, if only because almost everything Rev. King<br /><br />said on that show about the Vietnam War could easily apply<br /><br />today to American involvement in Iraq (e.g., that the U.S.<br /><br />is involving itself in someone else's civil war, that the<br /><br />"enemy" is not monolithic, that an escalation or surge is<br /><br />not the solution, etc.). In fact, it might be interesting to<br /><br />get a transcript of his remarks and replace the word Vietnam<br /><br />with the word Iraq.<br /><br /><br />And by the way, what also emerges from that interview<br /><br />is how truly brilliant and unflappable and dignified<br /><br />and poetic Martin Luther King was. Truly Lincolnesque.<br /><br />(And modest, too; he insisted that his father<br /><br />was the number one pastor at their church in Atlanta,<br /><br />and he himself was merely his number two.) As revered as he is<br /><br />today, he's still underrated (and, frankly, I couldn't<br /><br />help but think that, in a perfect world, he should have<br /><br />been the Democratic nominee for president in 1968).<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />__________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 15, 2008<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj_3ORoTA5uRUDJQJQt_UN7iBvMnX9HKLJjcRfktUY54lePLOdR5Lkcg-pfHsKaBucyCgxamEn0fyRuGiDYuhMiasLAlR7DQAmzs1A80QcmzynmVncYhMRRHQfWZivJo2WSYEJmD88Qw/s1600-h/scancalifprimary.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5155859554597240178" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgj_3ORoTA5uRUDJQJQt_UN7iBvMnX9HKLJjcRfktUY54lePLOdR5Lkcg-pfHsKaBucyCgxamEn0fyRuGiDYuhMiasLAlR7DQAmzs1A80QcmzynmVncYhMRRHQfWZivJo2WSYEJmD88Qw/s400/scancalifprimary.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br />Received my official ballot for the California Presidential<br /><br />Primary Election the other day and was, as usual, sort of<br /><br />amused by the presence of dozens of minor or completely<br /><br />unknown contenders running as third, fourth, fifth and<br /><br />even sixth party candidates.<br /><br /><br /><br />So I decided to check out the official websites of several of them.<br /><br /><br /><br />Two presidential contenders -- former Congresswoman Cynthia<br /><br />McKinney, who thinks UFOs flew into the twin towers on 9/11<br /><br />(isn't that what she thinks?), and Ralph Nader, who makes people<br /><br />want to go out and buy a Corvair -- appear on the ballot<br /><br />twice, in both the Green party and the Peace & Freedom party<br /><br />categories.<br /><br /><br /><br />Here are bits from the more obscure candidates' websites:<br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Mad Max Riekse of the American Independent Party. </strong><br /><br />Mad Max is also running for president in 2012, in case you were<br /><br />wondering. He's from a place called Fruitport, Michigan. Notable quotes<br /><br />from Mad Max include: "Get the MM word out" and "Don't get<br /><br />involved with other people's politics or wars." His website has had<br /><br />1,121 hits.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Jared Ball of the Green Party.</strong><br /><br />An assistant prof. Qualifications include: "I am the son of a<br /><br />European-descended Jewish woman and an African-descended<br /><br />Black man," he explains, and am married to a "powerful and dynamic<br /><br />woman from Panama."<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Cynthia McKinney of the Green Party.</strong><br /><br />Her site has not been updated since last December. "Money is<br /><br />the Mother's Milk of Politics," begins her website, which is<br /><br />equally riveting throughout.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Kent Mesplay of the Green Party.</strong><br /><br />"Urgent," warns Mesplay, "Homeland Security is preparing<br /><br />to seize Apache lands!"<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Ralph Nader of the Green Party.</strong><br /><br />I think everyone's heard quite enough from him for now.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Kat Swift of the Green Party. </strong><br /><br />Her web page looks vaguely like a porn site and also<br /><br />has a dynamic calculation of "the cost of the war in Iraq"<br /><br />that changes upward every few seconds.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Michael P. Jingozian of the Libertarian Party.</strong><br /><br />"Attacks against Jingo have backfired," he insists, adding:<br /><br />"We have many things going for us. First, people are mad."<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Steve Kubby of the Libertarian Party.</strong><br /><br />"You can smell it in the air -- voters aren't happy,"<br /><br />says his website.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Alden Link of the Libertarian Party.</strong><br /><br />"New York City could convert the current U.N. building to<br /><br />a hotel and gambling casino," says Link on his site.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- George Phillies of the Libertarian Party.</strong><br /><br />"Under a Phillies administration, torturers will be despised,"<br /><br />he says on his website.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Wayne Allyn Root of the Libertarian Party. </strong><br /><br />Root describes himself as "a highly recognized sports oddsmaker<br /><br />and prognosticator who now lives in Vegas."<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Christine Smith of the Libertarian Party.</strong><br /><br />"As President, my priority will be the American people,"<br /><br />she says on her site.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Stewart A. Alexander of the Peace & Freedom Party.</strong><br /><br />Writes about a "gasoline boycott" and "free education."<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- John Crockford of the Peace & Freedom Party. </strong><br /><br />"Abolish vagrancy laws," says Crockford, who runs a<br /><br />website design business.<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Stanley Hetz of the Peace & Freedom Party.</strong><br /><br />"I have obtained ballot access," Hetz writes. Writes one<br /><br />Hetz fan: "Hetz is a very intelligent, well-spoken man."<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>-- Brian P. Moore of the Peace & Freedom Party.</strong><br /><br />A Florida socialist. Qualifications include being "threatened<br /><br />with arrest the other day by police in Brattleboro, Vermont."<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />__________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 10, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Hillary Does. Big Girls Don't. </strong><br /><br /><br />I was re-thinking Hillary's Muskie Moment<br /><br />this morning and started wishing she had<br /><br />said the following when asked whether it was<br /><br />hard for her to get up every morning and ride<br /><br />chartered buses and eat any kind of food she<br /><br />likes. And I wished she had responded with:<br /><br /><br /><br />"Is campaigning hard for me? I'll tell you<br /><br />what's hard: changing bed pans for a dying<br /><br />loved one. That's hard. I'll tell you what's hard:<br /><br />dealing with the aftermath of a nuclear explosion when<br /><br />hospitals are overflowing with patients with gamma<br /><br />burns. I'll tell you what's hard: ordering the bombing<br /><br />of a major city because its leader has just bombed us.<br /><br />I'll tell you what's hard: having a terrorist<br /><br />make death threats to your family members by name.<br /><br />No, compared to all that, compared to what a president<br /><br />has to deal with every day, campaigning is easy,<br /><br />it's a walk in the breeze."<br /><br /><br /><br />As a voter and a citizen and a media person, I really<br /><br />wish Hillary had answered the question that way. Because<br /><br />I want to have a president who is tougher than me,<br /><br />someone who is cool and composed and in charge<br /><br />when the bombs and bullets are flying nearby. I don't<br /><br />want a leader who is in the corner crying or praying or<br /><br />hiding when a dirty bomb has just been set off in a town<br /><br />where he or she has relatives. I want someone taking<br /><br />charge and being smart and making terrific decisions.<br /><br /><br /><br />Can you imagine what would have happened if JFK had<br /><br />addressed the nation about the Cuban Missile Crisis<br /><br />and started tearing up? What message would that<br /><br />have sent to a belligerent, macho guy like Khrushchev?<br /><br />This isn't like Johnny Carson or Tiger Woods crying;<br /><br />they weren't in charge of the nuclear arsenal, for<br /><br />crissakes!<br /><br /><br />I talked with the late Frank Zappa on the phone in<br /><br />1988, and he weighed in about the presidential contest<br /><br />of that year with words that have stuck with me<br /><br />ever since:<br /><br /><br />"You don't want a Perfect Little Man in the White House,"<br /><br />Zappa told me. "You want a motherfucker in there!"<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 9, 2008<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.affordablehousinginstitute.org/blogs/us/Dewey_defeats_truman_small.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.affordablehousinginstitute.org/blogs/us/Dewey_defeats_truman_small.jpg" /></a><em>Hillary, last night in Manchester</em><br /><br /><br />First, this wasn't the Michigan or South Carolina<br /><br />primary, where there's a huge African-American vote<br /><br />that would be expected to turn out for Obama. This<br /><br />was New Hampshire, virtually all-white New Hampshire,<br /><br />and a black candidate just came within a heartbeat<br /><br />of a-winnin' against a very well-organized, mainstream<br /><br />contenda. That's one of the main headlines from<br /><br />last night.<br /><br /><br /><br />Second: what up with them thar polls?<br /><br /><br /><br />Third: On Sunday morning, after the debates<br /><br />and before I was misled by the polls, I wrote<br /><br />in this space:<br /><strong><br /><br />"If Obama wins, it will be by a slim<br /><br />margin, and there's a chance Hillary<br /><br />could pull it off by a whisker."</strong><br /><br /><em><br />(The complete column is below, under the heading<br /><br />"January 6.")</em><br /><br /><br />So from now on, I'm listening to my own instincts<br /><br />and not to the pollsters!<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />P.S. -- If a news organization is going to<br /><br />appropriate unique coinages and insights of<br /><br />mine, would it please take the time to<br /><br />cite the source (e.g., "as freelance<br /><br />writer Paul Iorio wrote in his online column")?<br /><br /><br />___________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 7, 2008<br /><br /><br /><strong><br />Hillary's Muskie Moment Foretold by The Daily Digression!</strong><br /><em>(by the way, I coined the phrase "Muskie Moment" before other reporters started using it)</em><br /><br />There's something about New Hampshire in the winter<br /><br />that tends to bring out the tears even in candidates<br /><br />for the toughest political office in the land. I grew<br /><br />up in early childhood north of New Hampshire, in Maine,<br /><br />a latitude that produces more singer-songwriters per<br /><br />capita than any other place on Earth, perhaps because<br /><br />the vast expanses of snow and the eternal<br /><br />winters (relieved only by the whiff of rhubarb in the<br /><br />summer) breed melancholy, introspection.<br /><br /><br /><br />So I felt bad seeing Hillary tearing up in Portsmouth<br /><br />today, just as Ed Muskie did all those years ago, but I<br /><br />could also understand part of the reason why: those<br /><br />New England winters. Notice that candidates, win or<br /><br />lose, don't cry while campaigning in fun, warm places<br /><br />like Santa Barbara or Key West.<br /><br /><br /><br />Also, I must note that the Daily Digression sensed this<br /><br />might happen; back on October 14, 2007, I opened my column<br /><br />with the following words (highlighted in bold):<br /><br /><strong><br />Hillary's lead in the polls may be widening<br /><br />but it's not deepening. Hard-core Democrats I've<br /><br />spoken with, men and women, have approximately<br /><br />zero enthusiasm for her candidacy. And she irritates<br /><br />even feminist friends of mine. Bad sign.<br /><br /><br /><br />That also means she's too susceptible to having<br /><br />a Muskie Moment in the snow that destroys her<br /><br />candidacy. She almost had a Muskie Moment in Iowa<br /><br />last Sunday, when that "double agent" asked her a<br /><br />question that was off script. There's bound to be<br /><br />one in the coming months, once things get tougher<br /><br />and when there really are plants<br /><br />and hecklers in the crowd.<br /></strong><br /><br /><br />The entire column is archived below, under the heading "October<br /><br />14, 2007."<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>Could an Obama/Edwards Ticket Beat McCain/Lieberman?</strong><br /><br /><br />Now that it's obvious that Barack Obama is going to<br /><br />win -- and win big -- tomorrow in New Hampshire,<br /><br />another trend is emerging in subsequent primary<br /><br />states: states where Clinton once had a double-digit<br /><br />lead in polls in early December are now trending<br /><br />unmistakably toward Obama.<br /><br /><br /><br />Though post-Iowa state-by-state poll results are<br /><br />scarce, the trajectory is the same almost<br /><br />everywhere, with all signs pointing to Obama<br /><br />winning the top five SuperTuesday states on<br /><br />Feb. 5 (e.g., his home state of Illinois, California,<br /><br />Georgia, New Jersey and even New York, where<br /><br />Clinton serves as Senator).<br /><br /><br /><br />And it's highly doubtful the next three biggest<br /><br />SuperTuesday states -- Missouri, Arizona and<br /><br />Tennessee -- would somehow be immune from the nationwide<br /><br />trend toward Obama.<br /><br /><br /><br />The speculation, at least on the Democratic side,<br /><br />should now turn to who Obama will choose as his running<br /><br />mate, a decision that, of course, would partly depend<br /><br />on who the Republican nominee is going to be, and<br /><br />that's uncertain at this point, though if I had to<br /><br />guess, I'd call it for McCain. And, if I had to guess<br /><br />again -- and, admittedly, it's way too early for this<br /><br />sort of thing -- I'd say the Arizona senator has been<br /><br />acting pretty chummy lately with his lonely comrade<br /><br />in Iraq war boosterism, Joseph Lieberman, who would<br /><br />provide That Special Blue State Wedge for a red<br /><br />state candidate like Mac.<br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, Obama and his people must be<br /><br />huddling around now, or will be huddling soon,<br /><br />to draw up the proverbial Short List. And such a<br /><br />list is surprisingly short when it comes to<br /><br />potential veeps who have already been vetted by<br /><br />voters and by the media and have had some<br /><br />experience hiking the national campaign trail.<br /><br /><br /><br />First, obviously, Obama would want to turn to<br /><br />the candidates who came in second, third and beyond<br /><br />in the primaries. But Hillary has too much pride<br /><br />for the number two spot, and besides, the Democrats<br /><br />can't afford to lose a Senate seat. Biden/Dodd/Richardson<br /><br />are terrific statesmen but box office poison. Evan<br /><br />Bayh's name always comes up in these things but,<br /><br />face it, he couldn't even get through the<br /><br />starting gate of the '08 race a year or so ago. Ditto<br /><br />Vilsack. Obviously, a charismatic swing<br /><br />state politician from Florida or Ohio might fit<br /><br />the bill, but John Glenn is pushing 90, a bit of a drawback,<br /><br />and Lawton Chiles is currently dead,<br /><br />which would definitely rule him out.<br /><br /><br /><br />Wesley Clark will probably be considered and rejected<br /><br />(his '04 bid was anemic), as will Michael Bloomberg,<br /><br />who will turn it down because he's thinking of his<br /><br />own run. Oh, how the list is short of peeps who<br /><br />wanna be the president's bitch for four years!<br /><br /><br /><br />Of course, that leaves Barack with, pretty much, one<br /><br />possibility. This next contender has already left<br /><br />his job, so there'd be no loss in Congress, and<br /><br />has plenty of time on his hands, which he's currently<br /><br />spending on a (at this point) vanity campaign for<br /><br />president. Further, he's already done the veep<br /><br />thing and has a southern accent, which will play<br /><br />nicely in some purple states. He needs no further<br /><br />introduction, folks, he's That Two Americas guy<br /><br />y'all been hearin' about: former Senator John<br /><br />Edwards of one of those red states Obama would<br /><br />love to pick off and put in the Democratic column<br /><br />next November.<br /><br /><br /><br />Then again, all bets are off if Oprah says, "yes."<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />__________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />EXTRA! for January 6, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Why McCain and Obama Will Win in New Hampshire on Tuesday</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/ap_john_mccain_070425_ms.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/ap_john_mccain_070425_ms.jpg" /></a><em>the likely winners on Tuesday</em><br /><a href="http://www.nationalclergycouncil.org/images/Barack%20Obama%20Official%20small.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: right; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.nationalclergycouncil.org/images/Barack%20Obama%20Official%20small.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />The reasons Barack Obama<br /><br />and John McCain will win<br /><br />the New Hampshire primary<br /><br />on Tuesday are these:<br /><br /><br /><br />First, the Iowa win has given Obama momentum in a race that<br /><br />had been virtually tied in New Hampshire.<br /><br /><br /><br />Second, it was plain to see that Obama won last night's<br /><br />debate and Clinton lost and even seemed unsure of<br /><br />herself (see analysis below), which has probably added to<br /><br />Obama's total by a couple percentage points.<br /><br /><br /><br />Third, at the GOP debate, McCain trounced Romney, who<br /><br />looked weak and was already suffering from negative<br /><br />momentum from his Iowa loss.<br /><br /><br /><br />Incidentally, The Daily Digression has not yet endorsed a<br /><br />candidate for president and may not do so (I try to keep my<br /><br />analysis as objective as possible).<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><em><br />[posted at around 10:30 am [PT] on January 6.]</em><br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 6, 2008<br /><br /><br />I've purposely not read or heard any of the spin or<br /><br />commentary about last night's presidential debates<br /><br />because I want to come to my own analysis fresh.<br /><br /><br /><br />That said, the debate winners last night were -- by many<br /><br />miles -- Barack Obama and John McCain, and the big<br /><br />losers were John Edwards and Mitt Romney.<br /><br />Romney, rapidly losing his favorite son advantage<br /><br />in New Hampshire, came off worst of all, particularly on<br /><br />the health care issue when he implied that things like heart<br /><br />attacks and strokes are business proposals, not<br /><br />diseases, and that one could go into an ER and get<br /><br />a "repair" for a thousand bucks.<br /><br /><br /><br />Suddenly, Romney seemed like Poppy Bush being<br /><br />mystified by a check-out scanner at the supermarket,<br /><br />the blue blood who has been rich too long to understand<br /><br />what a shrieking nightmare the American health care<br /><br />system really is.<br /><br /><br /><br />By contrast, McCain came across like the disciplinarian,<br /><br />spanking Romney on immigration and sending him to bed<br /><br />without his pork rinds. Mitt seemed thin-skinned, defensive,<br /><br />like the son of somebody instead of his own man<br /><br />(a bit like Haven Hamilton's "nice" son in the movie<br /><br />"Nashville"), trying for that Reaganesqe effect but<br /><br />not quite getting it. If McCain had a lead in the<br /><br />polls going into the debate, he clearly increased it<br /><br />with his performance last night. (Still, if nominated,<br /><br />McCain might turn out to be the Dole of '08.)<br /><br /><br /><br />On the Democratic side, Edwards seemed distracted, even<br /><br />losing track of a question at one point, and otherwise<br /><br />appearing flabby in direct contrast to Obama.<br /><br /><br /><br />Obama was the star of the show, dwarfing everyone else<br /><br />onstage, and completely comfortable with being a leader<br /><br />in every instance.<br /><br /><br /><br />Hillary tried a bit too hard to show that she understood the<br /><br />nuances of various issues, inadvertently revealing that she<br /><br />tends to get mired in unnecessary detail. For example, in<br /><br />response to the question of whether we should unilaterally<br /><br />strike bin Laden in Pakistan, she noted the "inherent<br /><br />paranoia" about India in Pakistan and how that might play<br /><br />into a surprise strike. And with regard to withdrawing from<br /><br />Iraq, she brought up the ancillary issue of how we would<br /><br />withdraw the translators (I'm no expert, but I would guess<br /><br />they'd board the same planes that the soldiers are<br /><br />boarding). In sum, she was being too...too.<br /><br /><br /><br />Elsewhere the Dems all scrambled to say that they would<br /><br />deliver the troops back to their hometowns within nine months<br /><br />or a year or your pizza's free.<br /><br /><br /><br />Hillary also repeated her much stated bit about working<br /><br />hard for change. But working hard in the service of a flawed<br /><br />policy is no virtue at all. One could, for example, work 20<br /><br />hour days, 7 days a week, phoning world leaders and chewing<br /><br />them out one by one, and that would certainly be working hard,<br /><br />but it would also be working hard in the service of a<br /><br />seriously misguided goal. The folks who gave us the Iraq<br /><br />war worked around the clock to make the war<br /><br />happen in '03 but we all would've been better off<br /><br />if Rumsfeld and Co. had taken a long vacation in Cabo<br /><br />instead. It's more important to work smart AND hard.<br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile Richardson asks, "Is experience a leper?"<br /><br />The answer to that is, "Sometimes." The wrong kind of<br /><br />experience is a leper. To note an extreme example: in 1944,<br /><br />Hitler was a very experienced world leader -- and a hard<br /><br />worker, by the way -- but he was also clueless about<br /><br />his own evil and wrongheaded policies.<br /><br /><br /><br />Richardson keeps touting his own foreign policy<br /><br />credentials but the bigger question is whether he has<br /><br />foreign policy wisdom.<br /><br /><br />Just ask Richardson two simple questions to find out if<br /><br />he's actually smart about foreign policy:<br /><br /><br />1) Did you support the Afghanistan war BEFORE the Afghanistan<br />war in 2001?<br /><br /><br />2) Did you oppose the Iraq war BEFORE the Iraq war in 2003?<br /><br /><br />If he answers yes to both questions, then he does have sound<br /><br />foreign policy judgment. If he answers no to even one of the<br /><br />questions, he doesn't.<br /><br /><br /><br />All told, Richardson looked generally befuddled (if he's so<br /><br />smart, how come he's not so smart?).<br /><br /><br /><br />Also, another winner tonight was ABCs Charles Gibson,<br /><br />whose performance as moderator was, in a word, perfect.<br /><br />Gibson made sure that this was truly a debate and not<br /><br />just a series of joint appearances, and he ended up creating<br /><br />the most revealing candidate forum in many, many years,<br /><br />a striking piece of television journalism.<br /><br /><br /><br />In the wake of the debates and the Iowa results, my<br /><br />best guess is that the winners on Tuesday in New Hampshire<br /><br />will be McCain and Obama (though if Obama wins, it will be<br /><br />by a slim margin, and there's a chance Hillary could<br /><br />pull it off by a whisker).<br /><br /><br /><br />For the first time, I can envision a debate stage, circa<br /><br />Halloween, featuring Obama and McCain. It may not happen,<br /><br />but after last night I can actually see how it might.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[posted around 6:15am [PT] on January 6]</em><br /><br />_____________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 5, 2008<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://weblogs.variety.com/thompsononhollywood/images/2007/09/28/therewillbeblood2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://weblogs.variety.com/thompsononhollywood/images/2007/09/28/therewillbeblood2.jpg" /></a><em>the best picture Oscar front-runner?</em><br /><br /><br />After seeing Paul Thomas Anderson's "There<br /><br />Will Be Blood," I couldn't help but think<br /><br />the film may turn out to be <em>the</em> major<br /><br />picture of '07 -- and a front-runner for the best<br /><br />picture Oscar, too (though, admittedly, I've not<br /><br />yet seen some of the other major contenders).<br /><br /><br /><br />It's the sort of epic, like "Citizen Kane" or the<br /><br />flashback parts of "The Godfather, Part 2,"<br /><br />that captures the thrill of a hard-scrabble<br /><br />entrepreneur overcoming impossible obstacles to become<br /><br />both a wealthy tycoon <em>and</em> the apple that doesn't<br /><br />fall far from the tree.<br /><br /><br /><br />Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis) is a grand American<br /><br />cinematic character, halfway between Noah Cross<br /><br />and Howard Hughes, who starts his career as a miner<br /><br />and ends up an oilman, building a fortune on a foundation<br /><br />of blood and petroleum, both spilled liberally<br /><br />throughout the film.<br /><br /><br /><br />The imagery is novel and riveting. The<br /><br />scene in which oil literally rains everywhere from an<br /><br />unexpected geyser may well take its place in future<br /><br />years in the pantheon of unforgettable, iconic cinematic<br /><br />images. And I think it's safe to say<br /><br />there has never been a murder on the big (or small)<br /><br />screen quite like the one that ends this film.<br /><br /><br /><br />To those who recoil at some of the violence in the movie,<br /><br />I say that Plainview is not nearly as ruthless and brutal<br /><br />as many of America's pioneering entrepreneurs, Plainview's<br /><br />predecessors, who stole land outright (they didn't just<br /><br />offer an unfair buy-out, as Plainview did) and killed those<br /><br />who stood in their way. (America's founding capitalists<br /><br />were also immoral enough to use free labor, which cut<br /><br />their overhead considerably.)<br /><br /><br /><br />This may be Anderson's best film to date but I bet it's not<br /><br />the greatest he'll ever make, because parts of "There Will<br /><br />Be Blood" hint at a future, even more brilliant film, an<br /><br />Anderson "Godfather," still yet to come.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[photo of "There Will Be Blood" from variety.com]</em><br />______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 4, 2008<br /><br /><br /><br />In the wake of last night's Iowa caucuses, I really<br /><br />don't have much to add to my column of three days ago<br /><br />(see below) that accurately predicted that<br /><br />Obama and Huckabee would be the winners of the Iowa<br /><br />vote. My column, posted on January 1st, also correctly<br /><br />noted the reasons why the victors would be Obama and<br /><br />Huckabee, the reason being the fervor of their supporters<br /><br />(the students and the evangelicals, respectively).<br /><br /><br /><br />So I don't have anything else to add except to say that<br /><br />lots of big budget news organizations got it wrong and<br /><br />the no-budget Daily Digression got it right. Which<br /><br />leads to the question: why don't certain editors give<br /><br /><em>me</em> the next paid assignment that you're about to give<br /><br />to the reporter who got it wrong?<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for January 1, 2008 (happy new year!)<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Why Obama and Huckabee Will Win in Iowa on Thursday</strong><br /><br /><em>It Looks Like The Pews Versus the Dorms (Again!) in '08</em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEyBYowQTYc40l3fwz0hTJ_AzJ8Ss_zCeYGqNozvWv9Fn6xVHh7GbQ7Fzqk3iE1Flh4WVegklAreAD7k-MpZZ89ffZxbr-GmAOeFX9hT6rf-d7ayJuRKQqcbqpZMrAoRK0keLABIiAR3s/s1600-h/obamabest.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5150537600491224386" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEyBYowQTYc40l3fwz0hTJ_AzJ8Ss_zCeYGqNozvWv9Fn6xVHh7GbQ7Fzqk3iE1Flh4WVegklAreAD7k-MpZZ89ffZxbr-GmAOeFX9hT6rf-d7ayJuRKQqcbqpZMrAoRK0keLABIiAR3s/s400/obamabest.jpg" /></a><em>the likely winner in Iowa </em><br /><br /><br />First, John Edwards, you can surrender Friday morning,<br /><br />if you'd like, but you probably won't, you'll probably<br /><br />say something like, this doesn't settle or prove<br /><br />anything, though you know it does, definitively and<br /><br />forever. Thursday's Iowa vote will permanently end<br /><br />Edwards's presidential prospects but I bet he might<br /><br />let it drag on through the snows of New Hampshire in<br /><br />the hope that South Carolina will recognize kin in<br /><br />someone who talks <em>like this.</em> But it's over, John,<br /><br />you bet the table's high limit on Iowa and lost, and (as<br /><br />I wrote in a previous column) you're what Gephardt<br /><br />was in '04: old news. You've served your party well<br /><br />and honorably but, as Al Gore once said, it is now<br /><br />time for you to go.<br /><br /><br /><br />Second, Obama will probably win on Thursday for reasons<br /><br />that are obvious to anyone who has attended one of his rallies:<br /><br />he attracts true believers who support him with an unusual<br /><br />level of intensity and who are likely to turn out to vote,<br /><br />come blizzard or ice storm. Huckabee will win for the same<br /><br />reason.<br /><br /><br /><br />Just as in November 2004, the presidential race<br /><br />is, again, coming down to The Students versus The<br /><br />Evangelicals, The Pews versus The Dorms. As you may recall,<br /><br />in Ohio, with the red vote and blue vote almost even, college<br /><br />students started racking up totals for Kerry in Cuyahoga County<br /><br />while churchgoers were coming out in droves for Bush,<br /><br />both groups seeking to break the tie.<br /><br /><br /><br />In all likelihood, both factions will again be the dominant<br /><br />voting blocs on Thursday in Iowa, where I bet the finishing<br /><br />order is Obama-Clinton-Edwards and Huckabee-Romney-McCain.<br /><br /><br /><br />[<em>For the record, this was posted at 7:30am on<br /><br />January 1, 2008.]</em><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik-QoyNQ60uTSlZ_ScNuOMp7wcVQzgTPDZH9raQFauW1yvwwwgQmn7zfwEQSpGBGzSOwL8rNMGMjxHeqCZio7NbFQxn5g9_7dtA_uM_5uu_6WKI9gtxzvEvgJ5NCcFdGkx5TaSHiKYtSM/s1600-h/edwardsupclose.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5150538863211609426" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEik-QoyNQ60uTSlZ_ScNuOMp7wcVQzgTPDZH9raQFauW1yvwwwgQmn7zfwEQSpGBGzSOwL8rNMGMjxHeqCZio7NbFQxn5g9_7dtA_uM_5uu_6WKI9gtxzvEvgJ5NCcFdGkx5TaSHiKYtSM/s400/edwardsupclose.jpg" /></a>sayonara<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Condolences to Bhutto's son, but in all honesty I think<br /><br />he needs a lot more seasoning before he assumes any<br /><br />throne. And one of his profs should tell him<br /><br />"Democracy is the best revenge" is not a very good<br /><br />or true line, because it's not the best revenge if the<br /><br />other guy wins. Perhaps "Democracy is the best policy"<br /><br />would have been a better bit. Speaking of democracy:<br /><br />who voted for him? Maybe what he meant to say was,<br /><br />"Nepotism is the best revenge."<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />[photos of Obama and Edwards by Paul Iorio.]<br /><br />_______________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 28 - 30, 2007<br /><br /><br /><strong>During the Writers's Strike, SNL Still Airs -- On DVD</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglhribrkeBun3N-7YxKfgDP45NPjpemg58GRrgqaJtQcdmSQ3XWTSb-XueOfFGjBuIRv0f9HV-C-VSFvte19_H8q5nHCyePblF8CHHRAFlMdseuWkoBmWtXZIlNpX8v3jzl9qexaeRcjI/s1600-h/scansnlkaufman.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5149064667226864882" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglhribrkeBun3N-7YxKfgDP45NPjpemg58GRrgqaJtQcdmSQ3XWTSb-XueOfFGjBuIRv0f9HV-C-VSFvte19_H8q5nHCyePblF8CHHRAFlMdseuWkoBmWtXZIlNpX8v3jzl9qexaeRcjI/s400/scansnlkaufman.jpg" /></a><em>E - I - E - I - O</em><br /><br /><br />My main girlfriend in my senior year of high<br /><br />school brought me over to her house one night<br /><br />in the spring of 1975 and after awhile phoned her<br /><br />older sister in New York, who she wanted me to<br /><br />meet. You've got to meet my older sister, she said<br /><br />excitedly, her name is Marilyn and she writes for<br /><br />"Rhoda" and is working on this new television show<br /><br />for the fall (or was trying to become a writer for<br /><br />this new television series).<br /><br /><br /><br />So she dialed her in the kitchen, chatted some<br /><br />sisterly chat and then handed me the phone. I talked<br /><br />with her sister for a couple minutes at most and<br /><br />remember I was sort of daunted speaking to this<br /><br />star writer as she told me she was busy writing for a<br /><br />brand new comedy series for NBC that would premiere in<br /><br />several months (or perhaps she said she was trying to get<br /><br />onboard the new series as a writer). Good luck, I said,<br /><br />and we said goodbye.<br /><br /><br /><br />I really didn't think of what she told me on the phone<br /><br />that much until months later, late at night on October<br /><br />11, 1975, when someone said something like come watch<br /><br />this show, George Carlin's on.<br /><br /><br /><br />It was, of course, the series premiere of "Saturday<br /><br />Night Live," then dubbed "Saturday Night," and I instantly<br /><br />figured out that that was the show my girlfriend's sister<br /><br />had been talking about on the phone (by then she was an<br /><br />ex-girlfriend because I had gone away to college, and so had she).<br /><br /><br /><br />And when the credits rolled, either on that show or<br /><br />on another one in '75, there was her name, in big<br /><br />letters, on the tv screen: Marilyn Suzanne<br /><br />Miller. Wow, I thought.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, that's a long, unnecessary but completely true wind-up<br /><br />to saying that I recently re-watched six episodes -- numbers 13<br /><br />to 18 -- from that golden first season of SNL and had a blast,<br /><br />for the most part, doing so. Thing is, you get used to seeing<br /><br />the first season material packaged with bits from the first five<br /><br />seasons in best-of compilations and forget that there're lots<br /><br />of forgotten sketches that are wildly funny amidst the overly<br /><br />familiar classics.<br /><br /><br /><br />In those six episodes are many of the all-time blockbusters<br /><br />that still stand as SNL's very best material: "The Super<br /><br />Bass-o-matic '76," "Lorne's Offer to the Beatles," "The<br /><br />Ten-Letter Metric Alphabet," and Andy Kaufman's "Old MacDonald"<br /><br />(Aykroyd's brilliant E. Buzz Miller didn't happen till the second<br /><br />season).<br /><br /><br /><br />Loose notes on the episodes:<br /><br /><br />Episode 15, with Jill Clayburgh as host, is a real gem,<br /><br />though episode 16, with Anthony Perkins as host, is a snoozer;<br /><br />Desi Arnaz should've cleaned his teeth (dentures?) before<br /><br />going onscreen; Ron Nessen and Jerry Rubin were not very<br /><br />funny people (though seeing Nessen intro Patti Smith was<br /><br />almost surreal); Chevy Chase had great stuff in Update (he<br /><br />once reported that Charles Manson was no longer a threat to<br /><br />society "unless society happens to cross his path"), though<br /><br />his falls were clearly causing him pain -- and at least<br /><br />one of his falls could have easily broken his neck. And, no<br /><br />doubt about it, the reputed tension between Chase and John<br /><br />Belushi is plain to see onscreen, particularly during one<br /><br />Update sketch in which Belushi hauls off and punches<br /><br />Chase at full velocity (see photo).<br /><br /><br />Also: Laraine Newman has such an expressive face that she<br /><br />might have been a great silent movie star in another era; the<br /><br />Bee and Samurai sketches were almost all formulaic<br /><br />and tedious; Kaufman's "Old MacDonald" is unbelievably riotous;<br /><br />the weekly "Home Movies" segment was truly the YouTube of its<br /><br />day; even in the great fertile age of SNL, for every genius<br /><br />bit like the Bass-o-matic or the offer to the Beatles, there<br /><br />were around 17 duds.<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, the vintage DVDs will have to do until the writers's strike<br /><br />is settled.<br /><br /><br />Here are some pics from the first season:<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAj9OKFP3UWQn0vNmYD_Kkk5kNhAJQwGBvCZo2ShtjhGkpUBZpTD-iZuWZzH8OjOPlk9NOjqkW9GigRR9oJw30VrTySGzws0ZYzv-NumrqPyavzdkYUM_Qmsjj_X4SQuF_1tQNoNJgyhQ/s1600-h/scansnlbassomqtic.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5149067274272013570" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAj9OKFP3UWQn0vNmYD_Kkk5kNhAJQwGBvCZo2ShtjhGkpUBZpTD-iZuWZzH8OjOPlk9NOjqkW9GigRR9oJw30VrTySGzws0ZYzv-NumrqPyavzdkYUM_Qmsjj_X4SQuF_1tQNoNJgyhQ/s400/scansnlbassomqtic.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><em>pure genius (above and below)</em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGKFcfzYMoCJBySYzC1whCdIl92-AkNj_4jbFLcgH9Y_gl0q7OAOCIIsaGSHfvNrHwaDOjylca5Qns3n4RziPQf1nKw73OrGVHJeWBxXNLH26To15ou71XGGSobnRKQNSKdjH1MVpfBOo/s1600-h/scansnllornebeatles.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5149071633663819026" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGKFcfzYMoCJBySYzC1whCdIl92-AkNj_4jbFLcgH9Y_gl0q7OAOCIIsaGSHfvNrHwaDOjylca5Qns3n4RziPQf1nKw73OrGVHJeWBxXNLH26To15ou71XGGSobnRKQNSKdjH1MVpfBOo/s400/scansnllornebeatles.jpg" /></a><br />---<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCpC-ZHHq2_PgrLnIPPbsySX2nn6LjCaeX5y-PrKP4vk8Zj6ySFIPcQXobrqmK7QUC-qKRKhNr41mMSjB0XV19VYimTPBIJoWa_UpVzO1ppOei3rBg8W3KMCOnZfUbnmMbneAZuZGyIQY/s1600-h/scansnlchevy.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5149073145492307234" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCpC-ZHHq2_PgrLnIPPbsySX2nn6LjCaeX5y-PrKP4vk8Zj6ySFIPcQXobrqmK7QUC-qKRKhNr41mMSjB0XV19VYimTPBIJoWa_UpVzO1ppOei3rBg8W3KMCOnZfUbnmMbneAZuZGyIQY/s400/scansnlchevy.jpg" /></a><em>the dawn and Dean of Update</em><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDyoXG72SKq9xIUzrgbJuuKCYfJ4DA5MBSQsc7_va9XMA7biEqXvd47l-yWoUaNBxa38re9U-DAr5LlJguCi41STf2f-CJJIvboygeePoOuGgW_wE0eoqcsNZNKNGeEovj0l7v6j4_zP4/s1600-h/scansnlchevybelushi.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5149074408212692274" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDyoXG72SKq9xIUzrgbJuuKCYfJ4DA5MBSQsc7_va9XMA7biEqXvd47l-yWoUaNBxa38re9U-DAr5LlJguCi41STf2f-CJJIvboygeePoOuGgW_wE0eoqcsNZNKNGeEovj0l7v6j4_zP4/s400/scansnlchevybelushi.jpg" /></a><em>John and Chevy didn't get along</em><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[photos of TV stills by Paul Iorio.]</em><br /><br /><br /><strong><br /><br />P.S. -- So what ever happened to the relationship<br /><br />between me and my girlfriend of 33 years ago (her<br /><br />name is Judy, by the way)? Here's the<br /><br />scoop (which even she doesn't fully know): I went to a party<br /><br />in '75 (that she was not at) and snacked on some chips and<br /><br />brownies and around an hour later started feeling a bit queasy.<br /><br />And then I started feeling alot worse than queasy, as my heart<br /><br />started racing and I felt sort of stoned though I hadn't<br /><br />even had so much as a drink. I went home and slept it off<br /><br />and when I woke up I felt fine but was wondering what had<br /><br />caused the previous night's problem. And I remember that<br /><br />I then wrote a letter to Judy, now away at college, and told<br /><br />her that "something had happened" and that I'd had this<br /><br />mysterious experience and didn't know what it was (hey, I<br /><br />was 17, for crissakes!).<br /><br /><br /><br />Shortly after I sent her the letter, the mystery was solved.<br /><br />Later that day, the hosts of the party -- friends of mine<br /><br />still -- confessed that they had (unbeknownst to me) put a<br /><br />very large quantity of pot in the brownies that I'd eaten<br /><br />the night before and that that had been the cause of my racing<br /><br />heartbeat, etc. Not a funny practical joke, I must admit,<br /><br />at least from my point of view. In any event, the letter to<br /><br />my former girlfriend had already been mailed, obviously<br /><br />before I could explain to her what had actually happened and<br /><br />that there was no cause for concern, but I think the letter was<br /><br />a turn-off to her and the damage had already been done. In any<br /><br />event, we'd already drifted apart, and things were already<br /><br />over anyway, so that was the last letter I wrote to her. </strong><br /><br /><br /><br />[this day's column updated January 2, 2008]<br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 28, 2007<br /><br /><br />Benazir Bhutto was the absolute opposite of so many<br /><br />cowardly politicians and public officials worldwide<br /><br />who play it safe, don't cause controversy and are the<br /><br />last to take a daring stand on any issue. She openly defied<br /><br />death threats, enraged the backward people of the northwest<br /><br />territories and generally showed more courage than Osama bin Laden<br /><br />has ever shown, as he hides in his doghouse and releases<br /><br />cowardly videos from a big distance. Can you imagine<br /><br />bin Laden having the balls Bhutto had and appearing at<br /><br />rallies amongst his fans in Waziristan? (By the way, the<br /><br />next time a bin Laden vid turns up at al Jazeera, would it<br /><br />kill those tv reporters to break a sweat and try to track<br /><br />down its chain of custody? Who gave it to the guy who<br /><br />gave it to the guy? Was there any video surveillance<br /><br />capturing its delivery to Jazeera? But I digress.)<br /><br /><br /><br />All condolences about Bhutto's death must go to us all,<br /><br />because her murder is a global loss and may well cause<br /><br />enough turmoil to topple Musharraf, which would be a revoltin'<br /><br />development, to say the least, because the country could<br /><br />then topple into the hands of the Taliban.<br /><br /><br /><br />If Pakistan and its nukes were to fall into the hands of the<br /><br />Taliban or al Qaeda, the U.S. would, of course, have no choice<br /><br />but to act immediately -- militarily and unilaterally, if<br /><br />necessary -- to take out the new regime before it becomes<br /><br />entrenched. There can be no violation of one inviolable rule:<br /><br />the Taliban/al Qaeda cannot have access to nuclear weapons<br /><br />under any circumstances.<br /><br /><br /><br />On July 9, 2007, in the Daily Digression (see below), I<br /><br />wrote: "Our anxiety should be centered on Pakistan, not<br /><br />on Iraq. Iraq is soo '03. Pakistan may soon become soo '08."<br /><br /><br /><br />And that now appears to be the case, or almost the case. Iraq<br /><br />is becoming far less of a factor in '08 politics than it was<br /><br />even six months ago, and there is the nauseating possibility<br /><br />that Musharraf could be deposed in coming months (right in the<br /><br />middle of primary season, no less).<br /><br /><br /><br />By SuperDuper Tuesday, the dominant issue in the U.S.<br /><br />presidential campaign may be our involvement in the war<br /><br />in Pakistan.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />P.S. -- By the way, some have implied that my new song<br /><br />"I Killed Osama bin Laden" incites violence against the<br /><br />al Qaeda leader. To which I respond: and your point is what?<br /><br />Look, I'm not going to sit here and explain my song (my music<br /><br />website is at pauliorio.blogspot.com) but I will say that I<br /><br />think it would be great if Osama bin Laden were murdered.<br /><br /><br />__________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 26, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br />I've still not seen several of the major feature films<br /><br />of 2007 (I'm certain I'm going to be knocked out by<br /><br />the new Paul Thomas Anderson), so I'm not going to<br /><br />write a ten-best of '07 list yet -- though I will say<br /><br />that the two most haunting films I've seen this year<br /><br />were released in '04 and '05.<br /><br /><br /><br />The first is 2004's "Before Sunset," Richard Linklater's<br /><br />sequel to his 1995 film "Before Sunrise," and what a<br /><br />pleasant surprise to see the new one outshines the<br /><br />original -- in fact, it may be the best two-person<br /><br />ensemble picture since "My Dinner With Andre." Julie Delpy<br /><br />can create the sense of falling in love like few other<br /><br />actresses of her generation, and the last sequence of<br /><br />the film, in which she opens up gradually like a flower<br /><br />to sunlight, is very true and poignant and moving and<br /><br />lovely and I'm running out of words to express exactly<br /><br />how much I adore it. And that last line ("I know") is<br /><br />perfect.<br /><br /><br /><br />The other film is 2005's "Nine Lives," directed by<br /><br />Rodrigo Garcia, who also directed that memorable<br /><br />episode of "The Sopranos" in which Carmela<br /><br />has dinner and talks "Madame Bovary" with A.J.'s<br /><br />schoolteacher. "Nine Lives" is pure ultra-realism,<br /><br />nine separate, sometimes harrowing stories that climax<br /><br />with the last, in which Glenn Close's character visits<br /><br />a cemetery for a reason that becomes heartbreakingly<br /><br />evident only if you're watching the last couple minutes<br /><br />very closely and happen to notice the size of the grave<br /><br />she's visiting. I'm surprised that some<br /><br />otherwise perceptive crits didn't get or like it.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />In terms of the best music released in 2007, I nominate<br /><br />the following:<br /><br /><br />-- my bootleg tape of Jeff Tweedy live in Golden Gate Park<br /><br />in San Francisco in October, an inspired performance of<br /><br />nearly two dozen songs (amazing how strong the "Mermaid"<br /><br />material is, not to mention "The Thanks I Get," "Passenger<br /><br />Side," "I'm the Man Who Loves You," etc.). And I<br /><br />sometimes wonder whether "California Stars" might<br /><br />eventually become the unofficial (or maybe even the<br /><br />official) state song of California.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- my bootleg tape of Oakley Hall performing in<br /><br />Berkeley, Calif., in May. I still don't know the<br /><br />names of all the songs, but I enjoy them a lot and<br /><br />listen to them more than I probably should.<br /><br />I now see the band as a sort of indie Fleetwood Mac<br /><br />and wouldn't be shocked if they came up with an<br /><br />alt-country equivalent to "Rumors" in the future.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- Bright Eyes's "Cassadaga," particularly the song<br /><br />"Four Winds."<br /><br /><br />-- Arcade Fire's "Neon Bible," particularly "Intervention."<br /><br /><br />-- Paul McCartney's "Memory Almost Full," particularly "That Was Me"<br />(it's his best solo album in many years).<br /><br /><br />-- Feist's "The Reminder," particularly the irresistible "1234."<br /><br /><br />-- Bruce Springsteen's "Magic," particularly "Girls in<br /><br />Their Summer Clothes," perhaps his best song since<br /><br />"Brilliant Disguise" and one that I'd love to hear Brian Wilson<br /><br />perform with the band that backed him on his "Smile" tour.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- my bootleg tape of Paul Simon's '06 concert in<br /><br />Berkeley, where he brought his more recent material to<br /><br />vivid life and put a new light on some of his classics.<br /><br /><br /><br />-- my bootleg tape of live versions of songs from<br /><br />Radiohead's "In Rainbows," particularly "4 Minute<br /><br />Warning" and "Down is the New Up."<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Now that Sacha Baron Cohen has decided to forever abandon<br /><br />his hilarious Borat and Ali G characters, maybe he might<br /><br />consider developing a new persona that lampoons India-centric<br /><br />hippies -- one of the last, uh, sacred cows not yet<br /><br />touched by major satirists. A Mumbai Borat, if you will.<br /><br /><br /><br />I thought of that after reading William Grimes's<br /><br />marvelously witty review in today's New York Times<br /><br />of Kirin Narayan's memoir "My Family<br /><br />and Other Saints" (University of Chicago Press).<br /><br />Haven't read the book yet, but the review is one of<br /><br />Grimes's best. Here's an excerpt:<br /><br /><br />"Families can be so embarrassing. Imagine the agonies of<br />an adolescent girl whose house has become infested with<br />India-besotted hippies from all over the globe, whose<br />sarcastic father stumbles around in an alcoholic<br />haze and whose mother kneels at the feet of every<br />swami she meets. And let us not forget grandma, who<br />holds long conversations with her cow and once met<br />a 1,000-year-old cobra with a ruby in its forehead<br />and a mustache on its albino face...<br /><br /><br />....The god-saturated culture of India, which Paw<br />ridicules, seeps into Ms. Narayan’s pores. At the<br />same time she tries to interpret American culture in<br />Indian terms, a constant source of confusion. “Was<br />‘It’s All Over Now, Baby Blue’ a warning to the blue<br />baby Krishna that his wicked uncle King Kamsa<br />was sending demons to kill him?” she wonders. And why<br />was Bob Dylan saying, in another perplexing song, that<br />everyone would get pelted with rocks?"<br /><br /><br /><em>Check it out in today's Times!</em><br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><strong><br />Uh oh! Could my humble Daily Digression column be<br /><br />spawning imitators, or at least an imitator?!! Maybe.<br /><br />An old high school pal of mine, who I hadn't seen for<br /><br />decades (until a couple years ago), emailed me recently<br /><br />and said he was naming his own blog "But I Digress."<br /><br />That, of course, has been my sign-off for my column<br /><br />since Feburary '07, as I told him in an email the other<br /><br />week, though that apparently has not deterred him from<br /><br />naming his own column, which has yet to launch, after mine.<br /><br />Just so readers of the Daily Digression know: my blog has<br /><br />absolutely positively nothing to do with his blog (the pal's<br /><br />name is Bill Epps) and vice versa. </strong><br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[this day's column updated, 1/02/08]<br /></em><br />______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 22, 2007<br /><br /><br />My column on "The Pat Robertson/Al Sharpton<br /><br />Conservative Religious Axis" (see below)<br /><br />seems to have caused a bit of (welcome) controversy.<br /><br />One reader wants to know what harm it does to<br /><br />believe in god and in the other supernatural<br /><br />phenomena in the Bible. My answer: the harm it<br /><br />does is substantial; religion leaves you<br /><br />stuck in false hope and delusion, and when<br /><br />the delusion wears off, and you come to, you'll<br /><br />end up in more despair than if you had accepted<br /><br />reality all along.<br /><br /><br /><br />Further (and more important), religion has a negative<br /><br />insidious effect on other aspects of a person's<br /><br />life in that it lowers the bar and the standard of<br /><br />proof that one sets in order to believe other things;<br /><br />that's probably part of the reason why many in Pat<br /><br />Robertson's camp believed Iraq had WMDs, despite a<br /><br />complete lack of evidence -- and why many in Al Sharpton's<br /><br />camp believed the lies of, say, Crystal Mangum, despite<br /><br />copious evidence to the contrary.<br /><br /><br /><br />When you're raised to believe something because "the Bible<br /><br />told me so," you're also more likely later in life to<br /><br />believe stuff like "Iraq has WMDs because Rumsfeld told me so"<br /><br />and "the Duke Three did it because Crystal Mangum told me so."<br /><br />Belief in the supernatural cripples your powers of reasoning.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_____________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 18, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>The Robertson/Sharpton Religious Conservative Axis</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://media.collegepublisher.com/media/paper932/stills/406368ac288ea-67-1.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://media.collegepublisher.com/media/paper932/stills/406368ac288ea-67-1.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/gallery/2003/01/14/sharptonX.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: right; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://image.guardian.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/gallery/2003/01/14/sharptonX.jpg" /></a><br />Pat Robertson ("right") and Al Sharpton (right)<br /><br /><br />I recently re-watched some episodes of "All in<br /><br />the Family" from its brilliant, edgy, thrillingly<br /><br />audacious first season, and started wondering whether<br /><br />the series, if it were premiering today, would ever<br /><br />survive attacks from religious conservatives like<br /><br />Pat Robertson and Al Sharpton.<br /><br /><br /><br />Here's what might happen today. First, there would be<br /><br />a boycott of its advertisers by Robertson. Second,<br /><br />Sharpton would bring his bullhorn and protesters<br /><br />to the Black Rock building in Manhattan. Then,<br /><br />predictably, timid TV execs, with mortgages and private<br /><br />school tuition to pay, would issue some insincere apology<br /><br />and cancel the show in order to keep those paychecks<br /><br />a-comin'.<br /><br /><br /><br />I also recently re-listened to parts of Richard Pryor's<br /><br />landmark comedy album "That Nigger's Crazy" and thought<br /><br />the same thing: if it were released today, how long would<br /><br />it be before the Robertson/Sharpton crowd forced the<br /><br />record company to either withdraw the album or to at least<br /><br />re-title it and delete some of its bits?<br /><br /><br /><br />And then it dawned on me that America is now less<br /><br />culturally progressive than it was in the early 1970s.<br /><br /><br /><br />Back then, Americans seemed to understand irony a lot<br /><br />better and appreciated artistic freedom a lot more.<br /><br />Today, I don't think some people in the Robertson/Sharpton<br /><br />camp understand the nature of irony, were never schooled<br /><br />in classic satire, have never understood parody. When<br /><br />they should've been reading Jonathan Swift or Voltaire<br /><br />or Woody Allen in school, these cultural conservatives were<br /><br />instead reading stories from the Bible of highly variable<br /><br />quality (I mean, the story of Abraham and Isaac is not only<br /><br />crappy, but more than a little creepy). They've not been<br /><br />properly educated in how one can use, say, ethnic slurs<br /><br />in the service of condemning ethnic slurs. And so now we're<br /><br />all supposed to lower our standards to the level<br /><br />of people like Robertson and Sharpton who simply don't<br /><br />get it.<br /><br /><br /><br />The Robertson/Sharpton people should 1) not take the Bible so<br /><br />literally and 2) develop a sense of humor.<br /><br /><br /><br />I mean, I watched one episode of "All in the Family" in<br /><br />which Archie used the ethnic slur "dago." Now, I have an<br /><br />Italian-American last name and am very proud of my<br /><br />Italian-American heritage, but I laughed and laughed when I<br /><br />heard him say the word "dago" because I understood the context<br /><br />in which it was said: an actor, Carroll O'Connor, was<br /><br />portraying an ignorant, bigoted guy in a way that showed us how<br /><br />hilariously ridiculous his ignorance and bigotry was. But if<br /><br />you're schooled in literalism, which is to say unschooled, you<br /><br />won't get it, and you'll probably end up insisting that<br /><br />better-educated people lower themselves to your level of<br /><br />miseducation.<br /><br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>The Veepstakes</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://msnbcmedia2.msn.com/i/msnbc/Sections/Newsweek/Components/Photos/060919_060925/060922_BarackObama_Xtrawide.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: left; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://msnbcmedia2.msn.com/i/msnbc/Sections/Newsweek/Components/Photos/060919_060925/060922_BarackObama_Xtrawide.jpg" /></a><br /><a href="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/nm_bloomberg_070516_ms.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 0px 10px 10px; WIDTH: 200px; FLOAT: right; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/nm_bloomberg_070516_ms.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><em>Could an Obama/Bloomberg ticket be in the works?</em><br /><br /><br /><br />For months, everybody has been talking about how<br /><br />the presidential race of '08 might be a repeat of<br /><br />the Giuliani versus Clinton U.S. Senate race that almost<br /><br />happened in 2000.<br /><br /><br /><br />But what was the ultimate fate of that match-up? And does<br /><br />it tell us anything about what might happen in the 2008 race?<br /><br />To recap: Giuliani quit the Senate contest (due to health<br /><br />problems) and Clinton won against a weak second.<br /><br /><br /><br />So is Giuliani fated to repeat that same pattern of<br /><br />entering a high-stakes race, becoming a near front-runner<br /><br />and then dropping out (for whatever reason)?<br /><br /><br /><br />One could argue that that pattern already has repeated<br /><br />itself, because Giuliani has effectively dropped out of the<br /><br />race, or at least out of the early contests in Iowa, New<br /><br />Hampshire and South Carolina, which may turn out to be<br /><br />tantamount to dropping out of the race altogether (though<br /><br />that is yet to be determined).<br /><br /><br /><br />The other part of that equation is that, absent Giuliani,<br /><br />Hillary wins against a nominal Republican opponent (that,<br /><br />too, is yet to be determined).<br /><br /><br /><br />By the way, now that Obama is a truly viable contender, it<br /><br />may be time to speculate about who he'd choose for<br /><br />his running-mate. My guess: Michael Bloomberg.<br /><br /><br /><br />How an Obama/Bloomberg ticket would fare, of course, depends<br /><br />on who the GOP nominates. Possibilities include:<br /><br />Huckabee/Giuliani, Giuliani/Huckabee, Giuliani/McCain,<br /><br />Huckabee/McCain -- though a McCain/Lieberman ticket<br /><br />ain't in the cards in '08 (yes, McCain is presidential,<br /><br />but actually he's more like a retired ex-president than<br /><br />a future one). Least likely match-ups: Kucinich/Tancredo,<br /><br />Gravel/Huckabee, Obama/Winfrey, Hillary/Gore, Giuliani/Ron Paul<br /><br />and McCain/Kucinich.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><br />Incidentally, it's a bit of a thrill that Led Zeppelin chose to<br /><br />start its reunion show at O2 with newsreel footage that mentioned<br /><br />the one Zep show I actually happened to attend as teenager<br /><br />(see previous Digression).<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><em><br />[photo of Robertson from unknown photographer; pic of Sharpton from Guardian.co.uk; photo of Obama from msnbc.com; pic of Bloomberg from abcnews.com.]</em><br />_______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 10, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtws6CeMpALrMao8VXxcs6vlew6mVjBwoE5R3UchpSWwZBzKUTpj4N9HBIHeNA6rYoQvXNTrOSZfCE3Ak94Lq5OBahrHM9GQDUloMDM1p_DLfWbXKYJT88m6MsHFqBFHdbi7JColyfUIA/s1600-h/scanledzepzoso.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5142439510671955426" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtws6CeMpALrMao8VXxcs6vlew6mVjBwoE5R3UchpSWwZBzKUTpj4N9HBIHeNA6rYoQvXNTrOSZfCE3Ak94Lq5OBahrHM9GQDUloMDM1p_DLfWbXKYJT88m6MsHFqBFHdbi7JColyfUIA/s400/scanledzepzoso.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br />Led Zeppelin reunites tonight in the U.K. for a one-off<br /><br />gig, featuring the three surviving members plus Jason Bonham,<br /><br />son of the late John Bonham, on drums.<br /><br /><br /><br />I was lucky enough to have seen Zeppelin live in its prime,<br /><br />when I was 15 years old, and to have caught a Zep concert that<br /><br />actually made pop culture history.<br /><br /><br /><br />The show was Zeppelin's 1973 record-breaking concert at<br /><br />Tampa Stadium in Tampa, Florida, and its main<br /><br />claim to fame is that it attracted more<br /><br />paying fans than had ever attended a show by a single act in<br /><br />the U.S., surpassing the previous record set by the Beatles at<br /><br />Shea Stadium in 1965. (Zeppelin drew 56,800 fans, the Beatles<br /><br />55,000. For the record, there were other bands on the bill at Shea,<br /><br />though it was effectively a solo show.)<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9F7UjxLDSLgTbM309P_TykSF9pzoc6woxYgsecPpN05sQyBmTmtk9o1T4ZkSnPKYJ6nKr-pyOmP7XrePO2ND6Ml2Ffa5dXhQQixG1AV31MJMG8oqXaaLX1deR9TwPUHzqiOl3XHSIukk/s1600-h/scanledzeppelin.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5142454577417229810" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9F7UjxLDSLgTbM309P_TykSF9pzoc6woxYgsecPpN05sQyBmTmtk9o1T4ZkSnPKYJ6nKr-pyOmP7XrePO2ND6Ml2Ffa5dXhQQixG1AV31MJMG8oqXaaLX1deR9TwPUHzqiOl3XHSIukk/s400/scanledzeppelin.jpg" /></a><br /><br />In rock culture lore, Tampa Stadium is where Led Zeppelin<br /><br />officially dethroned the Beatles in the concert world,<br /><br />and it happened on May 5, 1973.<br /><br /><br /><br />To this day, on and off the web, some rock fans in the<br /><br />region still talk glowingly about the concert as if it<br /><br />were the Woodstock festival or the Monterey Pop fest.<br /><br /><br /><br />Was Tampa Stadium a great Zeppelin performance? Some<br /><br />of it was. Guitarist Jimmy Page was in rare form and the rest of<br /><br />the band sounded excited about having broken the Beatles's<br /><br />record. But Robert Plant was hoarse, a fairly substantial<br /><br />drawback.<br /><br /><br /><br />I attended as a 15-year-old high school student,<br /><br />arriving at the Stadium with a friend well before the<br /><br />Saturday night concert began. After presenting our five-dollar<br /><br />advance tickets (six on the day of the show), we took a<br /><br />place on the field, around a third of the way to the stage.<br /><br /><br /><br />The springtime atmosphere was mostly festive as the speakers<br /><br />blasted such music as the Allman Brothers Band's "Revival"<br /><br />(with its lyrics, "People can you feel it/love is everywhere").<br /><br /><br /><br />But the crowd was occasionally rowdy, too, throwing bottles at<br /><br />police officers at one point.<br /><br /><br /><br />Zeppelin took the stage after 8pm, with the introduction:<br /><br />"Ladies and gentlemen, what more can I say? Led Zeppelin!"<br /><br /><br />Fans screamed as if they were on fire.<br /><br /><br />Plant stepped to the mike. "Looks like we've done something<br /><br />nobody's done before," he said, referring to the box office record.<br /><br />"And that's fantastic," he added, according to my bootleg<br /><br />tape of the show.<br /><br /><br /><br />Page struck a practice chord. John Bonham played a drum<br /><br />roll. Feedback filled the air. Then Bonham pounded<br /><br />out the intro to "Rock and Roll."<br /><br /><br />As Plant started singing, it became obvious he was straining to<br /><br />hit the high notes (due to some sort of cold), which was disappointing.<br /><br /><br /><br />But Page more than made up for it, fluidly riffing through<br /><br />a stunning twenty-minute opener that included "Celebration Day,"<br /><br />"Black Dog," "Over the Hills and Far Away" and "Misty Mountain Hop"<br /><br />in quick succession.<br /><br /><br />Just before "Misty Mountain," Plant chatted to the crowd<br /><br />again.<br /><br /><br />"Anyone make the Orlando gig we did last time?," he asked.<br /><br />Fans cheered.<br /><br /><br />"This is the second gig we've done since we've been back to<br /><br />the States and uh..." Plant seemed speechless for a moment.<br /><br />"And I can't believe it!"<br /><br /><br />But the lovey-dovey mood evaporated a bit after "Since<br /><br />I've Been Loving You," when front row fans began getting out of<br /><br />control, pushing against barriers and forcing Plant to play<br /><br />security guard.<br /><br /><br />"Listen, listen," Plant said to the unruly crowd, according<br /><br />to my tape. "May I ask you, as we've achieved something<br /><br />between us that's never been done before, if we could just<br /><br />cool it on these barriers here because otherwise there're<br /><br />gonna be a lot of people who might get [hurt],"<br /><br />Plant told the crowd. "So if you have respect for the person<br /><br />who's standing next to you, which is really what it's all<br /><br />about, then possibly we can act more gently."<br /><br /><br />"We don't want problems, do we?," Plant asked. The crowd<br /><br />cheered.<br /><br /><br />Several songs later, after "The Rain Song," it became clear<br /><br />the crowd was now getting seriously out of control. Plant got<br /><br />testy.<br /><br /><br />"We want this to be a really joyous occasion," he says. "And<br /><br />I'm going to tell you this, because three people have been<br /><br />taken to the hospital, and if you keep pushing on that barrier,<br /><br />there're going to be stacks and stacks of people going. So for<br /><br />goodness sakes...can we move back just a little bit because it's<br /><br />the only way. If you can't do that, then you can't really live<br /><br />with your brother. Just for this evening anyway."<br /><br /><br /><br />"Can you cooperate?!," asked Plant, a bit exasperated. There<br /><br />was tepid applause. "It's a shame to talk about things like<br /><br />cooperation when there're so many of us. Anyway you people sitting<br /><br />up the sides are doing a great job. [fans cheer] But these poor<br /><br />people are being pushed by somebody. So cool it. That's not very<br /><br />nice."<br /><br /><br /><br />Plant also took the opportunity to publicly diss Miami. For some<br /><br />unknown reason, the band was apparently still sore about a 1970<br /><br />gig in Miami Beach that stands as the last time Zep played in<br /><br />that area.<br /><br /><br /><br />"We played the Convention Center in Miami, which was really<br /><br />bad," said Plant to the crowd, just before<br /><br />introducing "Dazed and Confused." "The gig was good, but<br /><br />there were some men walking around all the time making<br /><br />such a silly scene." He didn't elaborate.<br /><br /><br />The crowd problems seemed to dissipate after a few more songs.<br /><br />By the time the group roared into "Whole Lotta Love," near the<br /><br />end of the almost three-hour set, Plant shouted, "We've got 57,000<br /><br />people here and we're gonna boogie!,” segueing into “Let That<br /><br />Boy Boogie Woogie.” The crowd went nuts, acting like<br /><br />Beatlemaniacs at Shea.<br /><br /><br />Unfortunately, I had to be home by around 11pm,<br /><br />which meant missing encores "The Ocean" and "Communication<br /><br />Breakdown."<br /><br /><br />The highlight of the night, judging from a tape of the show and<br /><br />from memory, was "Over the Hills and Far Away," if only because<br /><br />of Page's incendiary solo, which was quite unlike his solos in<br /><br />other live versions of the song. Also notable were extended<br /><br />instrumental segments during “No Quarter” (courtesy<br /><br />bassist/keyboardist John Paul Jones) and “Dazed and Confused,”<br /><br />a rousing “The Song Remains the Same,” and a predictable but<br /><br />engaging “Stairway to Heaven.”<br /><br /><br /><br />No doubt, some of the same songs will turn up on tonight's<br /><br />reunion gig setlist. Here's hoping the band decides<br /><br />to do a full-scale tour in 2008, 'cause it's been a long time.<br /><br /><br />* * * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>Yet Another Tragedy Caused By Gun Permissiveness</strong><br /><br /><br /><br />Almost no news organization is reporting the Colorado<br /><br />shootings this way: "In the wake of the Omaha<br /><br />shootings...."<br /><br /><br /><br />Yet every news organizaton should be mentioning Omaha<br /><br />in its stories about Colorado. Context is Journalism 101.<br /><br />But lots of tv news correspondents are saying, "Omaha?<br /><br />What's Omaha? Ohhh that!! That was soooo 72 hours ago!"<br /><br /><br /><br />So let's see: Omaha has been completely wiped from memory<br /><br />now that there's this new shooting spree in Colorado.<br /><br />And lemme guess the reason why certain tv newsers aren't<br /><br />mentioning Omaha in stories about Colorado; they're<br /><br />probably saying something like, "The shooter in the last<br /><br />one used an AK-47 and the shooter this time used an AK-46,<br /><br />which, of course, is a vast difference."<br /><br /><br /><br />They fail to see that the common denominator is bullets.<br /><br />Both shooters used bullets. If they hadn't, nobody'd be<br /><br />dead today.<br /><br /><br /><br />Now let's take a look at the real reason Omaha isn't<br /><br />being brought up in stories about Colorado: it's<br /><br />called the NRA. The NRA is so well-organized, so<br /><br />lawyered up, with so many true believers who know<br /><br />how to threaten you without threatening you, that<br /><br />some news orgs take the path of least resistance<br /><br />and leave out references to Omaha in stories about<br /><br />Colorado, just as they left out references to Virginia Tech<br /><br />in stories about Omaha, just as they'll leave out references<br /><br />to Colorado in stories about the next shooting (and, by the way,<br /><br />just as they left out references to Tawana Brawley in stories<br /><br />about Crystal Mangum).<br /><br /><br /><br />At some news organizations, they report the truth without fear<br /><br />or favor -- unless the truth is too unpopular.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Looks like NBC's long-shot gamble on "Friday Night<br /><br />Lights" might actually be paying off. After<br /><br />a season-plus of basement ratings, the critically acclaimed<br /><br />series -- which is arguably almost as brilliant<br /><br />as "The Sopranos" in its way -- was tied last week<br /><br />for the number one spot in its time period among<br /><br />viewers 18-49, the main demo advertisers<br /><br />care about, though it was #3 overall for its time<br /><br />period. Now the question is whether its momentum<br /><br />will be slowed by the writers' strike.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />____________________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 9, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Advice for the Six Major Presidential Candidates</strong><br /><br /><br /><a href="http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2007/04/14/us/14wellesley.large1.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2007/04/14/us/14wellesley.large1.jpg" /></a><em>when she was fab</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>Hillary Clinton</strong><br /><br /><br />Hillary is losing altitude because she appears to<br /><br />be overscripted, overhandled, overcoached,<br /><br />overadvised -- and voters can see through it.<br /><br /><br /><br />The latest example is her response to the hostage<br /><br />ordeal at her HQ in New Hampshire. To me, she seemed,<br /><br />above all, privately pleased that she was being given<br /><br />an opportunity to look like she was in control in a crisis.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I bet in reality she was handling the ordeal even<br /><br />better than she was at that appearance; my guess is<br /><br />she was behind the scenes making calls and intelligently<br /><br />assessing the situation -- but that was all off-camera.<br /><br />So her staged reaction seemed less flattering to her than the<br /><br />way her actions probably unfolded off-camera in real time.<br /><br /><br /><br />What I'm trying to say is that the real Hillary would<br /><br />probably be more compelling to voters than the scripted<br /><br />public one.<br /><br /><br /><br />Maybe she should try to tap into the identity she<br /><br />developed at Wellesley College, when she went from<br /><br />caterpillar to butterfly and gave the commencement<br /><br />address and wrote a ballsy senior thesis and had an<br /><br />attracive style, before she married The Viking, as she<br /><br />has affectionately called him.<br /><br /><br /><br />Also, it does take a village, but -- much more important -- it<br /><br />takes villagers. At this point, Hillary has the village, but<br /><br />Obama seems to have a lot of the villagers.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/obama_says_race_ms.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://a.abcnews.com/images/Politics/obama_says_race_ms.jpg" /></a><em>not asking permission to take out bin Laden</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>Barack Obama</strong><br /><br /><br />I've said it before and will say it again: the level<br /><br />of enthusiasm for Obama is an extraordinary political<br /><br />phenomenon -- it's like nothing I've ever seen before in politics<br /><br />(in fact, it's more like rock star adulation).<br /><br /><br /><br />I've already written about seeing him speak (see previous<br /><br />Digressions), so I won't go into that again. But I will<br /><br />say that just yesterday, I walked by shops in downtown Oakland,<br /><br />Calif., and there were Obama placards in barber shop<br /><br />windows and Obama bumper stickers on cars. To date, I<br /><br />have seen exactly one Hillary '08 bumper sticker in<br /><br />the Bay Area, a blue thing on a car that looked like some<br /><br />sort of government vehicle.<br /><br /><br /><br />My advice to Obama is: keep it up with regard to your<br /><br />hard position on finding bin Laden -- it's not only the<br /><br />correct policy, but it will play beautifully against<br /><br />the Republican candidate in November, if you're nominated.<br /><br /><br /><br />I think voters are now picturing each candidate in the<br /><br />Oval Office and one of the things they're picturing is<br /><br />this: If a President Obama received a PDB titled "Bin<br /><br />Laden's Whereabouts in Waziristan Pinned Down," would<br /><br />you believe for one moment that President Barack wouldn't<br /><br />immediately swing into action, marshaling the support of<br /><br />Musharraf and others for a lightning strike in the<br /><br />northwest territories?<br /><br /><br /><br />And voters are also picturing the alternative: a President<br /><br />Hillary who would receive such an PDB and might get<br /><br />over-advised, too cautious, afraid of spending<br /><br />political capital, become over-concerned about how it<br /><br />would look politically if we bombed Wazirstan, analyzing<br /><br />it into fine dust until the moment was lost.<br /><br /><br /><br />In other words, the way they run their campaigns is the<br /><br />way they would likely run their presidencies.<br /><br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://i199.photobucket.com/albums/aa69/djrobotmonster/John-Edwards-President.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://i199.photobucket.com/albums/aa69/djrobotmonster/John-Edwards-President.jpg" /></a><em>he should schedule his withdrawal speech after McCain's next month</em><br /><br /><br /><strong><br />John Edwards</strong><br /><br /><br />When Edwards first appeared on the scene in the primaries<br /><br />in '04, he was electric, like a high voltage wire whipping<br /><br />in a wind storm, like a brand new rock star.<br /><br />Problem is, he began repeating his same speech at virtually<br /><br />every stop -- the Two Americas thing -- and voters began<br /><br />to sense a disingenuousness, a sort of pre-fab presentation.<br /><br />It was like Steve Forbes's "hope, growth and opportunity"<br /><br />bit -- at first it seemed somewhat fresh, and then it became<br /><br />just so much cynical grandstanding. And after being<br /><br />relegated to the second spot on the '04 ticket, and sort<br /><br />of being spanked by Cheney at that one debate,<br /><br />he lost his luster a bit. So when he came back for<br /><br />seconds in early '07, he had the stigma of a loser,<br /><br />and the freshness was way gone. (A sidenote: you know who<br /><br />should probably run for office? Edwards' advisor Kate<br /><br />Michelman, whose speech earlier this year in Berkeley<br /><br />shows she has an engaging charisma.)<br /><br /><br /><br />My only advice for Edwards is (hate to say it): start<br /><br />writing your withdrawal speech, which you might have<br /><br />to give a few weeks from now. Schedule it<br /><br />after McCain's, and the press won't cover it as much.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://ccinsider.comedycentral.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/05/20/romney.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://ccinsider.comedycentral.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/05/20/romney.jpg" /></a> <em>Jesus was born in Provo, and Iran has nukes</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>Mitt Romney</strong><br /><br /><br />Romney is like those pre-Beatles relics of the<br /><br />1960s who used to organize so-called decency rallies,<br /><br />appear with Anita Bryant, and act aghast over the<br /><br />onstage antics of Jim Morrison.<br /><br /><br /><br />His persona would've played nationwide even 15 years<br /><br />ago, back before the dot-com revolution when old<br /><br />guys in polyester suits still ran old-boy old-line<br /><br />companies, and ex-hippies of the Baby Boom generation were<br /><br />their subordinates. Today, however, the ex-hippies <em>are</em><br /><br />the entrenched power, and Romney seems, well, square and<br /><br />antiquated even by the standards of 20-years ago.<br /><br /><br /><br />And frankly, his dreadful religion speech, in which he<br /><br />insulted non-theists while asking for respect for his<br /><br />own belief system, looked more like a withdrawal or<br /><br />resignation speech. (In fact, if you watch his appearance<br /><br />with the sound down, it looks like he's resigning from something.)<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://blog.wired.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/09/24/huckabee_2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://blog.wired.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/09/24/huckabee_2.jpg" /></a><em>the Earth was created 350 years ago</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>Mike Huckabee</strong><br /><br /><br />I don't think I agree with Mike Huckabee on any issue, but<br /><br />he's undeniably likable -- and his affection for Keith Richards<br /><br />shows that he may be more open-minded than he seems. But his<br /><br />views on evolution are, let's face it, straight from a Taliban<br /><br />cave. You have to hope this guy knows better but is pandering<br /><br />to those who don't. Or maybe not. Perhaps he's one of<br /><br />the many who has no regard for evidence-based belief.<br /><br /><br /><br />If he's nominated, he may be a Republican McGovern. Only<br /><br />thing is, the Democrats may also nominate a<br /><br />McGovern -- Obama -- so it would be a battle of the factions.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://jackblood.netfirms.com/home/images/giulianiSweats.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://jackblood.netfirms.com/home/images/giulianiSweats.jpg" /></a><em>looking too long in the rear-view mirror</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>Rudy Giuliani</strong><br /><br /><br />Hearing Giuliani on Russert this morning talking about<br /><br />how he once shut down traffic around the Stock Exchange<br /><br />when he was mayor, or something like that, I was reminded<br /><br />that he's truly a small screen guy, not a big picture policy<br /><br />maker. His focus is always on operations, tactics, details,<br /><br />rather than on strategy, overall planning, policy, and that<br /><br />is why people are sensing he's not really presidential.<br /><br /><br /><br />And notice that his emphasis is always on 9/11 but<br /><br />not on finding ways to stop bin Laden from attacking again.<br /><br /><br /><br />If there were a terrorist attack and my building was on<br /><br />fire, and Giuliani was my neighbor, he'd be the one I'd<br /><br />follow to safety, no doubt about it. But I would not<br /><br />vote to have him deal with the terrorists responsible<br /><br />for the attack, because he tends to act too viscerally;<br /><br />he almost has the mindset of a security guard sometimes<br /><br />(remember when he personally ejected Arafat from Lincoln<br /><br />Center in the Nineties?).<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><em><br />[photo of Hillary by unknown photographer; Obama from abc.com; Edwards from photobucket.com; Huckabee from wired.com; Romney from ccinsider.com; Giuliani from latimes.com.]</em><br /><br />________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 8, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><em>satire</em><br /><br /><strong>The Beatnik versus the Class Clown in 2008?</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglMfEJO-0XGvh81Y02W3TqDlxrRhyAyXiXyuWKdqa69L5dZs0KktRSW5JroeSXYSl3Q7icCtsprcA4oULuYu_dc1w4jhuPDi2U0E9xBwjNcohPd2PdVTF6IWI34QI-3bvbzY1HERPi-Po/s1600-h/scannationallampoon.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5141395532971316658" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglMfEJO-0XGvh81Y02W3TqDlxrRhyAyXiXyuWKdqa69L5dZs0KktRSW5JroeSXYSl3Q7icCtsprcA4oULuYu_dc1w4jhuPDi2U0E9xBwjNcohPd2PdVTF6IWI34QI-3bvbzY1HERPi-Po/s400/scannationallampoon.jpg" /></a> <em>High school yearbook<br />photos of Obama (l) and Huckabee (r)?</em><br /><br /><br />The rising stars this month among the presidential candidates<br /><br />are Barack Obama and Mike Huckabee, and that means we may have<br /><br />a clear, stark choice at the polls this November between two<br /><br />American archetypes: the class clown and the beatnik.<br /><br /><br /><br />And it also appears as if both of them attended C. Estes<br /><br />Kefauver High School in the Sixties, according to my<br /><br />research of the National Lampoon's "1964 High School<br /><br />Yearbook Parody." Could the yearbook photo (above) on the<br /><br />left be Obama (Swisher) and the one on the right Huckabee<br /><br />(Weisenheimer)? Check out the resemblance.<br /><br /><br /><br />And also -- who knew Dennis Kucinich (below) also attended<br /><br />Kefauver High?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6GsUyLXShwv-U9d6LfAQi76CysQWBjjs6cu9BJgNfMNEUxy78tZ4nYittwe-gd_4-f6sHvxMP8waAFjYmrCtg79wdV87VFgHHMadpdPXd7BuIIyAO0htzrfqkl9YTnKdFApUtQXgjw6c/s1600-h/scankucinich.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5141408980513920450" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6GsUyLXShwv-U9d6LfAQi76CysQWBjjs6cu9BJgNfMNEUxy78tZ4nYittwe-gd_4-f6sHvxMP8waAFjYmrCtg79wdV87VFgHHMadpdPXd7BuIIyAO0htzrfqkl9YTnKdFApUtQXgjw6c/s400/scankucinich.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Kucinich in high school?</em><br /><br /><br />And could this former Kefauver student (below) actually be the<br /><br />brilliant singer Amy Winehouse, circa several years ago?<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpoXDHjz57b4nlt3-MQpJC6xceX4oPfJuljrrjClwHrkmkKrVcGYMb9JvAtwgubRvI4etF7zczRjsADpr0UaZx1FCNtYiwGb-ZudQW0_5ZRmh6J6NYvXOs8Rs96OoB2W12mXM0rKhzfK4/s1600-h/scanamywinehouse.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5141410591126656466" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpoXDHjz57b4nlt3-MQpJC6xceX4oPfJuljrrjClwHrkmkKrVcGYMb9JvAtwgubRvI4etF7zczRjsADpr0UaZx1FCNtYiwGb-ZudQW0_5ZRmh6J6NYvXOs8Rs96OoB2W12mXM0rKhzfK4/s400/scanamywinehouse.jpg" /></a><em> Amy Winehouse at Kefauver High?</em><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />[all three clippings above from "The Original National Lampoon 1964 High School Yearbook Parody," 1974 edition.]<br /><br />______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 7, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br />Mitt Romney gave an awful speech yesterday, showing<br /><br />a disrespect for and implied bigotry toward nontheists,<br /><br />while saying, essentially, that he's not going to open<br /><br />up his Mormon beliefs to public scrutiny because<br /><br />he knows full well that such far-out and strange notions<br /><br />couldn't possibly stand up to scrutiny.<br /><br /><br /><br />Well, Mr. Romney, you still have to answer to Ali G.<br /><br />Here's an excerpt from Season 2 of "Da Ali G Show"<br /><br />(wouldn't it be great if the next presidential debate<br /><br />were hosted by Ali G?):<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>ALI G: HOW COME IN SOME RELIGIONS IT'S OK TO HAVE<br /><br />MORE THAN ONE WIFE, LIKE THE MORONS? </strong><br /><br />AUTHOR JOHN GRAY: It's the Mormons or the Muslims. In both those<br /><br />religions it's ok to have more than one wife.<br /><br /><br />[<em>Editor's note: for the record, Mormons no longer practice<br />polygamy, though they still hold other beliefs that are<br />shockingly bizarre.]</em><br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Oooops! I forgot! Gays, guns and god are forbidden<br /><br />topics during a presidential election year, which is<br /><br />why you're hearing absolutely n-o-t-h-i-n-g about gun<br /><br />control in the wake of the Omaha slayings.<br /><br /><br /><br />So I now have a new personal policy. From here in, I'll<br /><br />not extend sympathies to victims of gun violence who<br /><br />weren't in favor of stricter gun regulations before being<br /><br />shot. Because everybody, by now, can see plainly and in full<br /><br />light that gun permissiveness is precisely the cause of all<br /><br />these mass killings.<br /><br /><br /><br />After every one of these slaughters, gun fanatics always<br /><br />say the same thing, and that is: "If a nearby bystander<br /><br />had been armed, the gunman could have been taken out."<br /><br /><br /><br />OK, fine. let's put that theory to the test. Name one<br /><br />major mass shooting incident -- Columbine, Virginia<br /><br />Tech, etc. -- where an armed bystander (not a cop or<br /><br />guard) saved the day by shooting the gunman. Name one.<br /><br /><br /><br />The reason you can't name one is because there isn't<br /><br />one, and the reason there isn't one is because in a<br /><br />random shooting 1) victims are taken by surprise,<br /><br />and 2) it's all over within minutes, before anyone<br /><br />else can lock and load, and 3) the gunman typically<br /><br />ends the rampage by killing himself.<br /><br /><br /><br />Even in robberies that unfold over a longer period of<br /><br />time, there is still massive and unpredictable risk<br /><br />when an armed bystander intervenes (it often ends up<br /><br />more like the robbery sequence (in the pastry shop)<br /><br />in the movie "Boogie Nights" than like a Charles<br /><br />Bronson flick).<br /><br /><br /><br />Look, I was robbed at gunpoint a couple years ago,<br /><br />and I must confess that I would've been extremely<br /><br />pleased if some armed onlooker had shot the gunman<br /><br />dead in the head on the spot; but I also know that<br /><br />that same hypothetical good Samaritan might have missed<br /><br />him and hit me instead.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 6, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br />You always hear the same litany of cliches every<br /><br />time there's some random shooting, whether at Virginia<br /><br />Tech or at this mall or at that school. If the shooter<br /><br />was a teenager or a young person, he or she is invariably<br /><br />described as a loner, disaffected, alienated, etc. (which<br /><br />pretty much describes most teenagers at one time or another,<br /><br />by the way).<br /><br /><br /><br />Never mind that even Lee Harvey Oswald, the archetype of<br /><br />this cliche, was far from a loner: he had a wife, in-laws,<br /><br />a steady job at the Depository with co-workers, and political<br /><br />activist friends.<br /><br /><br /><br />And the Columbine shooters were part of what was virtually<br /><br />a high school fraternity.<br /><br /><br /><br />No, we use the cliche "loner" because, after the fact, after<br /><br />some nutcase does something criminal, suddenly nobody knows<br /><br />him or her, and everybody pretends that the person was some<br /><br />sort of complete stranger.<br /><br /><br />The most salient and telling and important detail about these<br /><br />shooters is this: each one had a gun.<br /><br /><br />A gun. If that sicko in Nebraska hadn't had a rifle yesterday,<br /><br />none of those people at the mall would be dead today. If he<br /><br />had had only his fists to express his misguided<br /><br />rage, maybe one person would have had a black eye before<br /><br />he was restrained by a security guard. If he had had only a<br /><br />knife, he might have injured only one person before someone<br /><br />heroically restrained him.<br /><br /><br /><br />How many of these shootings do we have to have<br /><br />before people realize that we need vastly tighter<br /><br />gun control and the banning of some weapons in this<br /><br />country?<br /><br /><br /><br />Every time something like this happens, gun nuts blow all<br /><br />the smoke they can to obscure the fact that guns were<br /><br />primarily responsible for the tragedy. And<br /><br />everybody seems to forget the eight or 12 mass<br /><br />murders that preceded this one in the past few years alone,<br /><br />Virginia Tech among them.<br /><br /><br />My sympathies to those affected by this tragedy.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 6, 2007<br /><br /><br /><strong>Welcome to the Theistic States of America !</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgBHUZF8xp5T6HcLVo-5Tlh3q93ArPe_SMTkTpdtK7l9Na9NvUIpgwEfZUGvWVdN3UtwFbgzlni2s6pMs0hPnTl2p3XvDBxXpw_ixZfKf8Z9ixDOSefEctaIuBfcaCN3YvTRmGMrV3EVM/s1600-h/scanhuckabeeFLAG.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5140532905969784146" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgBHUZF8xp5T6HcLVo-5Tlh3q93ArPe_SMTkTpdtK7l9Na9NvUIpgwEfZUGvWVdN3UtwFbgzlni2s6pMs0hPnTl2p3XvDBxXpw_ixZfKf8Z9ixDOSefEctaIuBfcaCN3YvTRmGMrV3EVM/s400/scanhuckabeeFLAG.jpg" /></a><br /><em>President Huckabee proposes a couple minor changes to the flag (above).</em><br /><br /><br />It seems as if the same people who object to perceived<br /><br />slights against Muslims or Jews or Christians couldn't<br /><br />care less about the fact that "under god" in the<br /><br />Pledge of Allegiance deeply offends the nontheistic.<br /><br /><br /><br />Those who walk on eggshells because of Muslim<br /><br />touchiness about their religion, who see<br /><br />anti-Semitism under every stone, who bend over<br /><br />backwards to make aspects of Mormonism appear<br /><br />less nutty than they are: such people also<br /><br />show complete insensitivity about imposing theism<br /><br />in a setting that should be free of religion.<br /><br /><br /><br />In this era, it seems that every burqa in America<br /><br />has been given federal landmark status and far-out<br /><br />notions of fundamentalist Christians are considered<br /><br />off-limits to satirists, yet the children of non-theists<br /><br />are virtually forced to engage in religious chants -- and nobody<br /><br />seems to bring up issues of tolerance and sensitivity as it<br /><br />relates to them.<br /><br /><br /><br />It's an outrage, which is why there is now a case pending<br /><br />before the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals about removing<br /><br />"under god" from the Pledge of Allegiance (or, more accurately,<br /><br />restoring the Pledge to its original text).<br /><br /><br /><br />Try to imagine what it feels like to be a public school kid<br /><br />who thinks theistic beliefs are wacko yet is virtually forced<br /><br />to join in a daily pledge that includes, effectively, a group<br /><br />religious chant -- a group religious chant in a school that<br /><br />is funded by taxpayers who are nontheists, Hindus, Christians,<br /><br />etc. ("Group religious chant," by the way, is what "under god"<br /><br />in the Pledge is. And the chant is essentially compulsory<br /><br />because it's implicitly coercive in a school environment.)<br /><br /><br /><strong><br />By contrast, putting "in god we trust" on coins or buildings<br /><br />is not really objectionable, because it's a passive part of the<br /><br />landscape. And regarding Christmas, I and my Jewish and<br /><br />nontheist friends celebrate a secular version of Christmas<br /><br />every year. But all that is very different than forcing a<br /><br />kid in public school to chant the word "god" with his classmates.<br /></strong><br /><br /><br />Nowadays, apparently, you have to throw a violent temper<br /><br />tantrum and riot in order to have your philosophical world<br /><br />view respected. I'm probably more offended by "under god"<br /><br />in the Pledge than many Muslims are by the Mohammed<br /><br />cartoons --- but I'm just nicer and more non-violent<br /><br />about it, hence some feel they can run over my sensibilities<br /><br />with impunity.<br /><br /><br /><br />So when I'm irreverent in my writings toward various<br /><br />religions, I'm merely taking my cue from how I've been<br /><br />treated all my life.<br /><br /><br /><br />To those who defend "under god" in the Pledge by saying<br /><br />that it has no significant religious meaning, I respond<br /><br />with: if it has no significant religious meaning, then<br /><br />why include it? If the two words mean nothing to the<br /><br />faithful but insult me, then why include them? If<br /><br />those two words have no significant religious meaning, then<br /><br />why not replace the words "under God" with, say, "under Allah"?<br /><br />Why not? It's just two insignificant words. How would you<br /><br />feel about that if you were a non-Muslim?<br /><br /><br /><br />The obvious reason is that having public school kids<br /><br />chant "under Allah" in the Pledge would violate the<br /><br />beliefs of non-Muslims, just as "under god" violates my<br /><br />own private beliefs. So why not take out those two words<br /><br />if they insult people who don't buy the theistic fantasy?<br /><br />We're talking about public schools, after all, in a<br /><br />secular society.<br /><br /><br /><br />As I said, the same people who twist themselves into<br /><br />pretzels to understand the illogic of the Teddy Bear<br /><br />Islamists or of the Mormons seem to care not one whit when<br /><br />it comes to respecting the sensibilities of the nontheistic.<br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, I listen to presidential candidates spew cockamamie<br /><br />religious theories -- I think one candidate believes the Earth<br /><br />was formed 350 years ago, another one thinks Jesus was born in<br /><br />Park City during the Ghost Dance of 1872, or something like<br /><br />that -- and much of the press just nods like a bobblehead<br /><br />doll and fails to ask the obvious hard questions: will your<br /><br />policy decisions as president be based on the same non-rationality<br /><br />evident in your religion? Will your decisions be faith-based?<br /><br />Would you demand a higher standard of evidence and proof<br /><br />when determining whether we should wage war than you demand<br /><br />in gauging the truth of the claims in the Bible?<br /><br /><br /><br />No, those questions are verboten. And any kid who refuses to<br /><br />chant about god in school becomes a pariah. Forget about reforming<br /><br />Islam -- America is the nation that needs an Ataturk.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[flag montage by Paul Iorio.]</em><br /><br />___________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 3, 2007<br /><br /><br /><strong>The Fate of the Earth</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXccfv1U2ap1sBs7AAOguJpsMA1egBQ4J8gvH9wk3F9xa5-nVtk0fm6JWTAtqnAAGvMje3vfT_j-ULuma0qJyjAC8gqQnTzQPbgyi9UdiQVk-qpmFT4vdR-eTJxEinl82bLqFaejaSknA/s1600-r/scanstranglove.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139861417897825474" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEDy78xHkH49rhKcV7u_JRh_wWd8PqJ8C9OIZF0So2CD_m_qrZpjdEpA5drqJunDEpWfbIy-xSCIuawYCGYX_Mo0rfLnSAD_qIbsb3gPRnPKQlxn_S899o7KDcSVVqZdGwjJsMsRRaFmg/s400/scanstranglove.jpg" /></a><br /><em>(above) the reason human beings will one day become extinct.</em><br /><br /><br />The funniest movie ever made, Stanley Kubrick's<br /><br />"Dr. Strangelove," is also one of the scariest<br /><br />pictures ever made -- and it doesn't include a<br /><br />single joke. But every time I see it, and I'm<br /><br />sort of embarrassed to admit how many times<br /><br />I've seen it, I laugh and laugh.<br /><br /><br /><br />Kubrick began shooting his comedy about nuclear<br /><br />annihilation 45 years ago last October, back when<br /><br />it looked like much of the human race was poised<br /><br />to die an awful radioactive death. And through<br /><br />the Sixties and Seventies, everyone had a healthy fear<br /><br />of the Bomb, though in the cushy, Seinfeld Nineties --<br /><br />during that cozy period between the end of the<br /><br />Cold War and the attacks of 9/11 ("Peace Breaks Out"<br /><br />was a memorable newspaper headline of the era) --<br /><br />we stopped being so afraid of nukes.<br /><br /><br /><br />Experts diagnosed the proliferation problem many<br /><br />decades ago, but it has only gotten worse over the<br /><br />years. As the number of nations with nukes<br /><br />has mushroomed, we seem to have become less, not more,<br /><br />concerned about it. We hear more talk about global<br /><br />warming nowadays than about nuclear winter, which<br /><br />(if the latter ever arrives) will make even the<br /><br />most extreme predictions of climate change seem<br /><br />quaint and moot.<br /><br /><br /><br />Don't get me wrong, I'm a gigantic admirer of Al Gore's<br /><br />campaign to fight global warming, but when the story of<br /><br />the end of the human race finally unfolds, the villain will<br /><br />probably ultimately be radioactivity, not fluorocarbons, and<br /><br />the truly prescient work will be Jonathan Schell's "The Fate<br /><br />of the Earth," not "An Inconvenient Truth."<br /><br /><br /><br />And it might not be the communists or the jihadists<br /><br />who do us in, but rather some obscure dictator who has had,<br /><br />say, an undiagnosed stroke that has made him or her clinically<br /><br />paranoid.<br /><br /><br /><br />When we sit there in the year 2022, watching tv meteorologists<br /><br />tell us where the radiation cloud is headed today, trying to escape<br /><br />on frozen highways to dodge a high pressure system that<br /><br />will keep a dome of radiation over the area for a week or<br /><br />two, we'll be saying to ourselves, "We saw this coming,<br /><br />yet it still happened." It's like a car skidding on ice<br /><br />and heading for a wall; you can slam on the brakes all you<br /><br />want, but inevitably there's going to be a bad collision.<br /><br /><br /><br />Perhaps there is no solution to nuclear proliferation (just<br /><br />as there's no cure for most metastasized forms of cancer)<br /><br />and the spread of nukes will continue unless, as Schell<br /><br />wrote, we are willing to destroy all nuclear weapons along<br /><br />with the means to produce them, which would also mean<br /><br />reducing ourselves to a 19th century level of<br /><br />technological advancement -- and that would be<br /><br />impossible in any event, because the knowledge to create<br /><br />a nuke would still exist.<br /><br /><br /><br />So the human race has a chronic and probably fatal disease,<br /><br />and as with any chronic illness, we can manage but not cure<br /><br />it. Realistic hope lies in surviving not forever but<br /><br />for as long as we can stave off what is probably<br /><br />inevitable. Perhaps our next president will consider<br /><br />creating a new cabinet-level position -- the Deptartment<br /><br />of Nuclear Weapons Control -- to try to manage, in a<br /><br />more focused fashion, the central crisis of our time.<br /><br /><br /><br />For now, we might as well have a good laugh, courtesy<br /><br />of "Strangelove," about our probable impending doom,<br /><br />because there will come a time -- say, after<br /><br />the gamma burns -- when laughter will be very<br /><br />hard to come by.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><strong>In Berkeley, It's a Two-Man Race: Ron Paul v. Barack Obama</strong><br /><br /><br />What many pundits are failing to note in noting<br /><br />the rise of Mike Huckabee in the Iowa polls is that<br /><br />Huckabee is virtually a favorite son (Iowa borders Arkansas),<br /><br />and favorite sons (like Harkin in Iowa or Tsongas in<br /><br />New Hampshire) have often outpolled the eventual nominee<br /><br />in their home regions.<br /><br /><br /><br />On the Democratic side, the inevitability of Hillary's<br /><br />nomination seems slightly less inevitable lately. I've<br /><br />believed that Barack Obama would make a strong showing<br /><br />since hearing him speak in Oakland last March 17 (see<br /><br />Daily Digression, March 18, 2007). I mean, when a guy on a<br /><br />crutch stands for around two hours in line to see him,<br /><br />when a woman with an oxygen tank stands and<br /><br />waits to catch a glimpse of his passing limo, you<br /><br />know you're dealing with an extraordinarily<br /><br />intense level of political enthusiasm for a<br /><br />candidate.<br /><br /><br /><br />I used to think Obama was unelectable, mostly<br /><br />because of his liberalism, but now I'm thinking...who<br /><br />do the Republicans have to run against him?<br /><br /><br /><br />The GOP doesn't have a formidable candidate. Obama could<br /><br />conceivably win against a weak GOP candidate, particularly<br /><br />in an election year that may also become a recession<br /><br />year -- and there's nothing like a downturn<br /><br />in the economy to feed the public's appetite<br /><br />for dramatic change, which is Obama's calling card.<br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, John Edwards is looking increasingly<br /><br />like Dick Gephardt circa 2004 -- a candidate<br /><br />past his expiration date for freshness -- and my<br /><br />guess is he'll be withdrawing next month,<br /><br />probably along with John McCain and Fred Thompson<br /><br />and a couple others who will likely<br /><br />exit presidential politics for good.<br /><br /><br /><br />In these weeks before the California primary, which<br /><br />could be crucial, I've documented the political mood in<br /><br />perennially activist Berkeley, Calif., by taking some<br /><br />some photos of bumper stickers and placards<br /><br />over the past couple weeks, and here they are:<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ00KcqH-cElzhecb0w150Fi_FTisZgs6LkPXNYfo1y9aHDxQuyaAKw2JCGNPyNoSXnOJgjd4lg-h63kU9w1fhVWAM-iPqqneOFtc-VE_RmNB7IxbFVyx7aDOfYU16My2LHaZgPqPY3g/s1600-r/scanstrangeobama08.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139877133183161554" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxxoJYiq6Lm0N0Gb2YaUlFGS7ZJE4b0k9zPL5itQb_12PuplR6PSyQkte87asYPKF5EdVw44Y9-Yx0zYGwgP9KYj0YMpiaMG6r1wevS1vDTD6SfelMWSagbZnE8sUei2oCoiRqaArxMw/s400/scanstrangeobama08.jpg" /></a> <em>there are lots of Obama stickers in Berkeley, but very few Hillary ones. </em><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjrU2PEXNB6hlBlYex2mESzHJ0Bvzw-0nxlqUlj0u9MehhS64VgXwn59FY2jBHOGleiBEzBCph7wIGffhKunyF193iembYsnc56oeqLFIIl-7TjsVSMp3Y8hWuVVnUldhtE2Li1b3Dsw/s1600-r/scanronpaul.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139878486097859810" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpHPiaKhOpLiz39KrnnTnd32oViiknUpy94rnXyVeM7JJiktOGvQka_I8z3Yyf2ztTmdIaCxS6xmbucOmN4Hqap4M4PEX-vsWwG1VpjtqfcGz8F9y4fyej0ey0fszrptkTMacNLRkHWQ/s400/scanronpaul.jpg" /></a><em> Who woulda thunk it? A GOP Texan is actually popular in Berkeley!</em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilaodOYL8BdFFUVeTLVLSNKaETbQyRzokjyZ88siJ5DfQaleunidKo1LXaj9f8MKpg8O5kdZsZx4eI-Tl44istun6KzW6KOMi92_lPi-1-gpN6EkkTSXiezs_SkvDMGulRXMBaMi73IA/s1600-r/scanedwardskerry.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139879675803800818" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgfMOLy0dUM8cN8Brq9wth7RNIO8UXjVQgzLlbnND7jl3wTQOq1AA-U0Y5tW0f5be2funTZKPucQSBk9YWBooyvlHWIDeB11QebblFeCXWuRXpez-qev_Gfvm0kcInkqtF0-ogTjLv_gw/s400/scanedwardskerry.jpg" /></a><br /><em>The only Edwards stickers I've seen are Kerry/Edwards '04 leftovers. </em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWRD20fp5fy75bZ9shROiVCpCmlyc0R6Xful96FVpgqNU7BznI-DgDSiIbBf9ZCExo_8aF2eCan_yK1Bg021qvEBUC7cXuEftEOw_EYunDSjchqC4CRoDc7T7Kc5kT0hmEM_vTHdJuYg/s1600-r/scangasprices.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139880801085232386" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-XG0lIV8FiYfvQfuBRQrmjxdPVAdwsRNIYywd_mchAgjcjqdezoCbnnklEFztCt1I0N28UyjsOQ67Xh8R12cruosnjs5iOGO6yEiWZpBHYRfv3xhk1MvWRvl6sRhVEFuePi4lBQ7XfQ/s400/scangasprices.jpg" /></a><br /><em>fueling voter anger. Will 2008 be a recession year?</em><br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_t5jdiJISjMUobYoIBYVHEJquHivaGpXJPOTUbYJHsJqJvCduN47QGeJRFMW8MdttCeKzHz_2VfcNYV-jwKMrQNhegxS3qOMY7I3stkH1Mn0sKo0TvJX4yrVoQOo8VFs-Y1jxHLwF8w/s1600-r/scantreesittersign.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5139882149704963346" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRHeAB-2nMMzc0zP8TfqXibhI-xXx63UZAscTivKn4HjAIe3__UcDgPk4Dw47NXLUkipAODqvEip9KggHfGULNFOUFGMUQYUJSfHVGt7HxzjQlC0YOvFOqkN7jI1SQP4pE6wsa7X-vLw/s400/scantreesittersign.jpg" /></a> <em>The tree-sitters in Berkeley, who celebrated their 1st anniversary in the oaks yesterday, have evidently expanded their agenda. as their sign shows. </em><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />___________________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for December 1, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>The Teddy Bear Islamists</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://bearsonboard.org/teddy%20bear.gif"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://bearsonboard.org/teddy%20bear.gif" /></a><em>jihadists riot over the darndest things! ("and if I ever have a teddy bear, I think I'm gonna name him Bill! George! anything but Mohammed!") </em><br /><br /><br /><br />There's not an easy solution to the culture clashes now<br /><br />going on in the Benelux nations and in France. Starting<br /><br />with the unforgivable assassination of film maker Theo<br /><br />van Gogh by Mohammed Bouyeri in '04 to the Islamic violence<br /><br />against European cartoonists in '05 to the current riots in<br /><br />France, the most liberal parts of western Europe are seeing<br /><br />the weeds strangle the flowers in the garden.<br /><br /><br /><br />The problem boils down to this: Muslim miitant immigrants are<br /><br />very unlike immigrant groups of the past in that they want<br /><br />to destroy the liberal framework that allows them to thrive in<br /><br />their new homes.<br /><br /><br /><br />The Muslim extremist immigrants in Amsterdam and Stockholm<br /><br />are permitted to pray as they choose and speak as they wish,<br /><br />yet these newcomers are fundamentally hostile to free speech<br /><br />and freedom of religion.<br /><br /><br /><br />Yes, we must let a thousand flowers bloom, but we should<br /><br />never allow weeds that strangle the flowers to grow in<br /><br />the garden.<br /><br /><br /><br />Elsewhere, Muslim fundamentalists continue to show a shocking<br /><br />intolerance for even the most innocuous free expression.<br /><br />The latest case involves schoolteacher Gillian Gibbons who<br /><br />is being jailed in Sudan for letting her students name a teddy bear<br /><br />Mohammed.<br /><br /><br /><br />First, don't give me any cultural relativism crap, because it<br /><br />doesn't apply in this case (common sense does), and we shouldn't<br /><br />be making excuses for fanatics who act his way. Anyone who would<br /><br />punish someone for allowing her students to name a teddy bear<br /><br />Mohammed is backward. Period.<br /><br /><br /><br />Judge Mohammed Youssef of the Kartoum North Criminal Court is<br /><br />simply a reactionary -- and even more backward than Sonny Perude<br /><br />and his holy raindancers.<br /><br /><br /><br />I lived abroad for extended periods when I was a kid, so<br /><br />I understand reflexively that every nation has both its<br /><br />throwbacks and its progressives and its moderates and, frankly,<br /><br />the same poltiical grid we have here, more or less.<br /><br />There are red states and blue states (or provinces) in Nigeria<br /><br />and in France and in Japan and in Sudan. And my early experience<br /><br />helps me to see through an accent or a turban in order to<br /><br />recognize someone as the David Duke of the Ukraine or the<br /><br />Eugene McCarthy of Pakistan.<br /><br /><br /><strong><br />I find that it's always the most provincial Americans -- who<br /><br />never traveled outside the U.S. in their youths and<br /><br />were raised by redneck parents -- who now tend to overcorrect<br /><br />for their own provinciality by trying too hard to see a logic<br /><br />that isn't there in the jihadist argument. </strong><br /><br /><br /><br />The Teddy Bear Islamists are not speaking from logic or<br /><br />reason but from an early religious indoctrination that<br /><br />they are not able to overcome in adulthood.<br /><br /><br /><br />If the Third Reich taught us anything, it's that an entire<br /><br />culture of millions of people can all be very wrong, can<br /><br />all suffer from a collective mental illness, can all have<br /><br />no reasonable side to their side of the story.<br /><br /><br /><br />There are those who only half-heartedly defend Gibbons by<br /><br />saying, "She didn't mean to blaspheme," as if her punishment<br /><br />would be somehow justifiable if she had <em>intended </em>some<br /><br />religious irreverence.<br /><br /><br /><br />Whether she intended or didn't intend to disrespect Islam<br /><br />(and she obviously didn't), she doesn't belong in jail.<br /><br />Religious free expression -- whether in favor of a<br /><br />religion or in opposition to it or in satirizing it -- should<br /><br />not be penalized anywhere, and all laws forbidding blasphemy<br /><br />should be scrapped as antiques from a less enlightened era.<br /><br /><br /><br />Of course, the fanatics have every right to be offended<br /><br />by whatever offends them but have absolutely no right to<br /><br />get violent about it and should work on developing<br /><br />alternate ways to express their anger instead of reaching<br /><br />for the violence option every time someone tells a religious<br /><br />joke they don't like. And they should<br /><br />learn to be tolerant and to appreciate (or at least not<br /><br />kill) the diversity of a thousand flowers blooming.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />[photo of teddy bear from bearsonboard.org.]<br /><br />________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 19, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>If I Were Running All Television News, Here's What I'd Do</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://www.glamour.com/images/news/2006/11/near01_katiecouric.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.glamour.com/images/news/2006/11/near01_katiecouric.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Create a prime-time show called "Conversations with Katie Couric."</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>GIVE KATIE COURIC HER OWN SHOW:</strong> CBS has<br /><br />miscast Katie, which is easy to do because she is a bit<br /><br />too hard for "Today" but not quite hard enough<br /><br />for "The CBS Evening News." And that's why CBS<br /><br />should take her off the "Evening News" and create<br /><br />a prime time (10pm) show for her, modeled<br /><br />loosely on Murrow's "Person to Person," where<br /><br />her gift for gab can flourish. Call it "Conversations<br /><br />with Katie Couric," a weekly interview-centered<br /><br />series with Couric doing the "get" interview of each<br /><br />week; the first half would begin with five minutes of<br /><br />breaking or headline news and then move into newsy<br /><br />interviews, while the second half would feature Q&As<br /><br />with entertainment figures, who would also perform at<br /><br />the end of each show.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><a href="http://www.hpbc.com/images/Matt-Lauer.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.hpbc.com/images/Matt-Lauer.jpg" /></a><br /><em>CBS's Matt Lauer?</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>MATT LAUER TO "60 MINUTES":</strong> Lauer's interviewing<br /><br />has become much sharper after all these years -- to the<br /><br />point where he now sounds like he'd fit right in at<br /><br />"60 Minutes." It's time for him to take the next<br /><br />step up.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.casieonline.org/GLC/Kay_Katty_100.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.casieonline.org/GLC/Kay_Katty_100.jpg" /></a><br /><em>International velvet -- but with a tough Q&A style. </em><br /><br /><br /><strong>KATTY KAY TO "SIXTY MINUTES," TOO?:</strong> Don't let the<br /><br />velvet manner fool you -- she's a surprisingly tough interviewer<br /><br />and would also be a strong addition to "60 Minutes," though<br /><br />she's not quite at the Lesley Stahl level (who is?).<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.xyhd.tv/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/image9.png"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.xyhd.tv/wp-content/uploads/2007/06/image9.png" /></a><br /><em>"Am I the only one who notices that people eventually retire?!"</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>REPLACE ANDY ROONEY WITH MAUREEN DOWD: </strong><br /><br />Who will replace Rooney, who has served long and<br /><br />humorously for his network, when he leaves? Could<br /><br />Maureen Dowd be persuaded to contribute a weekly endnote?<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/9117/snap2401zh.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/9117/snap2401zh.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Lots of guys see her and lose control of at least two glands. </em><br /><br /><br />ERIN BURNETT, "TODAY" HOST?: I'm suspicious of anyone who<br /><br />gets a seal of approval from the odious Rush Limbaugh, but<br /><br />there's no denying that lots of men lose control of their salivary<br /><br />(and other) glands when they see Burnett. Plus she has<br /><br />this rare ability to say memorable things about very<br /><br />dry topics (there has never been a housing recession that<br /><br />hasn't precipitated a general recession, for instance).<br /><br />And she's postively carbonated. If I ran NBC News, I'd make<br /><br />her a co-anchor of "Today" immediately.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://forum2006.nd.edu/images/speakers/gifill.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://forum2006.nd.edu/images/speakers/gifill.jpg" /></a><br /><em>A natural at being in charge.</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>"WASHINGTON WEEK" SUGGESTIONS: </strong>Gwen Ifill,<br /><br />who should probably be credited with the fall of Trent Lott<br /><br />(remember her show on the Friday before the Lott storm?), runs<br /><br />a usually terrific program. But there should be more David Sanger,<br /><br />Linda Greenhouse, Martha Raddatz (she gets better each time<br /><br />out), Janine Zacharia (hey, a reporter who's actually not<br /><br />afraid to be inspired!), Janet Hook, E.J. Dionne. Less Michael<br /><br />Duffy, less Joan Biskupic, far less Gebe Martinez,<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://nymag.com/daily/intel/20070301gibson.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://nymag.com/daily/intel/20070301gibson.jpg" /></a><br /><em>An appearance on Leno might even it up with Williams. </em><br /><br /><br /><strong>BEST NIGHTLY NEWS ANCHOR</strong>: Charles Gibson remains<br /><br />the best of the anchors by many measures but Brian Williams<br /><br />is close behind. Funny thing is, Williams's surprisingly<br /><br />humorous SNL turn has actually made Gibson appear a bit<br /><br />over-serious by contrast. Can a Gibson appearance on Leno or<br /><br />Letterman be far away?<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://www.cbc.ca/cp/media/071114/X111402AU.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://www.cbc.ca/cp/media/071114/X111402AU.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Astonishingly awful.</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>FIRE NANCY GRACE:</strong> Shrill and wrong-headed, Nancy<br /><br />Grace shouldn't work another day in journalism until she admits<br /><br />her failings in the biased coverage of the Duke Three case.<br /><br />(Shouldn't there be a penalty for being wrong and a reward<br /><br />for being right in tv journalism?)<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsDhiwCV2cwWLz4rRonvmkbWpBMY_5fKY4Q8TwTTHTaTfnuIWlgvshv7cOXpmAMxVKAebOuXtrZ2RlufPcmVcpZaqw24pf9pJ4yHMdT8ePG3HCcnSAReRpJJdE-Lckf3k5XMXplj3A7iU/s1600-h/scancarolynjohnson.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5134382489473601458" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsDhiwCV2cwWLz4rRonvmkbWpBMY_5fKY4Q8TwTTHTaTfnuIWlgvshv7cOXpmAMxVKAebOuXtrZ2RlufPcmVcpZaqw24pf9pJ4yHMdT8ePG3HCcnSAReRpJJdE-Lckf3k5XMXplj3A7iU/s400/scancarolynjohnson.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Amazing grace.</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>CAROLYN JOHNSON TO ABC</strong>: Still mostly unknown to<br /><br />national audiences, this local anchor at the ABC affiliate here in<br /><br />the Bay Area is brainy and refined and pretty. If I were<br /><br />running ABC News, I'd bring her to the network by (initially)<br /><br />having her do some on-air health and science<br /><br />reports for "World News." (Her colleague, Dan Ashley, is<br /><br />also impressive.)<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvqUokHGo_CsKA_hIZ6ccLOlOzrg-85Onvy67Q5cQ19bXsZkkb_DX2E5O4kZ3Urz4zv_sDfOW-02GLcJFbUKrf5b9t3LXL0_nMMxiProNWH8o649NaNY7Ej8nLJGx1AlWFuT2SSvnfQ9w/s1600-h/gradjimcarroll.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5134385710699073474" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvqUokHGo_CsKA_hIZ6ccLOlOzrg-85Onvy67Q5cQ19bXsZkkb_DX2E5O4kZ3Urz4zv_sDfOW-02GLcJFbUKrf5b9t3LXL0_nMMxiProNWH8o649NaNY7Ej8nLJGx1AlWFuT2SSvnfQ9w/s400/gradjimcarroll.jpg" /></a><br /><em>KPIX's coverage of the Jill Carroll hostage crisis.</em><br /><br /><strong>AND FINALLY, LOCALLY: FIX PIX</strong> Though there's<br /><br />a lot of talent at KPIX, the CBS affiliate in San Francisco,<br /><br />the news division is almost comically error prone <em>(see photo).<br /><br /></em>And it also has a morning anchor who pronounces "fiscal"<br /><br />physical. Improvement required.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[photo credits: Couric pic from Glamour.com; Lauer from hbbc.com; kay from casieonline.com; Rooney from xyhd.tv; Burnett from imageshack.com; Ifill from forum2006.nd.edu; Gibson from nymag.com; Grace from cbc.ca; Johnson by Paul Iorio; KPIX by Paul Iorio.]</em><br /><br />___________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 15, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br />If the 2008 presidential race were determined by a<br /><br />tally of bumper stickers, Barack Obama would become<br /><br />the Democratic nominee and Ron Paul would be the GOP<br /><br />candidate -- at least in the San Francisco Bay Area!<br /><br /><br /><br />Hillary bumper stickers are around but not very numerous,<br /><br />Edwards stickers exist mostly in the form of leftover<br /><br />Kerry/Edwards '04 stickers (and there is a surprising number<br /><br />of 'em still around), and the Kucinich-bumper-sticker-epidemic<br /><br />of early '07 has sort of faded like UFOs in the mist (to mix<br /><br />a metaphor). But "Obama '08" can be seen on a lot of fenders in<br /><br />the area.<br /><br /><br /><br />Lately, both in San Francisco and Berkeley, Ron Paul<br /><br />stickers and posters have been cropping up; I saw one<br /><br />sticker on the UC Berkeley campus the other week and<br /><br />a poster in the window of an apartment in north<br /><br />San Francisco the other day.<br /><br /><br /><br />Which leads to an intriguing question: suppose (and<br /><br />this is very unlikely, admittedly) the nominees are<br /><br />Hillary and Ron Paul (who wins in some populist Internet<br /><br />uprising)? There would then be a Republican candidate<br /><br />to the left of the Democratic nominee on the war, causing<br /><br />traditional Dems to vote Paul and trad Republicans to<br /><br />vote Hillary.<br /><br /><br /><br />To complicate matters, I saw a chilling bumper sticker<br /><br />for sale on a stand on Telegraph Avenue in Berkeley the<br /><br />other day, and it read: "Nader '08." Of course,<br /><br />in the above scenario, Nader would be in the bizarre<br /><br />position of siphoning votes from the Republican candidate<br /><br />this time. Go figure.<br /><br /><br />* * *<br /><br /><br />Now that Marvel Comics has put some of its superhero<br /><br />comics online, can we expect some of the indies<br /><br />to follow suit?<br /><br /><br /><br />Specifically, wouldn't it be nice to have cyber-access to<br /><br />Daniel Clowes's "Ghost World"?<br /><br /><br /><br />Flipping through one of the few "Ghost World"s included<br /><br />in Clowes's "Eightball" series in the 1990s, I was<br /><br />reminded of the great powder blue twilight look of the<br /><br />thing (the movie adaptation was amazing, but I keep<br /><br />wondering whether it could have been filmed in blue/black<br /><br />and white like the strip).<br /><br /><br /><br />Anyway, for those who want to see "Ghost World" online,<br /><br />here's a taste: the first page of the episode included in<br /><br />"Eightball" #16:<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPLuS8IKr9rMoqKfnaNoAw4PsEBFZ9igyJrfeU9q_XPvNceVlfJFCnkkRIex-Vry63DCW58yrhJRM5w1O_FNkx3whjoJlCykSrpKrGhv-lTP0FwnMugi3hjYJmAdBOQMETwGpHTvO-Lys/s1600-h/scanghostworld.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5133149722190499618" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPLuS8IKr9rMoqKfnaNoAw4PsEBFZ9igyJrfeU9q_XPvNceVlfJFCnkkRIex-Vry63DCW58yrhJRM5w1O_FNkx3whjoJlCykSrpKrGhv-lTP0FwnMugi3hjYJmAdBOQMETwGpHTvO-Lys/s400/scanghostworld.jpg" /></a><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 14, 2007<br /><br /><br />Isn't it interesting that Sonny Perdue waited<br /><br />until the AccuWeather Five Day Forecast was<br /><br />solid before doing his kooky pray-for-rain<br /><br />thing on the Georgia state Capitol steps? As<br /><br />the Church Lady might put it, "How convenient."<br /><br /><br /><br />Days before the pray-in, meteorologists were<br /><br />predicting thunderstorms by Thursday in the<br /><br />Atlanta area.<br /><br /><br /><br />So now it's inevitable that some cornball tv news<br /><br />anchor will get on the air on Thursday and say, "And<br /><br />finally on this broadcast: today it rained in<br /><br />the Atlanta metro area. In fact, it was a soaker,<br /><br />just what the parched peach state needed. And this<br /><br />comes merely two days after the governor of Georgia<br /><br />prayed for rain on the steps of the state<br /><br />Capitol. [<em>Reganesque pause]</em>Could<br /><br />it be that someone up there likes him?"<br /><br /><br /><br />Meanwhile, here are some other things Perdue might do to<br /><br />create a rainstorm:<br /><br />1. Avoid stepping on cracks in the sidewalk<br /><br />2. Sacrifice a lamb and a goat, and co-mingle their blood with<br />parsley on top<br /><br /><br />For now, Perdue's imitation of the Taliban, which also believes<br /><br />god and government should be one, will have to suffice.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />_____________________________________________<br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 12, 2007<br /><br /><br /><strong>First-hand report on the oil spill in San Francisco Bay</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF5Qq0zpDPeKpL1IGn0gSBzIDiaIThOpuCddjHVDsSyVC_T5gyZBbeOe-aVDIEk5kQDiKm-nViwALNKdjv5E48k_VXcTmr_0O-vRJTdgssx5VU4IObg29ia91pPtocV30L_D1fLOiWW0c/s1600-h/scanoilsignboat.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5132074963649573634" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF5Qq0zpDPeKpL1IGn0gSBzIDiaIThOpuCddjHVDsSyVC_T5gyZBbeOe-aVDIEk5kQDiKm-nViwALNKdjv5E48k_VXcTmr_0O-vRJTdgssx5VU4IObg29ia91pPtocV30L_D1fLOiWW0c/s400/scanoilsignboat.jpg" /></a><br /><strong>"Just come on down to the shoreline/Where the water used to be." -- Steve Forbert</strong><br /><em>Above: San Francisco Bay, yesterday afternoon. (photo by Paul Iorio)</em><br /><br /><br />Yesterday afternoon I took an eight-mile hike<br /><br />through San Francisco, mostly to see and<br /><br />photograph the damage from the oil spill that<br /><br />happened near the Bay Bridge last Wednesday.<br /><br /><br /><br />Walking along the north shore, I saw some places<br /><br />that were devastated by the slick and others that appeared<br /><br />to be untouched, though a lot of the shoreline was<br /><br />cordoned off with ribbons -- and "Danger" signs were<br /><br />ubiquitous.<br /><br /><br /><br />The worst I saw was just west of Fisherman's<br /><br />Wharf, around what is called Aquatic Park, where<br /><br />gooey black oil was coating some rocks (but not<br /><br />others) as if someone had splattered black paint<br /><br />on them. I saw several Gulls with oil on them, but<br /><br />none completely covered with it; one had oil on the<br /><br />left side of its neck and on the bottoms<br /><br />of its feet <em>(see photo</em>), the latter being<br /><br />the most common condition among affected birds.<br /><br />The contaminated Gulls and ducks appeared to be<br /><br />notably less energetic and vibrant than the other<br /><br />birds around them.<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiIyV0MSYQHKYQbdJ6IHfoxHlMvQiMCfpFIfqbcPyFeSymoyUWXgcrLYaznQh7_NQe14etzSKY7IDH1nOC_rXRGXk17az8s3Yin6UBPFyfTpJxo52Lq1WeJ0P1bNakCVq4nnLo3wqdoMI/s1600-h/scanoilbird.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5132078223529751314" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiIyV0MSYQHKYQbdJ6IHfoxHlMvQiMCfpFIfqbcPyFeSymoyUWXgcrLYaznQh7_NQe14etzSKY7IDH1nOC_rXRGXk17az8s3Yin6UBPFyfTpJxo52Lq1WeJ0P1bNakCVq4nnLo3wqdoMI/s400/scanoilbird.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Bird stained by oil on the left side of its neck (and on its feet), on the north shoreline of San Francisco, November 11, 2007. (Photo by Paul Iorio)</em><br /><br /><br />Elsewhere, I didn't see any boats in the Marina<br /><br />blackened (unlike the ones that were reportedly<br /><br />damaged in Sausalito) and didn't see much spillage<br /><br />along some of the shore north of Crissy Field to<br /><br />the Golden Gate Bridge area.<br /><br /><br /><br />All told, the real horror is that one of the<br /><br />greatest bays on the planet could have been<br /><br />thoroughly ruined for many years if the<br /><br />Cosco Busan's fuel tank had had an even slightly<br /><br />larger rupture. One way to try to stop oil spills<br /><br />in the future might be to drastically increase the<br /><br />fines against companies involved, so that they<br /><br />have an extreme financial incentive to make sure<br /><br />they don't put a drunk in the captain's seat or sail<br /><br />a ship that is even slightly faulty.<br /><br /><br /><br />For now, the Coast Guard might do well to post new<br /><br />signs that quote the old song by Steve Forbert:<br /><br />"Oil, oil/Don't buy it at the station/You can<br /><br />have it now for free/Just come on down to the<br /><br />shoreline/Where the water used to be."<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrvs6k50n4nnf6pwf9qcsD8AjE0YN5z7VWe24b03FaS7G8kmeViMqrbUvTadD0R_3qGxNZMAxA9D_NBaWv2eUAoMIw6A8sHjwMCZI1eKwxBu4SWQhbQKn5vXMs9IJX4jerFYHGjdLlH4Y/s1600-h/scanoilrocks.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5132080903589344034" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrvs6k50n4nnf6pwf9qcsD8AjE0YN5z7VWe24b03FaS7G8kmeViMqrbUvTadD0R_3qGxNZMAxA9D_NBaWv2eUAoMIw6A8sHjwMCZI1eKwxBu4SWQhbQKn5vXMs9IJX4jerFYHGjdLlH4Y/s400/scanoilrocks.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Oil on the rocks near San Francisco's Aquatic Park, November 11, 2007. (photo by Paul Iorio.)</em><br /><br />_______________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 11, 2007<br /><br /><br /><br /><strong>Remembering Norman Mailer</strong><br /><br /><a href="http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/2669909.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=6E41E83E90A345BD0E799C227B09AFABA55A1E4F32AD3138"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" border="0" alt="" src="http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/2669909.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=6E41E83E90A345BD0E799C227B09AFABA55A1E4F32AD3138" /></a><br /><br />My only first-hand encounter with Norman Mailer was<br /><br />a distant one and happened in February 1989 in Manhattan,<br /><br />at a PEN reading in support of Salman Rushdie, freshly<br /><br />marked for death by the Ayatollah Khomeini. Mailer<br /><br />spoke and also read from "The Satanic Verses," and<br /><br />the event was interrupted by a bomb scare of some<br /><br />sort -- though he was completely undaunted by that<br /><br />fact and even a bit fired up by it.<br /><br /><br /><br />From the podium, Mailer noted that telephoned bomb<br /><br />threats only cost a quarter to make -- and then he<br /><br />challenged the religious right of Islam: "Blow out your<br /><br />farts," he roared, quoting Jean Genet.<br /><br /><br /><br />It was a memorable moment -- virtually everyone in the audience<br /><br />was emboldened by Mailer at a time when we needed to<br /><br />be emboldened.<br /><br /><br /><br />Sure, he had his personal flaws. He really couldn't be credibly<br /><br />accused of modesty (one of his books was even titled<br /><br />"Advertisements for Myself"), but then modesty is an overrated<br /><br />virtue, much easier to achieve once you've already received<br /><br />your due (hey, Muhammad Ali, who Mailer vividly wrote about,<br /><br />made pure poetry out of immodesty).<br /><br /><br /><br />Truthfulness is more important. So is insight. And his very<br /><br />best work had plenty of both -- and the power to make readers<br /><br />see the world in brand new ways.<br /><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br /><em>[photo of Mailer from ViewImages.com; photographer unknown.]</em><br /><br />______________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 9, 2007<br /><br /><br />Since I've been focusing on the 1960s in the last<br />couple columns, here are two more Sixties-related<br />DVDs of note:<br /><br /><br /><strong>"It's all the same street,"</strong> sings the Grateful Dead's<br /><br />Bob Weir on a DVD called "Rock & Roll Goldmine." The<br /><br />familiar lyric, of course, is from the Dead's "Truckin',"<br /><br />which they perform live at an unidentified concert. But<br /><br />the reason for watching is there's a wonderfully<br /><br />spontaneous moment when Weir completely blanks out<br /><br />as the song begins, missing the first verse and catching up<br /><br />only during the "same street" line. It's revealing to see the<br /><br />good-natured way both Jerry Garcia and Weir react to the<br /><br />miscue -- and it's a nice live version of the song.<br /><br /><br /><br />Also, now that the 25th anniversary of Michael Jackson's<br /><br />"Thriller" is being celebrated, perhaps it's time for a<br /><br />fresh re-evaluation of Jackson. A good place to start<br /><br />is the footage of the Jackson Five's first performance,<br /><br />in 1969, on "The Ed Sullivan Show" (available on disc three<br /><br />of Sullivan's "Rock 'n' Roll Classics" series).<br /><br /><br /><br />Sullivan is not just enthusiastic but in genuine awe<br /><br />after watching 10-year-old Michael Jackson and his<br /><br />brothers light up the place with "I Wonder Who's Loving<br /><br />Her Now." And he applauds Diana Ross, who's in the audience,<br /><br />for her gargantuan A&R find.<br /><br /><br />"The little fella in front is incredible," says Sullivan,<br /><br />seeming almost dazed by the band.<br /><br /><br /><br />Michael Jackson's performance was both dazzling and sad;<br /><br />dazzling because you could see what an epochal talent<br /><br />Jackson was; but sad because...well, he looked and acted<br /><br />more like a pressured adult than he does today. At age 10,<br /><br />he acted like a 40-year-old, and at age 40, he acted like a<br /><br />10-year-old.<br /><br /><br />The expression on his face tells us everything we need<br /><br />to know about the very adult pressures he was being saddled<br /><br />with as a kid (show biz deadlines, contracts, complex cues,<br /><br />etc.). Sure, we all danced to the sounds of Michael Jackson's<br /><br />lost childhood -- sounded great, didn't it? -- but<br /><br />many of us now have no sympathy for the freakish adult that<br /><br />loss has produced.<br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br /><br />_______________________________________________<br /><br /><br /><br />THE DAILY DIGRESSION<br /><br />for November 8, 2007<br /><br /><br /><strong>Brokaw's "Boom!" and My Own Subjective Remembrances of the 1960s</strong><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAm51D9YzUvpC2OIbPkKEvD7TQlvPVKLSuolPYAWzIg3WnJIfS0OUsKR2QvVIEZZinltaQIPSVsJNh8IGolUwCwu6bGb_jul20Pa_qkiqNyCf3xP0R8osq8_5XjzgXfK4Pch_YgJyRzM8/s1600-h/scanmonkeescar.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130512875454083714" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAm51D9YzUvpC2OIbPkKEvD7TQlvPVKLSuolPYAWzIg3WnJIfS0OUsKR2QvVIEZZinltaQIPSVsJNh8IGolUwCwu6bGb_jul20Pa_qkiqNyCf3xP0R8osq8_5XjzgXfK4Pch_YgJyRzM8/s400/scanmonkeescar.jpg" /></a><br /><em>the suburban kids of WWII vets came of age in the<br />1960s and looked something like this.<br />(photo by Paul Iorio)</em><br /><br /><br />Now that Tom Brokaw is making the rounds and talking up<br /><br />his new book, "Boom!," about the 1960s, here are a few of my own<br /><br />subjective remembrances of the Sixties.<br /><br /><br /><br />First, there was a huge difference between the older<br /><br />baby boomers, born around 1940 like Brokaw (the<br /><br />Elvis-to-Beatles generation) and the younger ones,<br /><br />born around 1957, as I was (the Beatles-to-Led Zeppelin<br /><br />generation).<br /><br /><br /><br />When Brokaw was eight years old, Perry Como and<br /><br />Peggy Lee were duking it out for dominance on the<br /><br />music charts.<br /><br /><br /><br />When I was eight years old, everyone was talking<br /><br />about the rivalry between the Beatles and the Stones.<br /><br /><br /><br />And the next year, kids my age were wondering<br /><br />whether the Monkees would eclipse the Beatles.<br /><br /><br /><br />Yes, there was a moment, just a moment, if you<br /><br />were between eight and twelve years old in the fall<br /><br />of 1966 (Brokaw was 26), just after the Beatles had<br /><br />played their last-ever live gig but before the release<br /><br />of "Strawberry Fields Forever," when it looked like<br /><br />the Monkees, with the one-two punch of "Clarksville"<br /><br />and "I'm a Believer," might actually overtake the<br /><br />Beatles (that was the-talk-of-the-recess-yard when I<br /><br />was in the 4th grade and still carrying around my<br /><br />Monkees lunchbox -- talk that was poo-pooed by my hip<br /><br />babysitter, who knew better and would always remove my<br /><br />Herman's Hermits and Monkees and Beatles 45s from<br /><br />the turntable and put on full-length LPs by the<br /><br />Mamas and the Papas, the Beatles, the Supremes, the<br /><br />Beatles, the Lovin' Spoonful, the Beatles, etc.).<br /><br /><br /><br />I sometimes think the Sixties actually began when Khrushchev<br /><br />made his famous space-age "flying" gesture with his hands<br /><br />during the Kitchen Debate with Nixon in 1959 -- a sign<br /><br />that neo-psychedelic perception had already<br /><br />started to permeate the mainstream.<br /><br /><br /><br />It's hard to say when the 1970s began, but I do know the<br /><br />1960s ended for good when the Ramones released their<br /><br />anti-hippie debut in 1976 (see photo below).<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZD-BwvsZw7zrLttLvcvQFlGmu_oUhCV9XkA_q_nL3D7NkCEFazS8lIEymFmJXtjq-xy_8Qg2ifwnTM3AHIHx3qwJtMMLNtL_MmdGeamBMRKRv8PcApBTFDIeQ2sdC7TG954HQxgdw0I8/s1600-h/scanramones.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130527332314002146" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZD-BwvsZw7zrLttLvcvQFlGmu_oUhCV9XkA_q_nL3D7NkCEFazS8lIEymFmJXtjq-xy_8Qg2ifwnTM3AHIHx3qwJtMMLNtL_MmdGeamBMRKRv8PcApBTFDIeQ2sdC7TG954HQxgdw0I8/s400/scanramones.jpg" /></a><br /><em>The last vestiges of the 1960s were blown away for good in 1976,<br />with the release of The Ramones's debut. (photo by Roberta Bayley)</em><br /><br /><br />And, yes, it's true the '68 presidential election wasn't the<br /><br />squeaker it has been made out to be (as I noted in The Daily<br /><br />Digression of September 30, 2007, posted below, the combined<br /><br />right wing vote -- Nixon's total plus Wallace's -- equalled<br /><br />almost 60%). But that doesn't really say anything about<br /><br />the conservatism of the era, because a big percentage of<br /><br />anti-war Democrats -- put off by the party's unfair treatment<br /><br />of Eugene McCarthy, depressed by the assassination of Robert<br /><br />Kennedy and unenthusiastic about Hubert Humphrey, who they<br /><br />considered a puppet of LBJ -- didn't vote.<br /><br /><br /><br />My own remembrance of 1968: I was in the 6th grade and<br /><br />unusually politically active for my age. (Below is my<br /><br />6th grade class notebook cover, on which I wrote<br /><br />"Julian Bond" for president. Bond had recently given<br /><br />an impressive speech at the Democratic National Convention.)<br /><br /><br /><br />Every weekend for a time in 1968, I'd write a new political<br /><br />speech -- on the Abe Fortas controversy or on the ABM treaty or<br /><br />on the latest bombing in Vietnam -- and deliver it on a garbage<br /><br />can in the backyard of our suburban house; and my audience<br /><br />was always exactly one person: my younger sister, who<br /><br />would sit quietly and listen as brother Paul gave his speech.<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAXyoZhBXMdmy9x20dInOIONXBWkRO08mjwfI7n8OL0slgTB73qSeuTY72jRKPh44cMnIpMU-bnFM42cpIchOz31W4LuHojG1KCOWHHVCSgnH4vpIi-eP5OrnqZDI8jRzZz78yLXSrXmo/s1600-h/scanjulian.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130520258502865554" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAXyoZhBXMdmy9x20dInOIONXBWkRO08mjwfI7n8OL0slgTB73qSeuTY72jRKPh44cMnIpMU-bnFM42cpIchOz31W4LuHojG1KCOWHHVCSgnH4vpIi-eP5OrnqZDI8jRzZz78yLXSrXmo/s400/scanjulian.jpg" /></a><br /><em>I was for Julian Bond for President in the 6th grade. </em><br /><br /><br />Taking my cue from the college protesters of the<br /><br />day, I initiated and organized a cafeteria boycott in<br /><br />the 6th grade to protest a new rule that said students<br /><br />were not allowed to go to the bathroom without<br /><br />being accompanied by someone else (in<br /><br />order to prevent graffiti).<br /><br /><br /><br />The night before the boycott, I phoned almost everybody in<br /><br />the sixth grade class at Riverhills Elementary School<br /><br />in Temple Terrace, Florida, and asked them to bring<br /><br />their own lunches and to boycott the school's cafeteria<br /><br />food that week. Then I enlisted my younger sister<br /><br />and had her call her own friends in the 4th grade<br /><br />to ask them to join in, too.<br /><br /><br /><br />Much to my surprise, my boycott was a massive success.<br /><br />Nearly everybody brought their own lunches that week,<br /><br />and the school had mountains of uneaten beans and rice<br /><br />and Salisbury Steaks left over at the end of each day.<br /><br /><br /><br />School officials were pissed. When they found out<br /><br />I was the person behind the cafeteria boycott, I was<br /><br />called in by the principal, who sounded like a George<br /><br />Wallace supporter as she gave me a stern lecture<br /><br />condemning the rebelliousness of Today's Youth.<br /><br />I was eleven years old and was already seeing the<br /><br />downside of being the Mark Rudd/Abbie Hoffman of<br /><br />Riverhills Elementary!<br /><br /><br /><br />The next year, I attended a progressive private<br /><br />school where I was happy to have been given an outlet<br /><br />for my political ideas: a newspaper called The Weekly<br /><br />Wong. My first articles for the paper, in 1969, were<br /><br />an anti-Nixon satire called "I Dreamed I Was Richard<br /><br />Nixon" and an anti-war editorial (both are<br /><br />posted below).<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrIE_xb2myq445pPx6ZWPj4Zoz2cgrb21pCYIAg3wkf9uU6Hc1XpA-Ct1EIJvxJCI73Ev5T877YH1_KIzl5fxVB-sxP7gW8QQlVt5H_DtcPY0ZoS6Aqi48b1M_2LyGthEfY1sM8Ce1A2Q/s1600-h/scanwong1.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130523501203174050" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhrIE_xb2myq445pPx6ZWPj4Zoz2cgrb21pCYIAg3wkf9uU6Hc1XpA-Ct1EIJvxJCI73Ev5T877YH1_KIzl5fxVB-sxP7gW8QQlVt5H_DtcPY0ZoS6Aqi48b1M_2LyGthEfY1sM8Ce1A2Q/s400/scanwong1.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Satirizing Nixon, when I was 12 (aw, c'mon -- what d'ya expect? I was barely out of elementary school!!).</em><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR7ds2_ZrtWaJR1HQUujDn83nuGhefUqQPlgwdh_B33ahatQCkMlA7pbPGqz3qRhoCdgkylrZ9yo84c1y9TX3iORGXj80bVESM69Txmx0dWofSHLsDScUUZls4oOEPqkPbi1yJYyzyt0Q/s1600-h/scanwong2.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130524570650030770" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR7ds2_ZrtWaJR1HQUujDn83nuGhefUqQPlgwdh_B33ahatQCkMlA7pbPGqz3qRhoCdgkylrZ9yo84c1y9TX3iORGXj80bVESM69Txmx0dWofSHLsDScUUZls4oOEPqkPbi1yJYyzyt0Q/s400/scanwong2.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Opposing the Vietnam War, at age 12.</em><br /><br /><br />By 1969, when I was 12, I had already gone beyond student<br /><br />politics to community activism, and some of it was even<br /><br />covered by the main newspaper of my hometown at the time, The<br /><br />Tampa Tribune (there was an article in the Tribune in '69<br /><br />about my anti-war fundraising and another article in '73 or '74<br /><br />quoting me about an Impeach Nixon rally I had helped to organize).<br /><br /><br /><br />But my political outbursts had actually started<br /><br />much earlier, at age seven, in 1964, when I wrote this<br /><br />scathing "editorial" about the presidential race<br /><br />(no, I wasn't a Goldwater Girl!):<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi45uMbNY9BIlDdaV3WW9fI8qVvmAgvTcpCzbwwi6qEQqapl48u6hG3s0ZbLq-taQLY96BnwabfkuAwUwYL7UW1dS7rlg3i9F1-bbzlMH7XRPbX6TQ4nXUqEmsc9aVR_uZD_1dpfX66H58/s1600-h/scangoldwaternut.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130525571377410754" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi45uMbNY9BIlDdaV3WW9fI8qVvmAgvTcpCzbwwi6qEQqapl48u6hG3s0ZbLq-taQLY96BnwabfkuAwUwYL7UW1dS7rlg3i9F1-bbzlMH7XRPbX6TQ4nXUqEmsc9aVR_uZD_1dpfX66H58/s400/scangoldwaternut.jpg" /></a><br /><em>scathing editorial I wrote at age 7.</em><br /><br />And this one:<br /><br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi255mc2ezsHSn9GdKy3AuWBv2xjOYzaZMW5inTiHbmoD0TEVR5Dh6OWTD2BI-4btbyKpYB1BulW5HvjyXHy1PLhGH43thb3W1_chyCxnIhOG2AdCOLEHW50-cyGEANYzXZW7kDIWit_uE/s1600-h/scanlbj4usa.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130526408896033490" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi255mc2ezsHSn9GdKy3AuWBv2xjOYzaZMW5inTiHbmoD0TEVR5Dh6OWTD2BI-4btbyKpYB1BulW5HvjyXHy1PLhGH43thb3W1_chyCxnIhOG2AdCOLEHW50-cyGEANYzXZW7kDIWit_uE/s400/scanlbj4usa.jpg" /></a><br /><em>an endorsement, at age 7.</em><br /><br /><br /><strong>[Incidentally, my political activism happened almost exclusively<br /><br />between the ages of 10 and 17; since age 18, I've not been<br /><br />politically active. (I've taken a different direction and gone on to<br /><br />write and report for almost all the major newspapers in the U.S. and for<br /><br />several magazines.) Interesting that I was extremely involved in<br /><br />politics in childhood but am not today, in contrast to my sister, who<br /><br />was not very active in politics in childhood but is extremely involved<br /><br />in it today.]</strong><br /><br /><br />On a day-to-day level, what did the 1960s really look and feel<br /><br />like in America? To be honest: like the suburban landscape<br /><br />portrayed in the first part of the movie "Apollo 13," which<br /><br />inadvertently captures the co-existence of both the Silent<br /><br />Majority and the Baby Boomers. (And, yes, the break-up of<br /><br />the Beatles was truly that traumatic if you were of a<br /><br />certain age!) Now that I think of it, even more accurate<br /><br />was the Sixties suburbia of Oliver Stone's "Born on the 4th<br /><br />of July."<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEge9H0UC6A16jUT7wbOZhPKo8toVTia4P1ENl4eW3FH9vNWSi4AieFj6uW5IVp22CWwXxntavnodsRPAeEAWi0rOEm529QM3eQ1UTlEOU7P_qg0AbKNZtafBYB4NdUyauLulm-MUwZL_xE/s1600-h/scanlavventura.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; DISPLAY: block; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5130528998761313010" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEge9H0UC6A16jUT7wbOZhPKo8toVTia4P1ENl4eW3FH9vNWSi4AieFj6uW5IVp22CWwXxntavnodsRPAeEAWi0rOEm529QM3eQ1UTlEOU7P_qg0AbKNZtafBYB4NdUyauLulm-MUwZL_xE/s400/scanlavventura.jpg" /></a><br /><em>Sixties movies (and feminism) arguably began right here,<br />with Michelangelo Antonioni's "L'Avventura,"<br />which resonates even today (David Chase's<br />open-ended "Sopranos" finale echoes the ending<br />of the film). </em><br /><br /><br />But I digress. Paul<br /><br />__________________<br /><br /><strong><br />ALL DAILY DIGRESSIONS PRIOR TO NOVEMBER 6, 2007, ARE AVAILABLE AT<br />WWW.DAILYDIGRESSIONARCHIVE.BLOGSPOT.COM. </strong><blockquote></blockquote><blockquote></blockquote>Paul Ioriohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08705568747562061407noreply@blogger.com0